Lisa Colón DeLay

So, I have this story to tell you…

I enjoy reading blogs. I read dozens regularly, and this summer I stumbled on a discovery that has really changed how my day goes.

I stopped reading cranky bloggers. It sounds simple, right?

Hang in here with me for a moment, because there’s more.

I didn’t set out to read cranky bloggers, but since I’ve subtracted them from my reading diet things have improved in amazing ways.

• For one, I  feel more hopeful on many levels.

• I have more creative energy.

• I can think more clearly about my goals.

• And, best of all I don’t feel so dragged down, overall, you know in that way that’s hard to pinpoint what exactly what could be wrong. You just feel restless or bothered on an emotional subterranean level. 

Granted, lots of cranky bloggers can be interesting, entertaining, or provocative, and I have enjoyed reading them … but I also discovered that more is at stake as I write, create, and interact.

Grouchy people (bloggers or whoever) stifle my creative energy flow:
The fall out comes in terms of…

• problem solving,

• idea generation,

• interpersonal interaction,

• and the resolve to finish ideas all the way through.

It’s all become the higher priority for me rather than staying with the latest controversy or who-done-it tongue wagging.

A captive no more!

So, I unsubscribed to a bunch of writers who were routinely griping or negative. Sadly, I’ve found a number of Christian bloggers had to be cut from my list. They’re just not the cheery bunch you’d expect really. Some of them are quite popular, but oh well. It was a tough decision actually, but a good one…for me. Life-giving really.

I realize that maybe you’re different. Maybe the tit-for-tat cranky bloggers complete with their fiery commenters spark and enthuse your creative Muse. Do they? Maybe it’s their passion gives you a boost that you need to problem solve or unearth new ideas and projects, and carry them out.

But, does it? Really think about it:
After you read a rant post, or someone’s beef or complaint, and the string of ensuing comments, do you feel energized for your own work or creating your own unique art, or do you feel drained?

See, my creative Muse gets peeved. She distances herself from me, it seems. She finds a huff and leaves in it. Maybe out of embarrassment? Maybe out of frustration frustration? Maybe because it’s all so empty to be even a small part of what is ultimately fleeting and hallow. It’s beneath her. ”She”…yeah sure…I suppose that might seem silly to personify my creativity… (and pull a classic Steven Pressfield).

Nevertheless, I just know full well now that a diet of reading that includes grouchiness creates a dead weight I’m not willing to drag along anymore.

Incidentally, I’ve found the same thing holds true regarding viewing cable news shows (humorous, provocative, or otherwise), political pundits, or too many advertisements. Again, that’s my experience. The return on investment (of my time) doesn’t warrant a close tie.

Cynicism puts a machete to the roots of your creative Source. 

Here’s the surprise ending:

Originally, I thought to myself,

“Okay. I’ll just unsubscribe to this and that, and then in the mornings when I read my email I won’t see the latest and I won’t get sucked in to read them. Sure, that’s the ticket. Then I won’t creatively derail. Yeah! I’ll just find them later, or check after a week, and see what I missed, if anything.”

You know what happened?

I didn’t even miss it. I stopped caring about the hype. I hardly ever went back. I stopped wondering if I was missing a controversy or some buzz about the interwebs. It didn’t matter. It was chaff. I just felt better and had more to give. Perhaps I felt “cured” of that honey trap.

TRY THIS:
Try a diet of without cranky bloggers for just one week. Don’t open the email, or unsubscribe for just a week, and see if it makes a difference in your life. See if it increases your ability to be creative and amazing.

I think it will, and I wish you all the best!

Thanks for reading.

I’d love to hear from you on the topic.

Photo Credit: Pulpolux !!! via Compfight

For instance, sometimes I crave and ingest sugar. Sometimes I numb-out with tech, or some distraction. Sometimes I grow irritable and wallow a bit. I could go on and on, but I’ll stop before we both get too embarrassed.

What are some of the neurotic things you do?

I met our next contributor in seminary. If you don’t know Warwick personally, it’s hard to describe him. Just reading his work one could get the false impression that he is just mildly eccentric, even understated. Don’t be fooled.

Warwick leaks out and away from every typical category. First of all, Warwick takes great pleasure in being unusual. He’s involved and conscientious. He makes frenzied gestures when he’s excited, his laugh is thoroughly concussive, and he devours books at vertiginous speed. He’s intense, yet surprises you with his sensitivity. He’s intelligent, but that doesn’t ever seem to help him for long. He’s both a marvel and a conundrum. I like him and I’ve learned a lot from him. Probably when it was least expected, and often where blood, or tears, or sweat has something to do with it. I’ve appreciated Warwick in the same way I grew to like dark lager. (In this curious photo, an unseen doctor checks Warwick for a mutant sty that developed after reading too many spiderman comics. Or, I made that last part up.)

Smart Authors Balance Honesty and Transparency
-by Warwick Fuller

We’ve just moved for the 4^th time in the past year. I just opened a box that was labeled desk stuff and found an old journal.   How I approach my journal is different from my blog.  My blog is mostly about my observations and the events going on in my life that are affecting me and the world around me.  Because of my faith, these observations are thru a certain lens.  I don’t think I’m bashful about that lens, but I am choosy about what I share in regards to that lens.  I’m choosy about what I share about my family.  I do know some of my readers.  I don’t know all of them.

In blogging there are certain ideals, and those that post them well are the people that have a high traffic volume.  Two of those ideals are honesty and transparency.  In being honest, we can see the writer’s flaws, and the true humanity that is behind the words and stories.  In being transparent, the writer becomes relatable.  These are trust issues.  A good author wants you to trust their work; wants you to understand and relate.

Being a smart author in such a personal medium is to know when to draw the line when it comes to transparency.  For me there are a couple of rules that I have employed in my head to help.

1.  Never paint your spouse/child/significant other in such a shade that they are degraded in the eyes of others.  I never want others to regret what I write about them, especially my immediate family.  It’s unfair; they never get to defend themselves on my page.  The stories I do share about them that I question I always run by my wife first.  If she feels uncomfortable then its off the table.
2. Never put your family in danger.  Honestly, there are crazy people out there.  My nana says more than there were when she was a kid.  The post that draws the most attention to my blog is a picture of the Marvel Comic Family Tree (nerd alert), and I’m not sure who is being drawn in because of it.   I am very careful in revealing certain details about where we are and what my kids are up to.  I’m honest, just not naïve.
3. It’s ok to make yourself the butt of a joke, but be redeemable.  Some reputations have been killed by what an author writes about himself on the interwebs.  Some comedians make a life out of self-humiliation.  I think that may be fine for others, but I want to be trusted by those who ask for my advice.  Because of the line of work I am in, others count on my opinion and advice.  I do not want that ruined by a misplaced, though true, story.
4. When in doubt, find a community to run your idea by first.  I have a wife who is understanding and is intelligent.  She also likes me, which helps when I tell her I want to put something on my blog.  She’s god at asking the right questions that help me not just know what to put up but how and why.  If you do not have a soundboard, then find one.  Or at least, write down your post and revisit a week later, before you post it.  This is just a good habit, anyway.
5. Be aware that the truth you find in your observations may not be what others saw.  It’s the old joke about the blind men and the elephant.  If you are writing about an event that took place, it’s not a bad idea to make sure you saw exactly what you saw.  Ask others that were a part of it for their own observations.  It makes a story round, and they can provide details you missed.
6. Don’t make yourself un-hirable.    I have no idea what the future holds for me and my family.  I do not want anything I’ve put up on my blog to put in jeopardy whatever God is leading us to next.  Neither should you.  A good reputation, to be trusted, is a desirable goal. I’ve heard better than silver and gold.  Weigh your words and see if what you read is how you want people to see you.

