“When people deny the humanity of others, they become evil themselves.”  -N.T. Wright

I’m preparing to do a quarter of a year (January-March) teaching with the themes and the companion videos of Tom Wright’s book Evil and the Justice of God.

We’ll be tackling some tough territory:

• Why is there so much Evil in the world? (More than ever?)

• Why does God let it happen and what, if anything, is God doing really about it? (What’s going on?)

• How does the Bible approach the subject? (Whoa. Lots of common misunderstandings here!)

• How does Justice work? (Revenge, Justice, Mercy, we’ll be sorting that out.)

• What is our role or best response with regards to Evil? (Do we stand against it, roll over, avoid it, bear it? The answers may surprise you.)

If you can’t make the classes Sundays 9:30-10:15 a.m. at Bethesda, I’ll be highlighting items here as I work on it and as I teach.

Here’s an intro video trailer. The book is remarkable. I highly recommend it.

I’ve surfed Niagara Falls.
It was a hyper realistic dream that I could control. I woke up inside my dream and went down that thing about 5 times.
Loved it!

It’s called lucid dreaming.

I’ve been doing it since I was about 7 years old.

Did you know that you can Learn Lucid Dreaming! You’ll love it.

Even someone that can’t usually remember dreaming at all can learn how to remember more dreams (sometimes 3-7 a night). You can learn ways to control aspects of your dreams (great when you have a nightmare or nasty reoccurring dream), and even become conscious and prolong a consciousness while in a true sleeping/dreaming state.

It helps with anxiety, building good relaxation habits, and empowers you in waking life! You can have experiences you could never have, or problem solve in ways you didn’t think were possible. It’s a huge creativity boost too.

You spend 1/3 of your WHOLE LIFE sleeping, why not make the best of it?

I just published a Guide with everything you need to know at Amazon. (Sparky’s Go-to Guide for Dream Control)

You may notice that it’s co-written by Sparky Pronto…that’s another upcoming surprise. I’ll keep you posted with more news soon.

Even better, this Go-to Guide is FREE this Monday, 11.12.2012.

I hope you like it!

One More Thing:

Do you have trouble sleeping, or with nightmares or unsettling reoccurring dreams? Do you want to know what a certain dream might mean? Contact me for guidance. There’s no charge for a consultation, but I can only accommodate 10 requests.

So enjoy

&

Sweet Dreams!

I’m getting so much out of this little book!

(I really recommend getting a copy. I saw one on Amazon for $1.50 (used). What a bargain!)

Henri Nouwen gathered his thoughts and pennend notes for his personal use during a difficult 6 months of reflection and healing. They were meant as private notes, but after 8 years a few friends encouraged him to have them organized and published sensing other soul searchers would be encouraged by them. His pain is often palpable and humble and his words are like food for kindred spirits. I’m grateful he was so brave.

page 59

Love Deeply
Do not hesitate to love and to love deeply. You might be afraid of the pain that deep love can cause. When those you love deeply reject you, leave you, or die, your heart will be broken. But that should not hold you back from loving deeply. The pain that comes from deep love makes your love ever more fruitful. It is like a plow that break the ground to allow the seed to take root and grow into a strong plant. Every time you experience the of rejection, absence, or death, you are faced with a choice. You can become bitter and decide no to love again, or you can stand straight in your pain and let the soil on which you stand become richer and more able to give life to new seeds.

The more you have loved and have allowed yourself to suffer because of your love, the more you will be able to let your heart grow wider and deeper. When your love is truly giving and receiving, those whom you love will not leave your heart even when they depart from you. They will become part of your self and thus gradually build a community within you.

Those you have deeply love become part of you. The longer you live, there will always be more people to be loved by you and to become part of your inner community. The wider your inner community becomes, the more easily you will recognize your own brothers and sisters in the strangers around you. Those who are alive within you will recognize those who live around you. The wider the community of your heart, the wider the community around you. Thus the pain of rejection, absence, and death can become fruitful. Yes, as you love deeply the ground of your heart will be broken more and more, but you will rejoice in the abundance of the fruit it will bear.

So, why is it that Lemurs look so freaked out? Like, a lot.

Are koala on the other end of the emotional animal spectrum? They are always so Zen, so casual. Sleepy but more than sleepy. Chill. Do the eucalyptus leaves they eat render a cannabis-vibe?

Incidentally, the mouse lemur looks like a combination of the two creatures.

I’ve been feeling like this Lemur looks.
We had an electrical fire, right after we packed it in for trick-or-treat night. It was smoke, sizzling, snaps, and weird burnt smells, and arcing bolts of live electrical current….and then the realization that you cannot put water on such a thing.

