Funny Friday: Best Man #FAIL (Wedding Disaster)

You wait for your special day for what seems like an eternity.
You what everything to be just perfect
or you realize that perfection is impossible.

This brief video is basically horrifying as far as “perfect weddings” go…but the only choice for the bride is to have a sense of humor about it.

Why?

There aren’t any options left.
Sure she could be heartbroken, angry, bitter, or embarrassed (or all of the above) but what happened was out of her control and adding drama won’t make anyone feel any better.

Better to admit the humanity of it all, have a good laugh, and make the best of it!

Then, try to have a great party.

(What she did afterward didn’t make it to the footage, but I’d love to know what happened next. Maybe the groom should have jumped in and they could all continue together.

Also, was the aisle buttered of something? CRaZy!

Funny Friday: Worst Day at Work EVER (video)

Not sure if this is a stunt or legit and caught by the security camera. If it’s real, then someone just had a REALLY bad day.

Either way, it’s quite a surprise.

Now that I work with bottles of wine near chairs, I’m hoping this will never be me some night.

Finding Your Purpose: The WISP method (STEP III: “S”)

So, I’ve surprised you with 2 untypical ways to find purpose in your life.

Here (Step 1) and Here (Step 2)

Hopefully, by now you’ve done homework and feel like you are progressing in new ways.

(I’d love to hear about it! Send me a note.)

Now we are on STEP 3

“S”

Service

This one may make little sense to you.

You may think,

“Really? That sounds backwards. I don’t know my purpose yet. I’ll try service once I get that figured out, duh.”

It’s not as backwards as you think.

(Creative Commons photo)
(Creative Commons photo)

What will appeal to us in terms of service is often closely tied to our talents, gifts, and greater purpose.

Here’s an example:

When my kids were very little I made a point of helping my friends prepare for a big, yearly program. Instead of being fulfilling, it was frustrating and felt futile. I realized that my skills and passions were better served elsewhere. This eventually lead to many other types of service that tapped into my greater purpose and held greater meaning for me.

In the beginning, what drew me to help out was a sense of friendship, community, and desire to love and minister to others–to be part of something greater than myself. Those were all things I kept seeking. What I left behind were projects that could miss the forrest for the trees. The experience helped me know when projects were too detail-oriented to be optimally useful in a greater way, for my preferences.

Would I have been able to narrow things down for myself without making this (seeming) mistake? No. And it wasn’t a mistake to help, it was a clarifying exercise.

Would I have been able to decipher what types of service aren’t a good fit for me without this experience? Unlikely.


In serving, something else happens. It’s big and you’ll see the pattern once I mention it:

In losing ourselves we are found.

That means by taking ourselves out of the middle, we can see and choose better and more easily.

(It doesn’t mean thinking less of ourselves, but thinking of ourselves less–by design. Thus, we more expertly “stumble” on to bigger insights.)


In a way, you don’t find your purpose at all, it finds you.

From my perspective, finding God works the same way. You are only lost to yourself, not to God. So you don’t so much “find him” nor does he “find” you. Instead you wake up.

The same holds true for finding your purpose.

We tend to assume, just by default, that finding our purpose must start and end with us. Not so.

Just like Worship, service makes finding your purpose far easier because it becomes a revelatory process. Finding your purpose, like finding happiness, comes as a byproduct of doing other things.


So where can you start with meaningful service that will help you find your purpose?

Here are some categories and qualifiers to explore:

If one stands out as more meaningful, or ignites your passions (which is directly connected to your purpose), try that first. Check with your church, your community, your local schools and organizations, local charities, or just asking around to see what available or sounds like a good fit.

What ever it is, do something. The key on this step in ACTION followed by reflection.

If you are already serving, reevaluate it. It is leading you to a greater purpose or holding you back?

(If you are overly involved in service, then it’s time to scale back.)


HOMEWORK – take some field notes on the following questions:

• Do you like Creating? (What do you like and how do you like to do it?)

• Do you like helping and being useful? In what ways?

•Using your body more than your mind to help out?

OR

Using your mind to help more than your body?
(At the end of the day, which feels more satisfying and why?)

• Do you like being the glue that holds people and projects together?

• Does helping behind the scenes feel meaningful?

• Do you like detail-oriented projects…

OR

Being the visionary that comes up with and starts the project?

• Do you like teaching? (If so, what about it appeals to you?)

• Do people in need ignite your passions?

What about your past service appealed to you and why?

(If you don’t have much past service to serve as a gauge, that’s your biggest obstacle. Start right away. You are much too “in the middle” of your world and you need a break from yourself.)


[You guesses it! This is handy-dandy notebook time! Write out your field notes from the questions above.]

Also consider:
What specific population do you feel drawn to serve?

(It’s okay to specialize and then turn away things that fall outside your scope. This refinement is usually helpful. However, once in a while change it up and serve outside your specific domain–it will surprise you by opening new doors or clarifying your purpose further.)

Types of Populations:
• elderly

• children

• poor

• students

• the needy

• peers

• 20-somethings

• new parents

• the forgotten populations (immigrants, incarcerated, homeless, mentally ill, etc.)