So, fellow bloggers, how close an eye are you keeping on your words?  What safeguards do you employ?  Can you ever be too honest and open?

Bio: Warwick Fuller is a blogger at www.warwickfuller.wordpress.com.  He names his pets after Anglican literary figures and wears bow ties. He is lead on his church’s Wednesday night Family Ministry, and is a USAR Chaplain.  He is married with three daughters and lives in Harrisburg, PA.  

Ray’s pastoral sensibilities and daily high-quality blog content make him one of my favorites. I’m so glad that he’s our guest contributor today. Ray has some wise words for us, so pay attention. (And BTW Ray, I only use 3 names as my pen name. There are at least two other Lisa DeLays out there, and I owe them the gift of not being associated with my shenanigans!)

Hey, friends, don’t miss other upcoming contributors in this Series. Get the feed burner  email delivery, or the RSS linkup.

The Christian Blogger’s Alchemy
-by Ray Hollenbach

About two years ago a well-known Christian contemporary singer came out as a lesbian. In a moment of what I mistook for inspiration, I wrote 700 words and hit the POST button on my blog. Overnight I received 20-times the page views I normally received. I woke up two days later with the blogger’s equivalent of hangover and the guilt from a one-night stand. My blog is supposed to be about spiritual formation: what did my opinions about someone else’s sexuality have to do with becoming a student of Jesus?

I had discovered Christian blogger’s alchemy: take a red-hot topic, add the name of a famous person (two famous people if you can), and add a sprinkle of holy Jesus words. Mix in Twitter and Facebook, then lean back and check Google Analytics hourly. It was a drunken, orgasmic blogger’s rush. What I didn’t know was that each page view clicked away a little bit of my soul. The new flood of traffic was the mess of pottage for which Esau sold his birthright.

It’s easy. In the past month you needed only write about Trayvon Martin, Mark Driscoll, Westboro Baptist Church, Obamacare in order to achieve mega-blogger status. Just check whatever is trending on Twitter or the Huffington Post, add a few borderline risqué words, a bit of righteous indignation, and heartfelt spirituality. “Heartfelt” is optional.

Lisa Colon Delay, the girl with three names, has given us a gift by starting this series, Spiritual Guidance for Bloggers. Sadly, Richard Foster and Dallas Willard were busy, so you’re stuck with me today. Here is my guidance:

It’s really about you: When we think we are discussing one topic, we are actually discussing another–ourselves. Blogging caters to the powerful urge for self disclosure. That’s why I throw away half of what I write. I’m too ugly, too mean-spirited for general consumption. I need to filter me. If I’m going to be honest, I should drive it home a little deeper: you need to filter you, too.

We would rather examine anyone else’s heart other than our own: Does it strike you odd that we can read one news item about a high-profile Christian celebrity and immediately have the ability to discern the intentions of their heart? This one is a bully, that one is a megalomaniac, and that other one must be called into account at all costs. I would give up my mighty blogging empire to read just one post where a blogger says, “Pastor Moneybags is a jerk, but why am I so upset about it?” Have you ever sent an email to the person you blogged about? How about sending a draft of your post to Pastor Moneybags and ask for his response? Would you be willing to wait for an answer? Deep down, we want others to understand our good intentions–why are we so quick to impugn the heart-intentions of others?

Criticism is easy, praise is hard: Let’s face it: there are plenty of easy targets out there. It says nothing about our marksmanship to shoot at something as big as barn ten feet in front of us. When we read “Love covers a multitude of sins,” have we ever applied Peter’s words to the other guy? Especially the church. Talk about an easy target. The church is filled with hypocrites and idiots. The church is enough to drive God himself crazy. Yet Jesus is passionately in love with the church. Why do we have grace for pagan terrorists and godless child molesters but cannot tolerate the fact that the church is filled with people just like us?

I could go on (I mean really, really go on), but here are a few mini-rants:

Page views don’t mean squat: At last count LMFAO’s Sexy and I Know It had 225 million page views.

The passage you should tape on your computer: Proverbs 10:19

Read Chapter Nine of C.S. Lewis’ Reflection on the Psalms: You can thank me later.

The Hollenbach Twitter commandment: RT others five times more than you promote your own blog.

Most Important: Read http://StudentsofJesus.com every day.

Bio:

Ray, a Chicagoan, writes about faith and culture. He currently lives in central Kentucky, which is filled with faith and culture. You can check out his work at studentsofjesus.com

The 2nd contributor in The Spiritual Guidance for Bloggers Series is author, blogger, and friend of rabbits, Ed Cyzewski.

I’ve enjoyed Ed’s blog and books for years. Simply put, Ed is consistently top notch, and I can’t say that of too many bloggers, even ones I enjoy. His current Women in Ministry Series is giving women who love the Lord a chance to tell their stories in an environment of love, encouragement, and support. Don’t miss it.

Today he shares, with personal candor and razor keenness, a theme that foils many Christian bloggers: polarizing narratives. 

If there was ever a cesspool of troubling ideas about Christianity, it had to be a series of radio shows on this Christian radio station in my home town. Not all of the shows were cesspools mind you—only certain shows.

The cesspools were the shows that revolved around creating an “us vs. them,” barbarians at the gate narrative for Christians and the surrounding culture. The enemies could be liberal politicians, liberal media, and even “liberal” Christians—all terms that were tossed about loosely for anyone who was “dangerous”—whatever that meant.

We live and breathe on narratives. The majority of our narratives revolve around some sort of conflict.

What I’ve found is that I haven’t necessarily abandoned the structure of that old conflict narrative I grew to reject. I still see myself in terms of how I oppose other perspectives when I blog. The difference now is that the barbarians at the gate are the ultra-conservative fundamentalists with oppressive practices and damaging theology.

I still think of myself as somehow preserving true Christianity or the truth—whatever that means. The trouble with this narrative is that once I set myself up as the defender of anything, I’m creating a disingenuous conversation—one that is especially toxic when I tap it out in a blog post.

I’ve run into this conflict dynamic in both directions when I debate people about women in ministry. For those who oppose women in ministry, they often frame the discussion where they’re preserving the truth of scripture. Therefore the entry point for the conversation is that I, as a supporter of women in ministry, am somehow attacking the Bible.