We were at the mercy of some stupid, ancient fire extinguisher dated to the Clinton-era.
Bill, that is.
Monica’s Bill.

Trust me. Weird Science is the ONLY time I care to view electricity in “dance-mode”. And even then, I won’t do so without wearing a bra hat in solidarity. It helps in acknowledging power beyond my understanding and control. I’m tempted to wear one in certain worship services. (I keep one in my purse.)

My husband wanted to call the fire department. Volunteers…er Zealots of flame and noise that house their equipment just next door down. Good and decent boys and men who love their beer (sic.) and are quick to respond, and descend in great numbers …but not always appropriately. I shuttered at the thought.

Instead, we selected the “phone-a-friend” option. A seasoned citizen and professional electrician came over at 9:30 pm….surely his favorite way to spend a chilly Wednesday night!

I felt like an all-out Lemur. Nervous, near the brink of extinction, powerless in my surroundings.

I should mention that it ended well. Nothing combusted. No local first-responders were used. No evacuations, premature, or otherwise. Some repair was completed the following day. A leaky kitchen sink pipe had met with some exposed crawl-space wiring. And rodents chew this stuff because? Charges triggered several breakers and melted some stuff. Had we gone to bed without noticing that the kitchen flooring had buckled a little, I might be writing this from a homeless shelter.

Thankful.

UPDATES!

• Storm SANDY is gone. Our cable and internet power is gone too (I’m at a McDonalds today writing this).

• I’m featured on the (Moody Bible Radio’s) Midday Connection blog. I hope you can read it!  ARTICLE

• Soon I’ll be selling my digital book on AMAZON.
Soul Care VOL1-5 (Themes covered in the digital book will soon be featured and summarized at RELEVANT magazine online. WIN! I’ll post the link once I get it.)

• Do you want to write about something similar to the themes you see here? I have two guest post spots up for grabs in November. Do you want to contribute? Drop me a line, and let me know. :)

Thank you ALL so very much for your prayers for us during this monster storm. Please consider donating to the RED CROSS to help the many victims hurt by Sandy. If you can donate blood, they need it very badly. The storm disrupted 100 blood donation drives.

Today, I’m elucidating the anatomy of Worry in contrast with Meditation using this handy dandy visual I made.

Notice the differences.

Worry and Meditation have commonalities.

• Both activities involve circling/cycling, repeated thoughts, but how they circle is very different and give us different outcomes.

(monotheistic) Meditation centers on the good supreme God, and often the One described in the Bible. The love and presence of God energizes the one meditating. Thoughts and cares are kept in close contact with God, not one’s self or self-interests. Prayer, worship, and centering are interrelated with meditation.

In Worry (in Christians or any one) thoughts are repetitive and  ingrown, not centered on apart from self and move toward collapse, snuffing out our energy and health. Worry thoughts stay with the self, and do not move outward or around a stabilizing idea or deity. This causes degeneration into a Worry Spiral that undercuts growth, health, and well-being. Other problems may arise like illness, anxiety disorders, depression, paranoia, and much more.

In part 3, I’ll unpack how to move from Worry, which is negative, to Meditation which is peace and life-giving.

Did you read the previous Post? Please read Part 1 of this series where I discuss some common misunderstanding of Worry.

Do you think I got it right? What does Worry and Meditation look like for you?
Please, let me know.

• Recycling is when you take what appears to be garbage and you reform or reuse it again. But what’s this “up-cycle” stuff?

• Upcycling is when one converts waste materials or useless items into new materials or products of better quality or for better environmental value.

The act and habit of worrying can be upcycled and in the next few posts I’ll unravel that.

First–
Stuff you might not know about WORRY:

1. Out-of -balance hormones can spike worry. A dip in progesterone in women or a drop in testosterone in men, for instance.

(This means that you can’t always get a handle on worry just by “thinking your way out of it”. There’s biological component.)

2. Anxiety (often seen as worry and other related problems) can be a genetic predisposition that runs in families, like heart disease can.

3. Changing habits can lessen worry, much like eating a good diet can help slim you down even if you come from a family that’s…um..big boned.

The Hopeful News…
If you have a knack for worry (negative), then you may have a great capacity to meditate (positive). Prayer and mediation are almost synonyms, and overwhelming evidence shows that the use of prayer/meditation improves one’s level of anxiety, well-being, and health. Worry is a Soul issue. That means it’s more than mental or spiritual (the Soul is the whole of you and who you are). Soul Care address this. So, here we go!

Getting to a good place is NOT like throwing a switch, so I’ll start to tackle ways to move toward Upcycing worry more this week.

