Archive for Recommendations

Man Cave: Of sanctuaries and retreats

lisacolondelay / October 22, 2010 / No comments

(A Room Decoration and Demarcation)

It’s been said that the adult male human regularly needs some “down time” after a work day (a.k.a. Cave Time) to rejuvenate, find refreshment, recharge, gain clarity, and so on.

BUT-I doubt–a LOT–that “cave time” is truly a need reserved for the masculine of the species.

As many men will attest, females also enjoy and feel the need to retreat, and find refreshment. For some women it looks like taking a walk alone, reading a book while soaking in a bubble bath, or even not being alone–such as, sharing emotions with a trusted friend or ally.

Whatever this time looks like, it is a demarcated boundary of sanctuary, and vitally important to good mental health, and a balanced life–notwithstanding the spiritual benefits.

My husband doesn’t feel he needs a “den” or a man gym set up in the basement to get his man cave time in. He most enjoys a vigorous bike ride through the beautiful countryside on his road bike. I most like a variety of sanctuaries and refreshing conduits–both with others and without.

It’s not a weakness or a shame to realize you need space, and find your own space routinely (be it physical space, quite down time, mental respite, or beneficial time of social interaction). It is part of how we [all] live out our humanity fully, and how we are better able to best rejoin to loved ones, and others in our work or social lives in the most healthy way. If you don’t alreadly, encourage your loved ones to carve out demarcated time for this human need, as well as maintain your own. Seriously. Put in on the calendar or in your planner. It’s really that important. Be systematic so you stick with it, and keep your appointments with yourself. You will be surprised how much everyone will benefit.

Do you get the “cave time” you feel you need?

What does cave time look, or sound like for you?

Any body know Scripture that encourages ‘cave time’?

I look forward to your responses. Thanks.

Category: Christ, Christianity, coffee, Community, devotions, Humor, Integrating Spirituality, Life As Prayer, Mysticism, Prayer, Recommendations, Scriptures, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices, Spirituality, stress, Walking with God, worldviews, Worship / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Spiritual Growth: Resource (Event)

lisacolondelay / October 7, 2010 / No comments

What is spiritual formation?

The Spiritual Formation Discovery (event) is presented by Imago Christi an international and cross-cultural spiritual formation ministry of Church Resource Ministries (CRM). Imago Christi develops spiritual formation resources and coaches Christian leaders around the world.

www.ImagoChristi.org

If you’re interested in attending the Imago Christi Lancaster PA event, please let me know.

Category: Christianity, Christians, Community, Integrating Spirituality, leadership, Life As Prayer, ministry, Prayer, Recommendations, Scriptures, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices, Spirituality, Theology, Walking with God, worldviews, Worship / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

10 Things Not to Say at an Interview

lisacolondelay / July 28, 2010 / No comments

(photo: "Don't touch the hair of a prospective boss!")

A very long interview reminded me of how stressful they can seem.

With so many people looking for work and too few jobs, it’s no wonder people make mistakes during an interview.

QUICK TIPS:
•Don’t let panic strike you, especially if you have a weak bladder.
•Don’t say anything that pops into your head, even if it seems funny.
•A case of the nerves can make you think of super funny things to say that are actually inappropriate, and you might not really realize that until later.
•If you’re nervous, calm yourself with a mantrum (MAUN-trum), but don’t say it out loud, especially while rocking back and forth. Also, settle for decaf. I mean that.

Here are some great things to not say during your interview:

10. “You can’t call my references because they all have died…rather suddenly.”

9. “Why do your eyes tell me I have the job, but they also say, ‘stay away from dairy’?”

8. “You look almost exactly like the pedophile that lives down the street from me. You must be related. Do you know Chester the Child Moles…oh wait, that’s not his real name .”

7. “I’ve said it a thousand times, ‘Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful. Hate me because I’m much smarter than you’.”

6. “Oh, I’m sorry; that hair was impossibly long. I didn’t think is was connected.” (based on an actual conversation, but not one of mine)

5. “What is your policy about smoking pot in the office?”

4. “I have this crazy feeling we’ve met. Were you ever a little smellier and homeless?”

3. “Pull my finger. No seriously, this is hilarious.”

2. “Gosh, I haven’t been asked that since my last DUI.”