On the other hand, I believe that anyone who denies the full equality of women in the church is denying them their fundamental rights. I can quickly use this to frame my “opponents” as oppressors before the conversation even starts.

Either way, we can create an uneven playing field where neither side can see eye to eye because one side has set itself up on higher ground.

I don’t like confronting perspectives that oppose my own. Nothing has changed in that regard, even if I’ve swapped sides sometimes. Nevertheless, I still like to think of myself as the hero, the one who is standing up for truth.

The reality is that we’re all stumbling around, trying to sort out what we believe and what we should do each day. We’re all over the map, and perhaps some points on the map are closer to the ever elusive truth. However, the topography is quite level. We all go into this with the same limitations and bias.

The world continues to spin even though there are churches who won’t let women pray in the company of men and other churches led by strong, Spirit-filled female pastors. It’s hard to believe some days.

I can still have an equal marriage, even if there are some who believe women must take a subservient position with their husbands.

I can still learn from women, even if women are silenced in some churches.

I can even keep cute and cuddly house rabbits in my living room, even if some people raise them as livestock for dinner.

I wish I could take the high ground. I wish I could be 100% correct. I wish I could judge. I wish I could win. If only I could find that high ground, it would all be so easy. As I shift from one perspective to another, I’ve learned that no one really knows where that impregnable high ground is.

I’m trying to leave the conflict narrative behind. I don’t need more enemies. I need allies. That means I don’t try to convert those who disagree with me into allies. I just try to find allies.

If someone who disagrees with me wants to chat, then I’m all for it. However, I hope to leave behind the high ground days where I roved from one conversation to another as a warrior for truth who defended his supposed high ground no matter what the cost.

Thankfully, God has found the high ground, and he’s not letting me or you anywhere near it. We’re all just stuck on this unending plain together, and the sooner we leave each other be, without incessantly poking every person who disagrees with us, the better.

Ed Cyzewski is the author of Coffeehouse Theology: Reflecting on God in Everyday Life and Divided We Unite: Practical Christian Unity. He blogs at www.inamirrordimly.com. 

Click for Attribution link.

If I were to caption this photo for the project at hand, it would say,
“Sweater cubicle? or are bloggers too isolated for their own spiritual good?”

As I promised on Timothy Dalrymple‘s blog a bit ago, I am covering the topic of spiritual guidance for bloggers (as a series). Thankfully, some talent bloggers are joining us, too.

In plenty of ways technology has outpaced our spiritual reflection. The needed inner gaze at the practice (spiritual or otherwise) of blogging itself has not been encountered effectively. Bloggers have specific spiritual needs and encounter spiritual pitfalls that are under-addressed…even on blogs themselves, where you’d expect them to be handled. Well, no more.

In the next few weeks, I’ll lay this topic out and do just that, with the help of some talented bloggers as featured guest contributors.

For me, it’s an EPIC mashup of blogging experience (since 2006), and three scores of credit hours with my seminary education (M.A. in Religion, Spiritual Formation concentration) cross-fertilizing at the perfect juncture to rock this thing out. Boom. Pow!

For example:
Pitfall #1. Bloggers can be grandiose when introducing a new series.

If you are a blogger, this is especially for you. You and I both need this.

If you know someone who blogs, please send them over. Encourage him or her to read and participate in this series. If they seem reluctant, or just too busy, just say, “See, that’s exactly the whole point!”

A peek at some of the upcoming themes:

• Seductions Specific to Christian Bloggers and What to do About it
• Overcoming the Spiritual Pitfalls of Blogging
• A Writer’s Mistress is a Blog (humor)
• The Best Spiritual Disciplines for Bloggers
• Blogging and Community: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Plus, Articles from fantastic Guest Writers:

- Thom Turner

- Joy Bennet

- Ed Cyzewski

- Anita Mathias

- Jennifer Luitwieler

- Sarah Bessey

- Warwick Fuller

- Ray Hollenbach

…and others.

I had a great chat with Alise Wright and we talked about her upcoming book project Not Afraid. Plus, we talk a bit about a few other things like marriage equality and Mark Driscoll’s new polemic book “Real Marriage” (and I may need to offer some bonus video material on that insightful stuff); can men and women be friends (best of friends, even when they are married to other people); and Alise’s upcoming personal work in keeping with her calling.

I find myself at crossroads…a lot. I’m met with choices, options, and opportunities routinely. Maybe everyone is.

Here are some good questions to ask:

1. Why have I been on the path that I’m on now?

For growth?

For new opportunities?

To “fix something”?

To avoid something?

To learn something?

…it just sorta “happened”…

What else?

(list these)

2. Where am I finding meaning and satisfaction right now?

Is this from something different than I anticipated? Which part is the best fit that I should step into now? What have been the surprises?

3. Is there anything I need to finish before I take a different path?

What might I be tempted to run from, overlook, or avoid instead of deal with? How do I properly conclude this portion of the trip? Have I collected baggage, and if so, what should stay behind? (most of it)

4. What will be some of the challenges this new path will bring?

Since the new path isn’t truly greener, at least not in every way, where will there growing points for me? (places where I’ll be refined) What resistance or obstacles will need to be dealt with? (All whilst knowing that full knowledge of this part is incomplete.)

5. Does this new path lock me into something?

If so, what? And is that beneficial? Are there alternatives once I take this path, if so what? Wiggle room? Where will I need to make sure I fortify my commitment?

Maybe applying these questions to something you’re going through will help you right now. I hope so.

And I could use your help:

When you find yourself at a crossroads, what questions do you ask?

How do you choose the next path?

vintage campfire huddle

I gave up looking at my blog stats for the last 5 days. Now for those of you without blog, this may seem rather insignificant to life, but for bloggers, stats matter. Everyone will tell you that.

How do you know if your site is worth advertising on? Stats. How do you know what posts made a difference? Stats. How do you give yourself that pep talk when you’re feeling like you’re running out of posts that matter? Stats.

Some bloggers check their stats dozens of times per day. They tweet/FB something with a link and then they’ll check to see if that made an impact. They use the words “gay” or “sex” or “scandal” and watch their stats spike. It feels nice. But then they start write to make that happen. I’ve done it too.

Some people abandon their ideas based on their stats as I was surprised to see author and popular blogger Jason Boyett just do. This strikes me as terribly sad.

With inverse proportions, the Content quality goes down as stat checking goes up. Vision and mission are compromised.

It was a spiritual practice for me to stop spying on my stats. My stat stalking was compromising me. It began as an Advent practice actually, but I’m learning from it already. In the same way fasting from food hones focus better on first-things-first priorities, fasting from my stat data worked like that for me. Without checking on them, I can better ask myself the questions: What is the most important thing for me to be thinking about or writing about? What passion must have voice?

My stats may really drop as I ignore them. That’s what usually happens. But, in the process of doing that, I’ll gain a new perceptive on the reasons why I write in the first place. My readers will read the posts that aren’t based on what I think they might enjoy (consumer oriented) but rather I’ll be writing to like-minded readers (tribe cohorts). I’ll be building the trust (and resources) of my “thought posse”. Would Seth Godin would be so proud of me, or what?