(photo source)

 Ranker, hype, and vitriol.

It’s about 30 Days until the 2012 Presidential election, and you can really tell.

I’ve tried to not get wound up. I’ve tried to ignore the surround-sound ejeculations of venom. But, it’s hard to not get sucked into all the emotion and survive the cross-fire unscathed.

 Big Bird even made the casualty list…Yes, the huge, friendly, yellow character for pre-schoolers on TV. Bear in mind that citizen support will never wane enough to make our feathered friend, or his cohorts, extinct. But, that fact doesn’t cull the madness, does it?

There’s looniness in the air!

It’s a soiling season, so I’ve tried to think of a few way to vitriol-proof myself. Maybe you can share a few tips. Here’s a few I’m using:

1. Unplug.
Short media fasts can reorient me to what’s most important: My regular life, the people nearest to me, and my deepest values that have much to do with Grace.

2. Think long-term.
As much as people “say so-and-so” will ruin everything forever, that’s 95% fear doing the talking. No vote will truly change as much as people say. (Insert which ever name you want to for “so-and-so”, both sides are tooting this horn.) I’m trying to regularly take a few steps back and try to gain wisdom from a more far-sighted perspective. It does help.

3. Feel powerless.
Huh? It may sound ridiculous to say it like that, but seriously, not too much is truly under our control. Admtting this is the first step for me. Changes, for good or for bad, do happen slower than we care to admit. So much is out of our immediate control. Policies, weather, illness, media, cultural hype, and much more. We can control our responses, but not others. We don’t get that much say and the frenzy is proof of that underlying fear.

…which leads me to #4!

4. Be a Duck.
A duck is the water foul that has the sort of feathers to make water bead and roll off, not soak in and cause problems. I try to think of this as a way of being. Unflappable. It’s engaged thoughtfulness sandwiched by what’s known in spiritual formation circles, and ancient Christian tradition, as “holy indifference”. That doesn’t mean I’m apathetic, it means I’m centered on the Source of Goodness through faith, and not tossed to and fro by opinions, circumstances, or any perceived impeding doom. (This takes loads of practice for me! I’m passionate, and through practice I’ve started to learn when to let that loose and when to dail it in. Though I fail too much, I continue the effort.)

Have you been effected and affected by these acerbic times?

What helps you?

Part of my journey, spiritually, has been to move from a fundamentalist upbringing, to an Evangelical / post-conservative theological formal training, and then toward “the mysteries” (i.e. mystic tendencies). What brought me there? Tremendous pain. I usually don’t talk of it for too long. Maybe there’s a memoir in me that should come to light, but the progression is palpable.

In “the mysteries” this means that I don’t think of suffering as a problem, sorrow as un-wellness, or bouts of profound unhappiness as a sign that I have too little faith. In fact, most of the biblical characters were kind of tortured souls. It’s a more recent construct that we should think the life of faith has a “Sunshine Mountain” feel to it.

So, I wanted to write out a few thoughts about what Mark Lepper posed out there on the Twitter-verse (see lower image).

My initial Twitter response (you see below) was less than 140 characters, so I thought I’d add a bit more.

@thelepper Nah. That notion helps us cope, but we can’t possibly verify it. It’s part of “the mysteries”

For just a moment…

Imagine your child kills himself. The most horrid thought (you needn’t linger there).

In the first few days, probably 20 people will tell you, “Everything happens for a reason.” Or, they’ll say, “All things work together for good…” You know the verse, right?

Rubbish.

(Probably most people don’t realize how out of context that verse is used that way. Erroneously they utilize just a part of it as a “band-aid platitude” to offer kindness.)

There are a great many things that have no good explanations and will not. The reasons won’t be revealed later either. On earth or in heaven. It really doesn’t work that way. And it really shouldn’t. Otherwise movement toward maturity would be at stake.

Really, it would be too confusing for us that God would answer these questions, so don’t count on an inquiry at the “ask the author” line in heaven, my dear friends.

When the pain of suffering wallops you and you can’t shelve your doubts long enough to work through the real hardship of it, one temptation is to consider that God must be malevolent or AWOL, instead of considering that we can’t possibly know the answer.

It is in the unknowing that we become enlightened to the ways of God.

It seems the two most common tactics (ways of coping) in tragedy are…

1. Try to believe that something horrible or evil has some sort of good redemptive reason, or will eventually come to something good because of it.

(Though it is true that God makes it his business to redeem everything…eventually….somehow…. we can’t think of this backward when we come into pain, and try jumping ahead. Pain can serve a point.)