1. “Oh, yeah, I’m going to love your office, once your gone… and I know what you’re thinking! Of course I’ll repaint it.”

Now it’s your turn: What are some other things not to say?

Get creative!

Category: #fail, fear, Humor, Recommendations, Self-esteem, stress, temptation / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

otium sanctum means…

lisacolondelay / July 28, 2010 / No comments

(photo: Thomas Merton)

A friend’s comment spoke volumes to me, so I wanted to devote a post on the idea.

“The key to spiritual growth is otium sanctum, so hard to trust in our world that values efficiency and quick results.” -Doug Jackson (Excerpt of his comment on the previous post.)

On page 85 in his book, Spiritual Direction and Meditation, Thomas Merton explains otium sanctum:

Now the Fathers of the Church well understood the importance of a certain “holy leisure”  [or] “otium sanctum.” We cannot give ourselves to spiritual things if we are always swept off our feet by a multitude of external activities. Business is not the supreme virtue, and sanctity is not measured by the amount of work we accomplish. Perfection is found in the purity of our love for God, and there is plenty of  time for it to mature.

Otium Sanctum is part of the not doing– It’s the “hard work” of that. The notion is paradoxical certainly, but bluntly revelatory.

How do you “not do” in your life, or for God which brings you to greater maturity?

Do you think God does or does not function with otium sanctum?

If so, how?

Thanks for your participation on this one.


Category: Authors, Christ, Christians, Community, God's will, Integrating Spirituality, Life As Prayer, ministry, Mysticism, philosophy, Prayer, Quotes, Recommendations, Response to Reader, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices, Spirituality, Theology, Walking with God, worldviews, Worship / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

My Utmost for His Highest

lisacolondelay / July 21, 2010 / No comments

Mr. Oswald Chambers (the copyrights to the photo have expired)

Rarely do devotional classics of the caliber of Oswald Chambers’ My Utmost for His Highest disappoint.

I’ll have you know, this classic is like the Chuck Norris of devotions.

Each day you can be encouraged my the divine inspiration that came through his pen for these short devotions. (Oh, you know, calm down… I’m not saying it’s The Bible. It’s just, simply put, (in academic terms I learned in graduate school)…. “frickin’ awesome”.

Find it here. Just add it to you bookmarks and be done with the searching, already.

Time needed 3-6 min: Your spiritual challenge today is…

1. Link to MUfHH,

2. Read 1-3 days’ worth of entires, and

3. Comment here, with any sort of insight or thought you’d like.

Thank you and may you enjoy Chambers as much as I have.

Category: Authors, Christianity, free book, Integrating Spirituality, Recommendations, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Spiritual Challenge: Prayer of Release

lisacolondelay / July 20, 2010 / 4 comments

Spiritual Challenge:

Find a stone, and hold it tightly.

See it, and feel it as the weight of your worries.

Say a prayer of release.

Then, drop it and walk away.

Your comments are welcome here. We hope you share them.

Category: depression, Integrating Spirituality, Life As Prayer, Nature, Recommendations, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices, Spirituality, stress, suffering, Theology, Walking with God, Worship / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Training for change: "The Show about Me" part III

lisacolondelay / July 13, 2010 / No comments

conversation is not about you

I use the word “training” here, because if I used the word “discipline” it would be an immediate turn off. You may just click away in a huff or something. I’m tip toeing around for you this time.

Discipline has a “dirty word” feel to it now, right? We seem to associate it with pain for the sake of gain, or something too hard, or bothersome. Really, a disciple is a person in a training mode, learning, and absorbing things meant to improve him and his life.

This post is the third installment to deconstruct and renovate our lives that have taken on the “personal reality show” traits. This default setting we have to center our lives around our desires, wants, needs, and shortcomings, keep us stuck. Gone is the life-giving existence that comes from understanding that Reality is the realm of God–It’s not about us. We are invited into a richer, deeper Story that isn’t gained or lost with our successes or failures. God is the Star of the show, and it’s his Story. This is a life lived in the realm of peace/shalom. Lay your burdens down, friend.

You may have some ideas in mind of what life looks like once this changeover has been made. I’m hoping you’ll share your ideas about it. I’ll 5 ways a person lives out a greater Story, and maybe we can all learn something.