But, gosh I want to be popular!

And herein lies the greater good for not feeding that monster. The stat-centric mind set is the proverbial ball and chain for the creative mind. I will venture that it is even spiritually damaging.

Plus! Innovation never comes by adhering to notions of popularity. Changing the world, or even just influencing and benefitting a handful of people, isn’t accomplished by riding trends or gauging what people will like. Plenty of times we don’t want we like until encounter it anyways.

For those reasons, and more, I also just deleted my profile for Klout. I got the impression the wild fluctuations in scores didn’t so much accurately measure my social media influence (which, as I mentioned, I’m trying to put in its proper place) as much get me to regularly push their switch to get my pellet treat. No more.

What about you? Have you given into the pressure to be popular recently?

Please, oh, please God give me the strength to not check my stats on this post about not checking stats.

BIT OF AN UPDATE…I stayed away from the Stat Monster syndrome for about 10 days. Since then, I’ve been looking far less now, and it’s been a boon on many levels.

In my first post, I dropped a “boom post”. This is the 2nd one. So, I guess you could say I’m gonna drop a deuce today. You might hate it. Or you might start to asking better questions of yourself, or get real in a new way. Most of all, I hope you can stick with us, pitch in, and share in the discussion. You are entering a whimp-free zone.

Disclaimers & Circumventing the “Porn is healthy vs. Porn is sin” Territory
Okay. Okay. Now, I realize, plenty of people, Christians included, don’t see much harm in watching some sexual content. Maybe explicit porn, or perhaps something “more vanilla” like maybe just some  sexually voyeuristic program that’s not that “graphic”. Here’s the bad news for you. I am not drawing a distinction in degrees of “porn badness”. I’m lumping. Don’t like it? Take your lumps, okay?

And for you “biblical terms” enthusiasts, you could also be disappointed. I hope your grace is sufficient for me, because I’m committed to not getting bogged down “describing categories and terms” that get people super distracted …the “sin” word… being the big one. This series isn’t the place or time to debate its merits, or squabble over spiritual terminology. (If you wish to do that, good…just go do it on your blog.)

Rather, I am claiming, from the onset, that explicit material is damaging. period. I begin from there. If  this upsets you, or convicts you, then I’m onto something. Let’s go.

This Series…
is to tackle unhealthy habits, or tendencies, we might not want to talk about or admit that we do. Maybe we think it’s better to be polite than truthful. You know, putting on a righteous show…meeting expectations, or at lest managing them. Looking put together. We all know that game. Or, maybe we’re just scared to confess it. Well, no more. Let’s take a direct hit to it. BOOM.

The Goal
Let’s create an atmosphere that will lead us closer to the best God has for us. I refer you to an obvious pick for a guiding verse. Phil. 4:8. (Feel free to submit your own helpful passage, in the comments section.)

STATS
Simply put: The stats are as obvious as they are deplorable. I know, if you’re at your computer, or on your smart phone, that you’ve seen porn, or at the very least, something lewd. Heck an R-rated movie or book is enough. With such easy access, and search engines being how they are, you’ll see it. You have. That’s a given.

But let’s ask the tougher questions: What role does it play in your life? Do you search it out? What does it do rent-free inside your head? When do you “go there”? Do you linger a bit because you think no one will know? How is it hurting you? …because it is. Start Asking Yourself the Tough Questions.

Now, absorb these few stats…
(Even if you don’t view it, someone you know does. So, then I ask you to learn something and try to be helpful.)

* 1 of 3 visitors to all adult websites are women
* 9.4 million women access adult websites every month
Internet Filter Review More info here.

* August 7,2006: 50% of all Christian men and 20% of all Christian women are addicted to pornography. 60% of the women who answered the survey admitted to having significant struggles with lust; 40% admitted to being involved in sexual sin in the past year; and 20% of the church-going female participants struggle with looking at pornography on an ongoing basis.

From the results of a ChristiaNet poll reported by Marketwire.com

The next post in this Series is on the subtle and not-so-subtle triggers for viewing sexual content…in women… (Because that’s my gender status…and they say…”write what you know”. I find this rather inconvenient sometimes, but there you have it.)

But Guys, wait a sec.
Though this issue has been covered a bunch already from the male-use perspective, I hope you will think about the topic for tomorrow and weigh in on your own personal triggers. Because they”ll be different than mine…
or will they?

Here’s today’s question of the day:
When was the last time you purposefully OR accidentally saw something sexually explicit? Are you brave enough to say? I hope so.

For me it was last week.
It’ll happen when I’m doing a truly innocent google search for a blog post visual. Then, boom, up pops something ghastly. Damn you, google! Damn you, indeed. The last time I stayed for a second glance was 11/13/11. How’s that for honest?

So, until next time….
Bounce those eyes, people. Bounce those eyes. (Related link…)

(click image for photo source)

Confession: I recently viewed porn. It’s not the first time.

And so have you.

Porn: noun
1 pornography.
2 television programs, books, etc., regarded as catering to a voyeuristic or obsessive interest in a specified subject.

In this case, it was clips from a primetime television show on NBC, not graphic and explicit sexual content. But, porn has much to do with lacking purity, and self-discipline. I wasn’t interested in either at the time. It doesn’t matter how graphic it was or wasn’t, I picked a path.

I know it’s a common path, so I’m starting a post series on porn, to get the topic out in the open. You’ve seen porn. Of course you have. That’s just simple statistics. The only thing in question is for how long, or how often…but far more importantly, why are you, and are you hiding it, and do you feel stuck or trapped? Well, the gig is up.

7 Reasons this porn stuff is a typical situation:
• Television/especially cable/dish/satillite

• Smart phones/phone with internet access or image viewing capabilities

• Internet…duh. It’s got to be reason # 1. (plenitude of images & privacy to do as one pleases=lack of discipline.)

• Over-Sexualized culture/media, especially in advertising

• Plentiful supply normalizes or excuses inappropriate or damaging behavior/habits.

• Video games/books/products

• Cultural Idolization of beauty, youth, virility, and social acceptance.

We’ll get into the heart of the issue, behaviorally, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, and find some ways to detour this path that will damage us and our relationships. We’ll help each other out, okay?

I will speak from my purview, as a women. We live in a time that is highly visual, tied to fantasy, that supplies huge amounts of voyeuristic material. It’s not something mostly “men do” (look at or participate in). Women do too.

However, I challenge you men reading to cover this topic in the next two weeks in a post or post series, or at least link to this post to support bringing this topic to light.

And ladies reading today, I challenge you to take on this topic, too, not as something that you wish guys wouldn’t do, etc., but as something that somehow effects your life somehow personally, and convicts you to somehow find a better way.

Often “Literature” and Story/Fantasy are like gateway drugs to this type of porn for women…I wrote a bit about this sort of thing in a past article, 5 Reasons I Don’t Read (Christian) Chick Books. 