2. Realize that so much is unexplainable and let our hope and faith erode or dissolve.

But there is a third option. And maybe more than just one more (you can let me know). Another way that’s been employed since humans have had optimism and spirituality (read: a very long time) is…

“the way of the mysteries”. And it’s not a cop out.

It’s farsighted. It’s a perspective that holds that the beauty we witness in this world is almost out of place in the nastiness and madness of it. It’s the idea of (good) ideals we all seem to possess that point to a greater, underlying and sustaining beauty and goodness obscured by the ways of the world, suffering, and the hardships of being human.

To embrace our situation as the mystics do is to not shun hardship or revel in it, but rather to let the pain refine us and make us wise. Oh, and it hurts. It hurts like hell.  And it, in some real sense, beats the hell out of us, and makes us endearing and compassionate. Beautiful.

The trouble is that if we’re satisfying with answers like, “Hey, friend! Don’t worry there’s a reason this horrible thing is happening,” then we are of very little good to those who are truly suffering.

In fact, our notions of “reasons” are often so pale and wanting. They just couldn’t possibly be sturdy enough. They don’t reveal what is legit and accurate.

Only when we can sit there alongside in the pain of those who hurt, and even take a part of the sorrow itself do we find we can make our way, honestly. And too, we must sit in our own pain. It’s uncomfortable. It’s dark. Sometimes horrid.

But to have the permission to hurt can send us toward wellness. It shows us that great sorrow comes on powerfully, and hurts badly, but does not have the final word. In the process of living well and deeply do we like a tender shoot become oaks of maturity and grace.

Please friends, be careful and don’t make a mockery of pain by disrespecting it or minimizing it (for yourself or anybody else). There is no human life without pain. There too is no growth without it. That’s the bit about incarnationality: The divine enters the human experience. That is our model.

So very deeply have I hurt, but now deeply can I love.

It’s true that redemption is chosen.

To be chosen it must first be acknowledged.

(that’s my longer answer)

Here’s a little reminder that everyone gets tired.

Everyone gets unbalanced.

Maybe you’ll be touched deeply and start crying when you hear a rapper slinging rhymes, which is really weird, but I did that.

Maybe you’ll just feel a heaviness in your heart that you can’t pinpoint. A slow burning ache, like the weight of the broken world is pushing in and perched on your sternum.

Maybe you’ll see relationships so broken and confusing and full of turmoil that you’ll start to disconnect.

Maybe you’ll snap at your kids, or get angry at a stranger whose story you can’t possibily know.

And grace will leak away from you and your ideals will be shelved, and you’ll wonder if you’re really a person who still believes in goodness anymore.

Here’s a word for you…and for me….

It hurts to be alive.

There are mysteries we want to know but can’t unravel.

You. Will. Get. Tired.

In this sorrow we are not alone, because we are the same.

(If you’d like to share your worry today or your burden, please do. In the comment section or using the contact me tab. I’ll pray for you, and maybe you can pray for me.)

It’s hard to absorb everything that I’ve seen and experienced here at the STORY conference  in Chicago. It’s a festival and experience punctuated with poignant presentations. I plan to have a day of silence just to process and pray.

Phil Vischer the founder of Big Idea and the voice of “Bob the Tomato” was the final presenter. His story was one of being miserable when he thought he had gotten what he wanted. He wanted to be the next Walt Disney, but he got stress. With success came a lawsuit that killed his Big Idea.

It turns out God wants us to change more than he cares about all the things we can do for him. All our talents and ideas even when they are noble and good aren’t as important as becoming who God wants us to be which is radically different than we are now.

The journey is never what we expect, and I wonder if living in the moment is closer to what we should do. A trust that is child-like in presentation. Expectant but not begrudging.

I think I should try to ee ready to say “yes” to God in whatever way big or small that is occurring at the time. Going with the flow…like a Jellyfish. (Phil said that his new company name “Jellyfish Labs” reflects this principle, because jellyfish go squishy-squishy up and squishy-squishy down, but the they are helpless to move another way. They must go where the current takes them.)

What a learning process life is. We think it’s more than squishy-squishy up and squishy-squishy down. We get to re-learn that a million times.

It takes being ruined or broken or ill to get us to that point sometimes. I think of my beloved Old Testament Professor who claimed true the same thing that Phil did. Talented in languages, he had big plans of making the Bible accessible, especially old testament law, which is always misunderstood and mistranslated. What great and ambitious goal. But he got very ill, and has battled illness and almost died many times in 3 decades since that time.

Is God keeping him at a certain spot? Just squishy-squishy up and squishy-squishy down, and hanging on to God for each moment and each day.

How will your Story end?