When you live the bigger Story…

1. You regularly  make and keep unlikely friends.

You don’t see people as tools for your own purposes, or to satisfy your desires and needs. No one is beneath you in the social strata, because you can well see that it’s not your story, but God’s. God’s Story includes all people, so you do too.

2. You regularly give to those who cannot repay you.

(Volunteer) Your actions stop being about personal gratification and getting ahead in some way. Giving freely punctuates this idea. You realize that generosity is life-giving in its own right, and it’s a win-win situation.

3. You shut up more, ask questions, and wait for the full answer.

Talking with people isn’t about saying something, being heard, or pitching some kind of agenda. It’s about the other person. You ask questions to know better, to understand better, and you give up the selfishness inherent in small story communication.

4. You stop self-promoting.

Making sure others see you in a certain light doesn’t balloon anymore as a thrust of your interactions. Sharing has nothing to do with making yourself look good, or impressing people. The self-centeredness is gutted from your words and actions, making life about something far bigger and better than you.

5. You listen.

In small stories we listen to get an edge. Sometimes what we call “listening” is really just pausing briefly out of some rudimentary convention, so that when we speak, we can be better heard (but only because we aren’t literally talking over someone). It boils down to merely “listening” for a chance to speak; but this is not genuine listening. When we listen, we change. The interaction makes us somehow different than we were before.

If you train with these 5 ways of interacting and seeing Reality in mind, it will give you no choice but to improve your life as you yield to a bigger Story.

Share your thoughts…

Category: depression, God's will, hope, Integrating Spirituality, Life As Prayer, Prayer, Recommendations, Self-test, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices, Spirituality, stress, Theology, Walking with God, worldviews, Worship / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Mystically Wired: A book review

lisacolondelay / July 5, 2010 / No comments

A book to change the way you see God and communicate with him.

Thomas Nelson Publishing, through their poorly-named, BookSneeze I review for BookSneeze initiative, sent me Ken Wilson’s book Mystically Wired: Exploring New Realms in Prayer.

This book promised to hit the sweet-spot of my spiritual interests, and I was not disappointed. Wilson was spot on starting out in his book that our first priority in seeking God and utilizing prayer is to pray for the desire to pray. This often overlooked first-things-first way allows us to receive from God a thirst for him (which comes via God, not us). This step invigorates our longing to communicate and be more aware of God.

Wilson gives a thoughtful and careful look at prayer, and our inherent basic need for interaction with God as Spirit shows us that we actually all pray for peace–peace of mind.

A “mystic” sense of God is not a pickled and preserved static view of a far-off Being, but an ongoing dew-kissed refreshment to our souls that adds richness to our spiritual life, our growth, meaning in life, discovery, and general renewal. It is realizing that God is great, mysterious, unfathomable, available, and quite nearby. It’s the beginning of a deep and nourishing relationship.

This way of apprehending God is a critical aspect of a walk with God. It is also a seminal part of Christian history, faith, and ongoing transformation toward holiness.

As a person who’s spent hundreds of hours studying prayer on the graduate level, and enriching my own walk with God through a rich prayer life, I can truly say, “Well done, Mr Wilson.”

Here’s the product page description from the publisher.

To read samples, find out more, or purchase it, you’ll find it here at Amazon.

Category: Authors, blogging, Books, Christ, Christianity, Christians, church, free book, Integrating Spirituality, Mysticism, Prayer, Recommendations, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices, Spirituality, Theology, Walking with God, worldviews, Worship / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

"The Show About Me"…is just re-runs (part 1)

lisacolondelay / July 2, 2010 / No comments

Life *seems* like a "show about you" b/c you are in every scene and every episode.

If you’re reading because of my column in Schuylkill-News, welcome! (Be sure to join up with S-N on facebook, and get hip to the latest news items and great tips and stories before they hit the newsstands. Tell Amy you enjoy her publication! She needs to know.)

Thanks for reading, and please leave your questions or comments, now or anytime.

Deconstructing the “Show about You” -

By default our heads are filled with an odd and faulty knowledge/sense that Life is a Show about ourselves. Each person thinks he/she must be the center of the universe (think: reality lived out), until something, or someone interrupts this notion. Living outside this worldview takes practice, increased maturity, and concerted effort. Cultural norms and money makers do not encourage us to turn the channel from “The Show About Me”.