Confess what trips you up.

Coming up in the next post…thoughts, feelings, and reasons you and I try the Path to Porn.

In later posts, we’ll work together to discover some resources to help and guide us: detours from the path. 

But, here’s the question for today: What particular vehicle makes porn all too accessible for you or someone in your life? Anonymous comments are always welcomed.

Over-sexualized.

Worship songs? No. Everything.

I’ve been both a victim and a participant in the American cultural norm…Scope out opportunities to rejoin comments with, “That’s what she said.”

(To be sure, the phrase was around long before the TV show “The Office”, but a certain Michael Scott character seemed to usher the phrase into a broad and sweeping cultural vernacular. Am I right?)

So now, it seems thousands of words and phrases are hijacked, and church gatherings are not immune to it either. Or, maybe it’s just me. It can be hilarious, dreadful, or just plain embarrassing. Recently, a few worship songs have sort of had their way with me on this, so to speak.

"Bride of Christ" by Marion Coltman (I thought it was entitled: "Jesus, keep your hands where we can see 'em") ...and it's all just a bit too much for me.

I didn’t want to think it at the time, but the Casting Crowns song “Your Love is Extravagant” sounded just a little too much like a “friends with benefits” song. Golly, all you have to do is take the “t” off Christ, and you have a fine mess (in my head):

Your Love is Extravagant

Your love is extravagant
Your friendship, it is intimate
I feel like moving to the rhythm of Your grace
Your fragrance is intoxicating in our secret place
Your love is extravagant

Spread wide in the arms of Christ is the love that covers sin
No greater love have I ever known You considered me a friend
Capture my heart again

Spread wide in the arms of Christ is the love that covers sin
No greater love have I ever known; You considered me a friend

Capture my heart again
Your love is extravagant
Your friendship, it is intimate

Don’t get me wrong, Casting Crowns does so many great worship songs I really enjoy. This may be one your favorites, which is fine. I hope it creates a worshipful experience for you, and for everyone, but I get derailed.

Basically, if a worship song talks about touching, my mind wanders. Such as Kari Jobe song:

I wanna sit at your feet.

Drink from the cup in your hand.

Lay back against you and breathe, here your heart beat

This love is so deep, it’s more than I can stand.

I melt in your peace, it’s overwhelming.

In his blog, Jon Acuff posted recently: How to make an entire audience deaf. It’s a funny and accurate article about how words can ruin an audience’s concentration. So many comments from readers that followed were of amusing and uproarious stories of double entendre and language malfunctions.

The fact is love is risky. God is risky…Obviously risky and risqué has sort of been a fine line in songwriting. But, to be honest, I realize that love can often feel awkward as it gets emotionally deeper. When it starts to change and effect us–and affect us. The awkwardness is part of the path to greater spiritual maturity. (In this case, I’ll let you know for sure when I get there.)

Admittedly, the psalms that King David wrote got quite amatory, and for some it feels embarrassing. I can handle David getting up close and personal with God. I’m fine with Song of Solomon’s sexy talk, and David’s passionate poem songs, but maybe in singing those things corporately, we confront those issues of intimacy differently than we do in our times of personal devotions, songs, or prayers. What do you think about it?

I think the challenge, for me, is a renewing of my mind a bit more, and praying for better ears to hear. Thank you for your patience with me, Lord.

Lastly, for all you songwriters out there, if you’re writing something sweet to sing for Jesus, please–for me–don’t put the words “intimate,” “secret place,” and “rhythm” too close together. (It can be a “worship hijack” for some of us, okay, for me.)

When was the last time you felt embarrassed/awkward at the worst time?

Here’s a collection of posts you may have missed that are worth a read, a second look, or passing glance:

1. On Speaking About Gender:  (A “how to”…in church this has gotten to be a sticky subject.)

2. And this too: (The poster that made me want to be a guy)

3. On Understanding the Bible: (Things you’ll get wrong when you study or read the Bible)

4. Most likely to surprise Evangelicals: Why the Rapture is garbage Doctrine.

5. On modern day Baal Worship: (Does Tech = Baal? Find out.)

6. 5 Mistakes you can make when you’re thinking about ditching your church: 

7. 7 Reasons Why (Christians) Aren’t Ready for Heaven.

8. Faith and Fleecing God: (Some surprising stuff about Gideon)

9. Post with the most puns referring to the word “sharp“. (Called Like Jael, I got you so Pegged) Remember the underdog, tent peg through the head story? Tough sledding for Sunday school teachers, but enough gore to keep the adults happy or guessing. Guessing what? Exactly.

10. Taste the Sensation: The Holy Spirit is (apparently) quite a bit like a York Peppermint Pattie: This self-test will give you the scoop. (humor) I should mention that the most popular humorous self-test on this site is here: Can Your Soul Fit into a Mailbox? Find Out Fast.

11. 7 Reasons Why My Blog Will Make you Cry Less than Jon Acuff’s (humor) blog. 

12. Funniest 18 seconds of video I ever shot:

I probably did a bad job with this…so maybe you can help me. What posts have you liked? You can “nominate” posts for “best of”. Think back, or Do a search, pick your favorites, and share them in the comments section. Thank you for reading.

What to promote your own favorite blog post? Leave a link.

That’s right I said Tripped, not Tricked.

ooo, maybe it’s both. Tripped for Treat…

Rachel Held Evans is hosting an interesting dialogue.

She invited Justin Taylor (author of Between Two Worlds blog) to field questions on the doctrine of Calvinism. Justin is a prominent leader in the contemporary Christian Reformed movement, and has many visitors on his popular blog.

The dialogue that ensues when you talk about predestination and free will can get heated; but more than anything, it seem this exchange at Rachel’s blog is more thoughtful and interesting, than negative or abusive. I do encourage you to read more there, and to whet your appetite…Here is an excerpt:

Question for Justin, from Don:
I do not see how Calvinism does not lead to a kind of fatalism, if what will be will be and cannot be changed, why try to change anything?  Just accept your fate.   When I read Calvinists it seems like they keep trying to explain why their faith is NOT like this, even though from an outsider’s perspective it really IS like this.  So any wisdom you can impart here would help me better understand.

From Justin:
Thanks for asking, Don.

The reason for the pushback you’re getting is that the Bible is opposed to “fatalism” (which makes our actions inconsequential for changing things and leads to resignation in the face of such powerlessness) but teaches and presupposes “compatiblism” (that God’s absolute sovereignty is compatible with genuine human freedom and responsibility).

D. A. Carson explains the biblical both/and:

1. God is absolutely sovereign, but his sovereignty never functions in such a way that human responsibility is curtailed, minimized, or mitigated.

2. Human beings are morally responsible creatures—they significantly choose, rebel, obey, believe, defy, make decisions, and so forth, and they are rightly held accountable for such actions; but this characteristic never functions so as to make God absolutely contingent.

I think we see this both/and approach on nearly every page of Scripture. Just a few examples: Gen. 50:19-20; Lev. 20:7-8; 1 Kings 8:46; Isa. 10:5; John 6:37-40; Acts 18:9-10; Phil. 2:12-13; Acts 4:23-31.