I can tell you this: It’s going to be a surprise. And that’s the point.

Here’s my first video of my STORY 2012 adventure in Chicago: packing.

It’s an introduction and a few packing tips I’ve picked up along the way. (Perhaps the only usable skill I gained as a kid from a divorced home. Thanks mom and dad!)

Most videos from my journey this week will go straight to the special youtube channel (for this and other adventures), and not be posted here on the blog. So, after today get the latest news and adventure in video form when you go here.

I’ll post updates and include videos and photos on my twitter and Facebook outlets.

Yatmandu via Compfight

The key to successful leadership today is influence, not authority.

— Kenneth Blanchard

Today’s Wisdom:

A Good Leader Invites.

Some bosses are still tyrannical and ill-tempered. Is it just immaturity, or is some of this vestiges of wartime attitudes that still seep into the management and leadership styles of corporations or even families?

“Do as I say. That’s an order, soldier!”

The big flaw in a bossy leadership style is that civilians are not subject to demands of rank and orders from a autocrats.

They can quit.

They can walk off the job, or worse than any of that, they can undermine everything and stay onboard, resentfully.

What kills morale more than passive-aggresive subordinates mucking up the works, sabotaging projects, and sucking the life out of a group? It’s dire.

Instead, Leaders of this era must INVITE rather than command.

That means that good Leaders draw in their followers rather than intimidating them.

Despot types will always be among us, but the focus in Leadership development these days isn’t about demanding respect. It’s about what gets results and makes positive change. It centers on earning respect.

Do you remember a time when a Leader invited you?

The best examples often come from the world of coaching and mentoring. These relationships are not forced, but forged, mutually.

There, Leadership is not where Authority is the predominant issue; trust is what counts.

I’m happy to be a Contributor at the Deeper Leader SyncrhoBlog that runs September 10-14th.

You’re welcome to add your voice too. Go here to get details. When you contribute, I’ll be sure to check for your link and read your contribution.

Jessica Lucia via Compfight

I was caught off guard. My spiritual mentor asked me today if I was gentle to myself.

“We must be Jesus to ourselves,” she said.

I was taken aback. I’ve heard about being Jesus to others, but I don’t think I’ve thought about using the same grace or perspective with myself.

I wonder if some of you need to hear that today.

Be gentle with yourself, as Jesus would be compassionate and gentle with you.

Any other way takes your life away. Saps you.

Peace to you,

-Lisa

Today I have the honor of being a guest at Ed Cyzewski’s blog. As a new proud daddy Ed is taking a paternity leave, but he’s planned a bunch of guest writers to keep us happy readers.

I’ve contributed a piece about the time I outgrew my small group, entitled, “Seasons of Belonging”.

Even though the misfit made belonging difficult it finally created the atmosphere for personal change and the beginning of a new journey.

Here’s the link.

Enjoy!

So, I have this story to tell you…

I enjoy reading blogs. I read dozens regularly, and this summer I stumbled on a discovery that has really changed how my day goes.

I stopped reading cranky bloggers. It sounds simple, right?

Hang in here with me for a moment, because there’s more.

I didn’t set out to read cranky bloggers, but since I’ve subtracted them from my reading diet things have improved in amazing ways.

• For one, I  feel more hopeful on many levels.

• I have more creative energy.

• I can think more clearly about my goals.

• And, best of all I don’t feel so dragged down, overall, you know in that way that’s hard to pinpoint what exactly what could be wrong. You just feel restless or bothered on an emotional subterranean level. 

Granted, lots of cranky bloggers can be interesting, entertaining, or provocative, and I have enjoyed reading them … but I also discovered that more is at stake as I write, create, and interact.

Grouchy people (bloggers or whoever) stifle my creative energy flow:
The fall out comes in terms of…

• problem solving,

• idea generation,

• interpersonal interaction,

• and the resolve to finish ideas all the way through.

It’s all become the higher priority for me rather than staying with the latest controversy or who-done-it tongue wagging.

A captive no more!

So, I unsubscribed to a bunch of writers who were routinely griping or negative. Sadly, I’ve found a number of Christian bloggers had to be cut from my list. They’re just not the cheery bunch you’d expect really. Some of them are quite popular, but oh well. It was a tough decision actually, but a good one…for me. Life-giving really.

I realize that maybe you’re different. Maybe the tit-for-tat cranky bloggers complete with their fiery commenters spark and enthuse your creative Muse. Do they? Maybe it’s their passion gives you a boost that you need to problem solve or unearth new ideas and projects, and carry them out.