Sounds like a blanket statement, right? It sounds like I’m saying everyone is a dirty, rotten jerk, and that can’t possibly be true?

Okay, let me back it up and just start with a few questions:

Think about these 5 questions as you read them and answer truthfully (to yourself, or if you feel that sharing will help others, leave your results in the comment section).

1. When you wake up in the morning do you think about the upcoming events in your day, or focus on your feelings?

2. Do thoughts of your past, present, or future occupy your time in your day?

3. Do you endeavor to find pleasure and avoid pain?

4. Do you mentally weigh the personal benefit when making decisions and actions?

5. Do you long for people to think well of you, and you make decisions based on this factor?

Okay, maybe you skimmed those questions.

Maybe you don’t want to do a personal inventory. If you want to move on, and this is getting weird or uncomfortable, you’re headed for a rerun. I’ll get to that in a minute.

Before that happens, please, go back, for one more minute and read and consider the 5 questions. After you’re done,consider your results. If you answered “yes” or “sometimes” at all, you are fairly normal, and you are also living your life as the Main Star of your Show. You perceive reality as something that centers around, basically, _________. <—— (say your name here.)

So what? you say, doesn’t everyone? What’s the big deal?

Well, friends, it’s only a big deal if you want to feel unstuck….If watching the same re-runs of yourself meeting the same sorts of dead ends and disappoints, and having the same insatiable cravings, growing frustrations, and restricted and delayed growth wears on you, then yes, the deal is starting to head into a biggish area.

Seriously, re-runs are really what you get when the season’s over. No one is working anymore, and the networks hope more rehash won’t be too egregious and lame. After two or three times of the same stuff, we usually want something new, something better.

A whole other Reality is going on, and has been long before you, and will long after you. You may have been skimming on the surface of it, but you have to wake up and realize thoroughly that you are not the Star of the Show, and more importantly, it’s not your Show.

‘Ever seen the movie the Matrix? It’s like, but with fewer people wearing sunglasses. …. oh never mind, The Matrix explanation is WAY too long and slippery. You’ll think you’re Neo, and we’ll be back where I started.

There’s a bit more to come:

In a few days, Part II of this reflection will get down deeper. Soon, I’ll also offer mental, spiritual, and emotional (concrete) ways many people have truly shifted their view to a more healthy one. We’re just getting the engine started on this vehicle to a new perspective. Let’s stick together–Meet back here soon.

Always feel free to leave your thoughts, experiences, or comments here. (Just after the tags below this post, it’ll say Leave a Comment. Not to be too obvious, and insult you, but….You click that.)

Or answer some questions:

Any guesses who the Star of the Show is?

What do you think Reality looks like with this different worldview/perspective?

And how would it be lived out? (examples, generalities, etc.)

Category: #fail, Authors, Bible, blogging, Christ, Christianity, Christians, God's will, Gratitude, Humor, Integrating Spirituality, Jesus, Life As Prayer, Recommendations, Scriptures, Self-esteem, Spiritual growth, Spirituality, Theology, Walking with God, worldviews / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Lifestyle Design-Hot Tip (Pimp your celly)

lisacolondelay / June 23, 2010 / No comments

No one will ever confuse me with Lifestyle Design guru, and polymath Tim Ferriss, but I have a cool tip that could save you a bunch of time if you own a mobile phone.

Messages...messages...messages AHHHHhhhh

Have you ever tried to reach someone quickly, and had to call every phone they have? As you hear the ringing sound you basically shoot up little prayers, in hopes they will answer, ”Oh, God, please God, let her pick up!” It’s got begging written all over it. Then you end up leaving one message per device, and wondering if or when they’ll get the message, and which one message will it be. Was the first one too frantic? Did you skip any info. on the third try? And when might they call you back? Yikes~”What if he left his phone in the car, and doesn’t get the message until he gets home? Ahhh.”

This JUST happened to me as I tried to contact my son’s autistic therapy program manager. I still haven’t heard from her. It’s a crap shoot…

Well, in typical fashion, Google as a free way to streamline and simplify this whole system and situation, seamlessly. The application will even turn phone messages into texts and send them to you. I like that one! I’m about to give it a try, if you do, let me know. If this seems like a helpful idea for your life, you might want to check out their short info video, and be dazzled by the wonders of technology, here –> Google/voice

Tim Ferriss, are you proud of me, or what?