Or if you want just one example to examine, take a careful look at how things play out in this story of Paul being shipwrecked.

For more explanation of how genuine means and consequences function in a world of absolute sovereignty, this imaginary conversation may prove helpful.

I have wondered (until the ideas got so heady that it seemed pointless and too distracting from more important things–like Jesus), how the entrance of sin came into the world, if we are to take the Genesis Garden Story seriously. This idea of forbidden fruit and a human “Fall” (The primeval human couple and their disobedience in paradise that lead to a human sin nature for all their posterity (i.e. “us”), etc.) was really a Fall at all. If God planned for those two humans to Fall, wasn’t he then sort of tripping them?

It’s a bit to wrap one’s mind around, but I welcome your thoughts.

This Sunday is my final lesson in the Route 66 Series (Adventures in Spiritual Formation). I will be reviewing the last 11 weeks (briefly), and then capping it off with an examination of the passage of what has come to be called, The Lord’s Prayer. And we will pray it communally as well. It’s a Christian unity thing.

Do you have any questions or concerns about the Lord’s Prayer?

Here’s a tiny excerpt from a seminary research paper I did of the theology, literary structure, and message of The Lord’s Prayer.

…The Lord’s Prayer comes as the centerpiece in Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7:29) in which Jesus lays out what is vital for citizens in the Kingdom of God. Early in the Christian movement, the practice of saying the Lord’s Prayer before Communion (weekly) and [typically] praying it three times per day is documented. It formed a “token of their identity as Christians,” and was also called, the “prayer of believers”.1

The elements of adoration in The Lord’s Prayer propel us to appreciate God’s immanence and transcendence: a theological fundamental. God is hallowed, his kingdom heavenly, his earthly kingdom is both current and imminent. His kingdom will be forevermore.

The worship and adoration of God is crucial in prayer, and in this Prayer, not just because God is most worthy of it, but because we are spiritually formed by our saying, believing, and embracing those truths. We commune with God, and know him more fully as this reality is further congealed in our minds each time this is lived out.

Theologian Kevin Vanhoover contends that in praying the Lord’s Prayer we together experience our Father, our common sonship, and common our inheritance with Jesus. It is precisely the communal aspect of adoring that helps us to be ordered rightly. Furthermore, Vanhoozer states that when praying in this manner with Jesus, we participate in the family of God, and acknowledge God as Lord, while acknowledging oneself as contingent in the filial relationship made possible by the Son of God and the Spirit of adoption.2

1 Jeremias Joachim, The Prayers of Jesus. Studies in Biblical Theology, Second Series 6 (Naperville, IL: Alec R. Allenson, Inc., 1967), 63, 78.

2 Kevin J. Vanhoozer The Drama of Doctrine: A Canonical Linguistic Approach to Christian Theology (Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press, 2005), 225.

Literary Structure of the Sermon on the Mount (proposal)

Literary structure/pattern and use of the Lord's Prayer Matt. 6:9-15. (proposal)

©Lisa DeLay 2010

Here is the prayer:

The Lord’s Prayer
Matthew 6:9-13 (King James Version)

⁹After this manner therefore pray ye:

Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.

¹⁰Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.

¹¹Give us this day our daily bread.

¹²And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.

¹³And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil:

For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever.

Amen.

Now it’s your turn:
Pick at least one question and respond.

What questions come to mind about the Lord’s Prayer?

When was the last time you said the Lord’s Prayer?

What are your feelings or thoughts about it?

For me, growth can happen through many means. Influence is one, trials are another (but, what a bummer!), and silence is one too (ditto from the last parenthetical sentence).

I’ve been struck lately by reading Richard Foster‘s excellent book on spiritual growth called “Celebration of Discipline” (In its 4 printing, starting in 1978!). One of his great encouragements is to remain silent as we allow God to do our “explaining”.

I have to admit. I’m terrible at silence. I’m a communicator. I say stuff. Plenty of stuff. I’m a writer, a teacher, a parent, a friend, etc. But, ya know, I should shut up more. The temptation to explain our selves and patch up misunderstandings, it seems, can hinder our reliance and dependance on God. Yes, that’s incredibly strange, and sort of hard to hear. But really, we want to fix stuff much too much, am I right? If only we can get in there and makes things right, or fix up a situation, we’ll feel so comforted. It’s a weird little addiction that points to a rather needless futility. We have so little control over how and what others think of us…let alone, the bigger things in our life (health, safety, many circumstances). Let’s be honest.

( I HIGHLY recommend Foster’s book.)

• Do you think Foster has it right?

What are surprising ways that cause growth in you?

Congratulations are in order for NEW ZEALAND, where it is now Sunday. You have survived the apocalypse! Well Done.

The rapture of clothed people

Sometime today, says Harold Camping–a serial End-of-the-World date setter-a massive earthquake will destroy the world. Oh, and the rapture of the saved will happen.

Instead of shredding Camping (this time), I’ll just put this out there:

If you KNEW the world would be ending tonight, would you make amends with anyone? Would you try something you’ve never tried? Would you behave like a better person? Would you give your natural desires free reign?

Most of us are not faced with these sorts of all-or-nothing life decisions. I’m reminded of the stories that came to light after the Titanic disaster. Some became unlikely heros, some reprobates. Some saved lives, and others sacrificed them for their own survival. Some died singing or playing hymns. Some died in bitterness. Some died more peacefully, accepting their fate, and trusting in God’s grace. Stress has a refining way of testing our character.

Consider your “End of the World” desires. Question them. What do they reveal about you? And how can we use this threat of apocalypse to improve ourselves, or be nobler…no matter what happens.

If we’re all here tomorrow… (ugh…whatever) I hope you weigh in with some of the strange or interesting comments you noticed relating to Camping’s dire prediction.

Also: I was amused by this actual (and strangely humorous) interview with Gunther von Harringa, Sr., President of Bible Ministries International conducted by the folks at “The American Jesus” website.

Shhh... tell everybody

What’s the best way to spread news in the Christian community?

That’s easy. Before you share news, just say it’s a prayer request.

(No one likes to feel left out. And for most people knowing and sharing news feels empowering. Cloaked with the term “prayer request” spreading news verges darn near to righteous.)

Even if it’s something horrible, you can say something like, “I probably shouldn’t say this, but, you know Peggy? She’s going through a lot right now. Her teen flipped out and hit her in the face yesterday. It gave her a bloody nose. It’s so sad. Really pray for her. They’re really struggling. Oh, and don’t tell anyone I told you, okay?”

What will happen is that everyone will know, but no one will admit to anything. It will like like the Spirit told them, and suddenly everyone will know everything, but, miraculously, nobody has betrayed any trust.

Peggy? She’ll get weird and awkward glances, and a few close friends will ninja hug her because they’re not sure what else to do, but want to do something overt to show they support her. Peggy will wonder who knows, and how it got out and about.  Smilers and huggers will relieve their guilt from spreading around her business behind her back.