But, does it? Really think about it:
After you read a rant post, or someone’s beef or complaint, and the string of ensuing comments, do you feel energized for your own work or creating your own unique art, or do you feel drained?

See, my creative Muse gets peeved. She distances herself from me, it seems. She finds a huff and leaves in it. Maybe out of embarrassment? Maybe out of frustration frustration? Maybe because it’s all so empty to be even a small part of what is ultimately fleeting and hallow. It’s beneath her. ”She”…yeah sure…I suppose that might seem silly to personify my creativity… (and pull a classic Steven Pressfield).

Nevertheless, I just know full well now that a diet of reading that includes grouchiness creates a dead weight I’m not willing to drag along anymore.

Incidentally, I’ve found the same thing holds true regarding viewing cable news shows (humorous, provocative, or otherwise), political pundits, or too many advertisements. Again, that’s my experience. The return on investment (of my time) doesn’t warrant a close tie.

Cynicism puts a machete to the roots of your creative Source. 

Here’s the surprise ending:

Originally, I thought to myself,

“Okay. I’ll just unsubscribe to this and that, and then in the mornings when I read my email I won’t see the latest and I won’t get sucked in to read them. Sure, that’s the ticket. Then I won’t creatively derail. Yeah! I’ll just find them later, or check after a week, and see what I missed, if anything.”

You know what happened?

I didn’t even miss it. I stopped caring about the hype. I hardly ever went back. I stopped wondering if I was missing a controversy or some buzz about the interwebs. It didn’t matter. It was chaff. I just felt better and had more to give. Perhaps I felt “cured” of that honey trap.

TRY THIS:
Try a diet of without cranky bloggers for just one week. Don’t open the email, or unsubscribe for just a week, and see if it makes a difference in your life. See if it increases your ability to be creative and amazing.

I think it will, and I wish you all the best!

Thanks for reading.

I’d love to hear from you on the topic.

Sorry to send you into a sugar coma with the cuteness today!

Today’s question is “What Quiets YOU?”

I was pleased to hear blogging and leadership superstar Michael Hyatt give out some serious props recently for naps and people who take them. I like working late, but my family needs me early. I need my naps. No, I don’t get them regularly. When I don’t something happens. I fall asleep reading. I go right into REM sleep too…as you might imagine.

Except for when I’m exhausted I can only nap when one other thing is in place:

I must feel safe.

If threats loom I am disquieted.

Trust is what quiets down my soul so I can wade through the rest of it, and lay me down to sleep. Trust in God, Trust in myself, and Trust in others.

In finding what quiets our souls we find not just peace, but vitality, and fullness. (click to tweet that reminder)

The hush may come from acceptance, wonder, rest, or satisfaction from a job well done, but it must be found.

Without it we just keep on wandering.

So ask yourself. “What Quiets Me?” How and where am I most settled?

Write down one word to remind yourself, and tape it up somewhere.

It will help you not just remember to find it, but it’ll help you remember who you really are.

I’m honored to be featured at Thom Turner’s blog today!

My contribution concerns prayers of desperation and covers a bit of spiritual formation. I haven’t posted too many prayers, so if you have a moment, I’d appreciate your comments or feedback, below or over there.

Article Link.

Photo Credit: Martin Sharman via Compfight

Photo Credit: Pulpolux !!! via Compfight

For instance, sometimes I crave and ingest sugar. Sometimes I numb-out with tech, or some distraction. Sometimes I grow irritable and wallow a bit. I could go on and on, but I’ll stop before we both get too embarrassed.

What are some of the neurotic things you do?

Kevin makes me laugh at his isle of man blog, so I invited him to post here. Enjoy!

BIO: Kevin Haggerty is a 32-year old husband and expecting father. He runs and writes for a humor blog called TheIsleOfMan.Net. For his full-time job, Kevin is a middle school teacher and basketball coach. He also writes for a mixed martial arts (MMA) blog called MMAMania.com. He’s the oldest of seven children, a continual skeptic and smart people think he’s funny (at least that’s what he tells himself).

The Day I Fell Down a Mountain

When I was a freshman in college, I sucked at being a student.

In high school, I graduated with honors. I worked hard, but nothing else was an option. Being the oldest of seven kids (which doesn’t give you the right to ask me if my parents like to have sex…so don’t), a lot was expected of me. I generally lived up to those expectations, but it took its toll.

By the time I got to college, I was completely burned out on studying, reading and being a student, in general. To give you some perspective, I went from a 3.9 high school GPA to a 1.8 freshman average.

My parents weren’t there to spur me on. No one got in my face when I failed a test. No one jerked the covers off of me when I slept pass my alarm clock. I was learning how to be an adult, and I was failing the course badly.