• who else?…


Assess how your TALENTS and SKILLS play into your past service decision.

• What sort of technological knowledge, special skill, unique experience, or centering insight makes certain kinds of service easier?

• What is your “backstory”? Your backstory tends to shift you toward you purpose.

The next step is “P”…come back soon.

Do you know anyone who’s struggling finding purpose, or feels “off-track”? Pass this along!

Save-the-Date: Next Trip to Narnia

Here’s what some of the previous retreat-goers said about the experience:

 

retreafolks

To learn more or sign up, join the Retreat list click HERE.

JESCTR

 

THE STORY…

Suppose you found a place…like Narnia…a magical parallel place…

This happened to me, and the only way it makes sense to tell you about it is to tell you that the land of Narnia comes to mind.

I spotted no White Witch, but I’m certain that Aslan was on the move!

I keep going back and it keeps getting better.

I’ve tried to sketch out something of what it’s like with my words. My strings of syllables are full of adjectives and I start to gush and make a fool of myself.

These words and my intensions fall short. Maybe a photo will help, I think. No, not really.

I try to tell people about it and say “come and join me”. Several of my closest friends knew to trust me and come “in faith” and it turns out that you sort of “catch something” while you’re there that draws you back again and again.

Yes, I can say, it’ll be restful, or I can say, it’ll be refreshing, or life-changing, or amazing…and of course I sound a little crazy because I’m making such a big deal about it.

But, I hope it doesn’t seem so absurd.

When you are really thirsty, water sounds wonderful.

Yet, it’s only when you taste it that you are satisfied.

Maybe you have some kind of deeper thirst. Then come!

 

~ABOUT THIN PLACES~

A “thin place” is where you see this dominion of the kingdom of God come into clearer focus.

And dominion doesn’t refer to a location per se, or sometimes at all.

 

There, the world as you know it grows strangely dimmer and smaller. You notice a threshold that separates heaven and earth too much. It seems much thinner.

This thin place can even be manifest in a person.

When you are near him or her, you sense something greater at work in a richer and more powerful unseen reality. You can’t quite put your finger on it, but you know it’s real. There is weight there.

The epitome of that is, of course, the Son of God. Jesus was the thinnest place of all when he walked among us.He is our model. 

But a thin place is a location too, right?

Yes, sometimes a you sense a thin place in a location that has been somehow, or intentionally, consecrated and set apart for apprehending the deeper realities of existence. A house of worship. A garden. A home where love abides. A bookstore. A mountain perch. A bench at the beach. Everyone has probably felt a thin place, at some point.

(If you have, let me know where in the comments section)

 

The retreat center were I go at least 3-5 times a year is one such thin place. If you haven’t gone to a place like this, it’s nearly impossible to convince you that being there, just being, will improve your life.

I’m left “pitching the benefits” to you, like a giddy salesgirl, because conveying the actual experience is so obtuse and ethereal.

Postcards, paper ones or verbal ones, never really share a place properly. 

I have a plan to return soon
Your story will unfold in new ways there.

I’ll be the guide. I’ll show you the grounds and acquaint you with the places for quiet reflection and rejuvenation, and provide you with some devotional reading and prayer material to guide your time, if you want the structure. I’ll get you started and you’ll have nothing else to do but enjoy yourself. 

Are you thirsty?

We’ll meet for a (provided) hot lunch at 12:30, than after we will “gather the graces” we’ve been given, and leave for home when the time seems right. It could be the half day that changes your life. The cost is a tiny $15.

Let me know if you’re interested by signing up HERE, and I’ll prepare a spot for you and send details.

To be on the update list, click HERE.

Creatives:

planesky.jpg

So, I’ve noticed something:

It’s really common for creative types (musicians, writers, artists, filmmakers, etc) to get into a serious funk, especially come Autumn season. Whether it’s the chilly weather, the shorter periods of daylight, the pre-holiday blitz, or whatever else…plenty of us hit up against FUNK.

I’m not talking about catchy music (Funk as in…Soul music with a greater emphasis on beats, influences from rhythm and bluesjazz and psychedelic rock). No, I’m talking about the feeling that something is wrong in the universe.

I was all up in a funk when I read an article from Tim Ferriss. If this successful Mr Moneybags type who’s arguably America’s favorite life hacker gets hit up with a phase of Funk, why should I think it’s strange for me to splash into one. I started listening and looking around, and it turns out it’s “a thing”.

Perhaps it comes out as cynicism, annoyance, restlessness, or ennui.

 

en·nui

  [ahn-wee, ahn-wee; French ahn-nwee]  

noun

a feeling of utter weariness and discontent
resulting from satiety or lack of interest; 
boredom: 
The endless lecture produced an unbearable ennui.

(ennui isn’t mere boredom though, the connotation is really more of a life-weariness…a “funk”)

Maybe it’s just low-grade blah or maybe it’s full-blown depressive feelings.
Whatever it is, it’s common. You are not alone.

 

We have to push through. Yes, Winter will be long, but we can use the time to germinate our ideas and bloom in a few months.
If you’re feeling the onslaught of FALL FUNK let me know!
We’ll check up on each other. We’ll un-funk-ify!