(Yes. This was not a “how-to”…just a bit sarcastic.)

Does this ring true?

Share your input: If someone says, “I probably shouldn’t say this…” what are some good ways to respond?

John 8:31-36 (New Living Translation)

³¹ Jesus said to the people who believed in him, “You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. ³² And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”³³ “But we are descendants of Abraham,” they said. “We have never been slaves to anyone. What do you mean, ‘You will be set free’?”

³⁴ Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave of sin. ³⁵ A slave is not a permanent member of the family, but a son is part of the family forever. ³⁶ So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free.

Response Question: What has God freed you from?

The past week has been a doozie. On Fat Tuesday, no less, I decided to stop having carbohydrates. This includes sugars and starches. This is no easy task. Apparently, I have a bit of an addiction. I’ve never had a good grasp on cutting out sugar for more than 2-3 days.

This week, I also got a head cold, and lost my voice, and hardly have it back now, six days later. And I’ll just stop there, with my woes, because it’ll get too complicated.

At first I felt crazy without my best friend, sugar, and kept craving sweet things: candy, chocolate, cake, pie, bread, you name it. But after 3 days it’s like my body adjusted. I put a tad of frosting in my mouth from my son’s cake, and it wasn’t what I was hoping for. Very surprising.

And I’ve lost 5 lbs. It’s not easy to cut out sugar. Sugar is added to bread, meats, and plenty of things you don’t expect. Plus, I love rice, pasta, and bread…that’s all broken down into sugar….like BOOM. For me, sugar seems to hijack my metabolism and make it really difficult to shed extra pounds. I’ve gotten rounder in the last two years. Too round.

CRAZY STAT I LEARNED
In the U.S. each week, each person ingest 5 pounds of sugar (from various sources). Just read that again. For most of us, it makes us feel awesome for a short bit, with a sugar spike, and then there is a crash type of feeling later. This was worth the ride for me. But I’ve noticed having eggs and other proteins for breakfast keeps me satisfied and stable for about 4 hours, compared with 2 if I have juice or cereal or pancakes at breakfast.

BUT I LOVE SUGAR. The food fantasies were crazy.

This is the season of Lent. I didn’t give up sugar for lent. I haven’t given anything up for lent. I am trying to be more spiritually aware, and this time without sugar during what is also the season of lent, has been the one-two punch for me to stare my cravings in the eye, and not back down. I see that this sweet delight is a kind of poison for me on several levels. It’s sobering.

How does sugar play out in you life?
What sugary things do you like?
Could you give them up? Let Me Know.

First, a confession: I considered posting a photo here of a little person eating a donut hole here. This is to say, posting a visual of “a (so-called) ‘midget’ eating a munchkin®”…because I thought it would funny, a little funny…Yes, in two ways. But, I changed my mind. It just seemed like a bad choice. Some vertically challenged folks mightn’t feel respected. Also, I couldn’t find a good photo.

FAT TUESDAY
Today, March 8th, is my son’s birthday. Today is also Mardi Gras (French for Fat Tuesday). It seemed fitting to send some donut treats for a birthday snack to share with his classmates.

Where I live, Fat Tuesday is celebrated as Fastnacht Day (pronounced: FOSSt-Not) or Donut Day. Potato dough is fried and served with dark corn syrup. After 3 Fastnacht donuts, and you might need assistance to stand or move. Plus, the local Dunkin Donuts shop makes 1,900 dozen donuts on 24 hour shifts just be ready. Don’t mess with donut lovers!

Will you eat a donut today?

The fact is most of us love the indulgence of Fat Tuesday (and other times of feasting), but pay too little attention to the times of simplicity, in the following season. I usually do.

LENT 411
In this particular case, a reflective time is set aside in the Christian calendar following the feasting period. Yes, it’s called the season of Lent. This year, Lent starts Wednesday, March 9th, and ends in the celebration and remembrance of the Resurrection of Jesus Christ (a.k.a Easter Sunday). This year, Easter falls on Sunday, April 24. (To find out the strange way they determine this date each year, go here.)

Why bother concerning yourself with Lenten season?
To show you are devoted to God? Nope. (God already knows your heart.) To please God with sacrifice? Hopefully not, because a pure heart and obedience is better than sacrifice. It’s not about proving something or doing something for God. Instead, a season of Lent can work well to prepare our hearts for God’s work. It can open our eyes to the greater Reality, as well as draw greater significance (for our understanding) in the sacrifice in Jesus Christ’s life of obedience and death for our benefit. This season, can also help us identify with and have compassion for the poor, and the those millions upon millions of humans suffering in our world, which often does not enter our thoughts nearly enough.

This lenten season can be a time of gratitude, and questioning our priorities and cravings.  So, what would happen if you observed the season of Lent in a new way, in some manner, this year? I think you could be pleasantly surprised.

Need an idea?
One thing you can do differently is simply drop by here and pause to read a lenten reflection. Once a week, or more, I will post some Lenten Season reflections to make better use of the season, spiritually speaking. I hope it brings an unexpected blessing to you. So, check back soon, or or sign up for post updates to be notified when a reflection post goes live.

But, first things first–go get a donut!

The face that could launch a thousand mirrors into pieces.

I have to be very honest with all of you today. I’m REALLY struggling.

I’m reeling from some awful news about a man who’s been going to our church. The article is here, but be aware, it makes for horrid reading if you’re a parent, or have a heart for children.

Everyone is heartily nauseated by this series of events, and plenty of people hope he dies, or is tortured, etc. As sick as this makes me, I continue to wonder where redemption and restoration can be found for all involved. What would God have us do? My heart feels broken.

I ask you to stop, right now, and pray for all involved.

Abuses of authority rank at the top of things I loathe, and I’ve seen it in many varieties that I won’t go into right now. I just cannot seem to get a handle on this situation, right now. I couldn’t sleep last night, and I’ve been wondering just how many young people have been hurt by this person, or those like him.

Sadly, the statics are so high, it’s likely there are more abusers that just haven’t been caught, within our fellowship and community–but I pray not. The trouble is, like rape, child molestation is one of the most underreported crimes. The FBI Law Enforcement Bulletin states that only 1-10% are ever disclosed. Please, read that again, and let it sink in.

Kids like my disabled son, and shy children, are prime targets. And hearing about it all, so close to home, makes my blood run cold, and prompts me to action to defend and protect the innocent.

A FEW FAST FACTS that you should know:
• 96% of these types of abusers are male, and the average pedophile knows the victim, and molests 260 victims during their lifetime.

(I’m not trying to condemn a gender, but seriously…what the heck?!)

• All have a fascination with pornography. Please! Read that again. Now, think: how easy is it to get a hold of that, and feed the monster? Rates of abuse are skyrocketing, with no end in site. If you struggle with this issue, and pornography is in your life. Get. help. now.

Pornography is a gateway poison, that leads to a diseased mind and criminality. We need to come forward, and be honest about just how detrimental it is for all sectors of our society.