I wasn’t kidding. I sucked at being a student.

Everything culminated on one fateful day. The end of my first semester was nearing a close. We were in the middle of finals week. I had a History exam that morning. I needed to do well.

In high school, I coasted through History, like I did with most of my classes. I memorized the material and never really stretched any mental muscles. It was easy. I was barely trying.

College presented me with a whole new set of obstacles I’d never encountered before. Specifically, I had a History professor who had a very unique take on U.S. History. He taught us things I’d never heard before. In retrospect, I’m not even sure he was wrong, but it was unorthodox and outside the box. I had to really think in his class.

I hated it.

Back to the exam.

I woke up, in a panicked cold sweat, looking at my alarm clock to see that it was 7:50 a.m. Why is that a big deal? Because the exam was at 8.

I freaked.

I threw on the nearest school appropriate attire I could find in my disgusting mess of a dorm room and darted out the door.

I wasn’t walking. I wasn’t even jogging. There was no time for that. If I missed this exam, I’d fail the course. That was simply unacceptable. I had to make it. So I sprinted.

Did I mention it snowed the night before?

Well, it did. Not only did it snow, but the ground iced over. To further complicate matters, my dorm was situated on top of a steep hill. Are you starting to get the picture?

I could have gone down the stair cas

e. They’d even salted it. That would have been the smart move, but I was late. I had no time for stairs.

I stupidly maneuvered through the bushes that led down the slope of the hill. This was the shortcut we always took when we needed to get to the academic buildings faster.

I got there fast alright. Oh, did I ever.

As I ran through the bushes, I was greeted with a fresh patch of ice that caused my feet to betray me and fly in the air. I was literally head over heels. I continued my clumsy descent down the hillside, which stretched a good 100 or so feet. When I emerged from my adventure,

But I had an exam to take, so I got up, brushed myself off and continued to run like an idiot to the academic building.

As I endeavored on towards the door of the classroom, I saw the professor closing the door. If he shut it, he’d lock it. If he locked it, he would not unlock it. This was a series of events I could allow to occur.

So I ramped up my speed to “overdrive.” Luckily, I was able to grace the doorway before he had completely shut the door. More luckily, he allowed me to enter.

I don’t even remember how I did on the test. I think I did alright, and I passed the class. Regardless, that whole episode was part of my growth as a student.

I realized something very important that day. That wasn’t who I wanted to be. That wasn’t how I wanted to spend the rest of my college career. I needed to step my game up, and it took falling down a mountain to really gain the necessary perspective.

Has life ever used an icy hillside to get your attention?

public domain image

I wonder if much of the time, without knowing it, we operate as if the top model is correct. The one that puts us in the middle. We just ending up seeing the world and treating other people as if they revolve around us.

The second model is correct, but actually incomplete. That’s because compared to the known universe it’s hardly a spec. Our stories and even our problems are small compared to what’s really going on. Our stories and our pain matter, but they are not the center.

Enjoy your weekend. Keep things in perspective, okay?

Some poetry for reflection:

Psalms 8:3-5
“When I consider your heavens,
the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars,
which you have set in place,
what is man that you are mindful of him,
the son of man that you care for him?
You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings
and crowned him with glory and honor.”

click for photo source

In the latest issue of Harper’s Bazaar, actress Demi Moore replies to the question, “What scares you?” by saying,

“If I were to answer it just kind of bold-faced, I would say what scares me is that I’m going to ultimately find out at the end of my life that I’m really not lovable, that I’m not worthy of being loved. That there’s something fundamentally wrong with me … What scares me the most is not knowing and accepting that just about everything is not in my control. That makes me feel unsafe.”

Some people may claim the Hollywood starlet is speaking of a “God-shaped void” as Blaise Pascal once referred to it. But wait just a minute…

Not everybody will admit to this sort of thing. Some never gaze inward long enough to see it. But there it is. While many won’t realize what what the jilted Moore is talking about for themselves, I think this women has hit on a fundamentally human frailty fraught with universal relevancy. (And it has virtually nothing to do, in fact, with a certain shaggy-headed addition to the Two And A Half Man sitcom.) This frailty, I might add, is not actually negative, as we might first imagine, but rather part of the vulnerability that is the stuff of being human.

It’s these same underlying and exquisitely human fears that we mask, medicate, bury, avoid, deflect, or anesthetize, that cause all manner of destructive behaviors and coping mechanisms. For Demi, who was just hospitalized for stress-related health issues (namely exhaustion…and likely malnutrition), it can create potent consequences. It’s something wealth, influence, fame, accolades, and beauty doesn’t seem to ameliorate. Curious, no?