Category: Authors, Community, Free Stuff, hope, Prayer, Prayer Follies, Recommendations, technology, travel / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Short Prayers and Cries for Help

lisacolondelay / June 7, 2010 / No comments

Suggestions for getting help

The greatly maligned short prayer! Is it really legit?

When we need help, we should ask for it. If we only ask for help, something has got to be wrong. What kind of friend only pops up to scream out for help? The mooching kind, perhaps?

Yet, I’m here today to give you the good news that a short prayer to God for help, is not a prayer in vain. A sincere plea for God’s rescue or mercy is something that God has honored to seeking petitioners in the Scriptures.

The shortest prayer recorded is from Jesus’ disciple who feared drowning–Just 3 words:

“Lord, save me,” Simon Peter. (Matt 14.30)

In reality, a saving prayer is the most important kind.

This tells us something about the benevolence of the Living God. Pagan gods of old needed much formality, and a host of preparatory rituals, and highly respectful observances, and rites so the petitioner could escape enormous fury from the deity. Yes, (false) deities are a lot like people when it comes to wanting plenty of respect. The Living God–the One who hands down deserves the utmost respect–in an unexpected twist, accepts “prayers on the fly”. What a gracious and humble God.

Another short and ancient Christian prayer came to be a Western staple after being mentioned its importance to the Eastern Desert monks, by the Abba Isaac of Scete, as written in The Conferences by St. John Cassian. I highly suggest reading this interesting and enlightening devotional classic. (click link) The power of this short prayer, and its uses are fleshed out very well.

Here’s a tiny portion: In order that the vigour of this courage may, by God’s grace, continue in me still longer, I must cry out with all my powers, “O God, make speed to save me: O Lord, make haste to help me.”

I’ve also thanked God with short prayers. What short prayers have you used?

…Out of curiousity-How often do you say short prayers? (once per hour? per day? per week?)

…Or what % of your prayer life might be of this brief sort?

Your responses are valuable. Thank you!

If you enjoyed this post, don’t miss the next issue. Click the “Wow…” button in the right column. Thank you.
Category: Bible, Christ, Christianity, Christians, church, Community, depression, fear, God's will, Gratitude, hope, Humor, Jesus, Life As Prayer, Life As Prayer update, ministry, Prayer, Prayer Follies, Quotes, Recommendations, Scriptures, Sexual temptation, Spiritual growth, Spiritual practices, Spirituality, stress, suffering, temptation, Theology, Walking with God, worldviews, Worship / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

What's the Good of Pleading?

lisacolondelay / May 21, 2010 / No comments

Do you think pleading just another way of going too far?

I was never a fan of the plea, “Pretty please” with or without cherries on top. Asking for something: Should this ever be paired with an ice cream sundae type of association? I don’t think so. Food and petitions should stay in separate categories, just like tea and coffee. Or drug addicts and congressmen.


ain't too proud to beg?

Does pleading scream, “I’m really needy and pathetic!”

Probably sometimes.

However, maybe *direct asking*–if it’s not too annoying–can put something in front of the right person, at just the right time. Something they don’t even know they want just yet, and then blamo, a need is filled. The world is a slightly better place. I said -slightly-.

Maybe pleading, when done properly, is just posturing, timing, and passion meeting in a perfect storm intersection of opportunity.

Well, whatever you call it, I’m going to give it a try:

(So brace yourself)

If you haven’t subscribed to this blog, please do.

It’s quick, convenient, and reversible (if need be).

(I will not spam your inbox…it’s not how I roll).

Being a subscriber means that my blog posts will get sent straight to you with no fuss or bother.

You needn’t even make here to see what’s cookin’.

You’ll never get behind, but at the same time, you’ll be in control.

Conveniently, there are links in the direct email that can get you here in a jiffy, if you’d like to contribute.

It’s good times.

(To get plugged in, click the button on the right that says, “Wow. So simple. so easy. yes!”)

I’m not sure if that’s begging, pleading, asking nicely, or none of the above, but it’s really the most direct approach I’ve ever tried. I hope you’ll subscribe.

And -Thanks for reading this blog, in any form. It means a lot to me that you came by.

-Lisa

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Category: Authors, blogging, Christians, Community, hope, Humor, Life As Prayer, ministry, Recommendations, worldviews / Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
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