• The behavior is highly repetitive, to the point of compulsion, rather than resulting from a lack of judgment.

Um. wow.
And here the other fast facts from that source.

For now,

I’m going to channel my energies in this post to opposing and satirizing Dictators, because that’s about all I can do without crying, at the moment. Bullies come in all shapes, sizes, and varieties, but they have the same basic qualities.

My choice today is Muammar Muhammad al-Gaddafi, who’s a bit dim witted. Bullies thrive with creating fear, dictators especially so. When the fear is diminished, hope flourishes; and many will struggle to the death to gain freedom.

Here are 5 Clues Gaddafi could use to extend his life. But, I really hope he never reads this.

1. Realize the importance of shoes. Sure, women, for millennia, have valued shoes, but in the middle east, the bottom of one’s shoe is considered vile. If posters of you are getting whacked with shoes, your time is running out. You are considered lower than dirt, and probably for good reason.

2. Calling Yourself a Martyr Doesn’t seem to hold any sway. When Gaddafi said, “I cannot leave my country, I will die a martyr,” it probably told his opposition he really just “didn’t get it”, right? Or, maybe martyr in Arabic means “fool”.

3. Your Fancy Hats Cease to Charm People. Nothing says coo-coo like a stupid hat worn by a sociopath. This has never been more true. You folks from Reedsville know just what I mean.

4. Your Putting on of Aires is Lamentable. If you pretend you are Lawrence of Arabia and try to imitate his wardrobe, disaster is probably in your future. Really Gaddafi is decades overdue.

5. If your best friends are dictators, the signs look bad. Palling around with other known dictators isn’t just in poor taste, it shows to your “subjects” that you route for the bad guys, which includes yourself. Try to not be retarded, if possible.

Thank you for hanging on with me, and reading this today.
-Lisa

Have you noticed that Honesty is sometimes confused for speaking out in a tactless way? Being “true to our feelings” can reveal the worst parts of ourselves.

Circumstantial Goodness
My goodness (shown in how I think, speak, or act) is too often circumstance or feelings based. Is that true for you? We may treat someone well, if we feel well and good, or if we fear the consequences of skipping out on kindness. Those two things, however, are not goodness or good character sourced from a deeper, formative level. They don’t reveal goodness engrained in our true selves.

FAKING IT?
While, I will not advocate deception, phony pretense, or falsehood, there is something to be said for acting and speaking in a most virtuous way, until our thinking catches up with it. In other words, do the right thing so often that it becomes the new normal for you.

So, it’s actually the idea of acting (living/interacting) from our “best self”, not from a fabrication.

Example:
Say you struggle with keeping a positive attitude: Try putting on a positive attitude until your way of behaving is difficult to separate from who you are…until your thinking changes. ”Wear” a sanguine attitude, until you forget that you’re wearing it, and it becomes an extension of you. Think of it like how you would put on and wear a coat over your regular clothes during cold weather until you feel warm. (For me this would involve a hooded coat.)

Do it until you feel it… or ” option 2 “
I’ve usually advocated the opposite of what I have just said. I’ve thought its best to, “Get your thinking right, and then enact it.” But, you know what? Sometimes we’re just not “there” yet. Sometimes too many circumstances, or unmanageable sentiments block this from happening easily. Now, it seems we can get there from either side, and this, my friends, is good news indeed!

In Christian spiritual formation, we implement practices, concepts, and awareness of that which stimulates Sanctification (a.k.a. the process in which we develop into God-like (Good, like God) people through-in-through. We also consider: “What are God’s qualities?” One that stands out is perfect goodness. This perfect goodness is never based on feelings or circumstances when it’s attributed to God. It simply IS.

Thanks for reading today. I can almost hear the gears moving in your mind, so remember, your comments are welcome.

What can you tell us about feeling/thinking good before doing, or the other way around…doing before we’re feeling it? How does it work for you?

Verse of meditation: Colossians 3:12-14
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

Live on bread...alone?

Here is a selection of some of the Fasting points I discussed, today, with the congregation at Bellegrove Church.

This is NOT an exhaustive study on the topic. If you have experiences or thoughts to share, we could all benefit. Please share here.

Definition: “fasting” verb. abstaining from all or some kinds of food or drink, esp. as a religious observance.

Who are some people who fasted in the Bible?

There were thousands, but here are a few:

• Hannah, Easter, David, Moses, Elijah… (personal fasts, for various reasons)

• People of Nineveh (national repentance)

• Jesus-spiritual discipline (training) preceding life’s work and mission (Matt 4:1-11) —Cool, huh?

Fasting does what?

• It questions our appetites (of every kind).
• It reminds us of Jesus great sacrifice (He give up everything. Leaving out a bit of food IS NOT a big deal, is it?)
• It helps us seek God’s strength for obedient love and service.
• It involves our Motives, not technique (Matt 6:16-18)

(Some things) Fasting is needed for…

• A potent reminder to turn to God.
• A subjection of a base need (food) to see our greater spiritual needs.
• A time of scrutiny of our personal sacrifice to the Lord, and his people.

Fasting is Feasting on God. (Yes, you can read that again.)

It helps us…

• Focus on God, instead of our lack.
• Makes sacred space (for worship, prayer, praise, repentance to our gracious God.
• Experience (through self-denial) God’s goodness and sufficiency. (A.k.a. “We live…not by bread alone” Matt 4:1-11)

to be continued…

(Next time: Some dangers of Fasting, and some benefits of Fasting, and some ideas for Fasting effectively.)

Maybe you haven’t heard of imaginative prayer. Does it sound “woo-woo”?
Woo-woo to you-you seems like doo-doo?
Well, it’s not, unless you have zero imagination. A time of rich prayer using God’s word can inject vitality into an average or stale prayer life.

Here’s how I do it.

I’ve been using the story of Joseph, Genesis 37-50, to aid in my prayer time. As I carefully read and think about the story, I try to climb into it a bit.

I imagine (a.k.a. put my self in the place of a character/s) what it could be like to be sold by family members and taken hundreds of miles away, or be falsely accused and betrayed by the wife of an employer, and waiting helplessly in jail for 2-13 years. Through it all, never giving up on God and his love for me.
I pray with these images, feeling, thoughts, and various associations that strike my heart. I take them to God.

We (me and my Maker) share together in a close intimacy with this amazing reversal-of-fortunes story. I am inspired by Joseph’s story, because it shows my God as unfailing, redeeming unfortunate circumstances, and guiding the Story to his good ends.

Here’s your project.
1. Follow the Genesis link (above), and spend some time with the story. (You can use an old fashion paper Bible too. haha.)
2. Jot down themes, or ideas that come into view.
3. Ask yourself what this story says about God and his character.
4. Pray with your findings. Take them to God. (Don’t expect flashes of divine prophecy, or simple answers to your problems. Just enjoy and live with the themes and the story for a few…moments, hours (or days, depending on how you set to reading and reflecting on this.)

I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Thanks for reading.
May God bless you richly.

-Lisa