For many religion or spiritual practice helps to blunt the reality of our human predicament, but clearly that alone doesn’t seem to actually mend the situation. I refer not to just the situation of being mortal, but of being fundamentally impotent. Rarely is this gnawing sense placated for long. Demi, for one, is connected to the practice of Kabblah, but it hasn’t helped this core need.

Though her vulnerability and frailties are up for public scrutiny, many possess the same sorts of fears and maladies, and even despair, but go unnoticed.

To me, our condition seems unmendable…purposefully, that is.

Christians may argue they are the exception; they feel a great sense of hope because of belief in Jesus Christ, arriving to our world as the incarnation of God to make a pathway back to God. Alas, Redemption! Closure, right? Yet a cursory survey of believers (even 3 minutes scanning twitter feeds) show they too are rife with the same sorts of problems as Moore, and Jesus hasn’t seemed to fix that for them.

(The particulars of why are widely speculated and even hotly contested. Some call for more faith and prayer, while others osmotically move into greater embracing of “the mysteries”.)

The funny things is, I get Demi. I feel those things too. I wrestle with them, and I’ve taken up the journey to walk through all the rough patches, which are aplenty.

I think it’s high time to bring what it means to be human out it the open.

A kind of unlearning happens as we grow wiser, and the sort of acceptance of our weaknesses may take hold as we become more acquainted with our human condition. Maturity I think it’s called. The “Will we ever get there?” question lingers.

What do you think about Demi’s quote?

Do you relate to her, or do you see things differently?

(by Chris O Brien click for CC source)

You can’t die of a broken heart. It’s despair that kills you.

Having a broken heart, means you are alive. It means that something matters, and you haven’t gone numb (which is what usually happens to people after a while…or escapism, which is sort of the same).

Having a broken heart means that risk was rewarded with pain. But not pain unto death. Pain that gives way to experience you can’t find another way.

I used to think God was trying to kill me of a broken heart. Dashing my hopes and dreams. Allowing my son, or my father, or me to suffer until I couldn’t take it anymore. It felt like the beatings wouldn’t end.

At the end of that bit of brutality (as I perceived it) I realized I could be borne out of it, like a phoenix. And that was the point. To come to a resurrection. On the other side was life, not death. All the scars would be a kind of beauty, not a pitiable shame.

Don’t worry about your broken heart. It has to break apart to get to the fleshy part. The part so tender that only God can hold it…and be the only one who can and will protect it in a way you never could understand before. In a way that you can never do alone. You are brave enough for that. You. are.

Do. not. despair.

editing video...joy?

This December I started interviewing people for this little, fun project (for me) which I call, “Ninja Interviews”.

This was really quite odd actually, because I dislike watching myself on the screen, be it little or big. I bristle at hearing my voice being played back too. See, unlike plenty of the American population I have no desire to be famous. We live in times were people will settle even for infamy to get noticed…but me? Not so much. Celebrity, of any stripe, is fool’s gold, and I am dead panning. I’d prefer it that way.

Nevertheless, I’ve really enjoyed this little project, because I’ve gotten to meet and talk to some wonderful people. Their insights have added a joy to my life. Also, I’ve quickly learned 5 things. Well, actually, 6.

1. I have broken nose.

I broke my nose (what professionals like to call incurring a “deviated septum” thus making it sound almost natural, or at least not ghastly). The first incident happened when I was 10, and got an operation on it. Apparently, it’s not okay—STILL. I must have messed it up again. I can think of quiet a few reasons actually–antics I may reveal at some later time. I sound nasalized, and it’s unappealing in its imperfection. ugh.

2. The camera adds 10-15 pounds…Maybe. I’m overweight, and that’s the other reason.

3. People don’t or won’t “get me”. I’m odd. I know this. Some people will hate. End of Story.

4. I had Bells Palsy in 11th grade. It paralyzed half of my face (Including my muscles and taste buds on the right side of my tongue, my right eyelid, and my lips on the right side too) for 6 weeks. On video, I can tell I didn’t recover 100%. It’s humbling.

5. I nod, blink, and respond…a lot. When I’m in the editing stage it’s a bit freaky and underwhelming in general.

6. I don’t care about any of the above, not for too long anyway. That feels nice. Maybe I’m becoming a grown up.

What have you learned about yourself, lately? Have you been too critical of yourself?

Share your tips for growing out of it.

Mike just went pro, taking his message of hope and inspiration to youth in schools, church, and community groups. In this short video we talk about his message, his new book, and teenagers. Also Mike is not Slim Shady, but he did pimp this Ninja experience.