Soul School – Lesson 20 – The Most Common Mistake About Beliefs

QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT:
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EXTRAS:
DID YOU KNOW….that if you enjoy this episode, you can get A LOT more for about $1.
This episode of Soul School, just like every Wednesday episode of Soul School, now comes with extra material that really enhances what you’ve heard and goes into other topics too. If you want to learn more and go deeper, don’t miss out. I’ve created a specific video class to watch and a really useful worksheet that includes reflection questions for you. You can also meet with me for 15 minutes per month to talk about anything you’d like from Soul School.

• This is subscription-based access called Varsity Club. It’s only $5, each month (and yes, you can chip in more than that, if you’d like). You get access to all the extras I’ve created starting at Lesson 18 and onward; then get every single week after that. You can cancel any time. Sign up here and get access right now.


TODAY:
Today’s episode is about the crucial difference between belief and values/virtues and also the common mistake most of us assume about beliefs and identity.

I’m happy to hear your thoughts on the topic too. Let me know what you think about it.

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JOIN ME THURSDAY, February 25 (2016) -8pm ET for a free class on Renewal and Homecoming HERE. Get info or Sign up now, right here

Are you Skipping “Brain Pain” but picking the Plague?

Fingertips

Professor Bop via Compfight

Most of us don’t realize that we spend a bunch of time avoiding a familiar “Brain Pain”.

Just below our radar, but deeply connected with our emotions is an unsettling sense that something isn’t right.

That’s because it isn’t. Though it’s a normal sensation it’s not well-received.

We order and reorder things to avoid this feeling. But, it persists. And, it’ll make us do the strangest things.

Simply put: This “brain pain” happens when we try to hold two or more conflicting ideas together.

It’s officially called cognitive dissonance.

Unidentified, you don’t like it either.

But, in fact most of life and love is full of paradox and contradictions. All the great thinkers and spiritual masters speak of it.

The big problem?

Our cognitions don’t live together in a good jive and comfortable harmony. Our ideas, beliefs, values or emotional reactions have pointy and mismatched edges and we keep wanting things to piece together nicely like a glossy jigsaw puzzle.

Instead of feeling and living with dissonance, we try to avoid it or reduce it. Anything from changing our beliefs to be in keeping with the situation (to make it bearable), to reducing our regret through irrational justification, to reaffirming our bias even if a logical reason is absent. We are very irrational creatures and the more we think we are NOT the more irrational it is.

(It’s dissonant to be a partially rational creature, see?)

In wanting everything to “make sense” we pick fiction and live by figments instead.

You do it. I do it.

What’s worse?
The social pressure to relieve this sort of brain pain will blast toward us from everywhere. Maybe nowhere more powerfully than from our leaders. People in the pulpit, or the podium, power players in the board room or on news and media outlets they let the zingers fly that force you to inconsistently choice a faulty form of consistency. On cable television and radio of all stripes it’s a full-blown-plauge.

Everyone will try to sway you to give up the dissonance and see it their way (which they call “the right way”). It makes them feel better. But, the dissonance is part of reality just like it is part of jazz music. Not every note sounds just right or fits together seamlessly. It’s off-pitch and off-tempo. It’s very hard to predict.

How tricky! How disconcerting.

It is a mark of maturity to accept that reality is chock-a-block with inconsistency and incongruence. (That’s worth reading again.)

Though it can be unnerving, an abiding peace can yet remain in what seems a spongy place. This place is a good and useful tension of balance. It’s very hard to find and even harder to keep.

So, what about you?

Think about the things that create the discomforting feeling of dissonance for you.

• What are they? (relationships, finances, politics, tragedy, redemption?) Narrow it down to one or two big ones, for now.

• Have you been dodging logic or minimizing regret for the fantasy of consonance because you want to avoid the pain (and reality) of dissonance? Let’s be honest.

What could you hold in dissonance and balance that you haven’t been?

(Thank you for reading today. I would love if if you would share this post. Also great? If you would sign up for the next post in the sidebar.)

xo

-Lisa

“Is Mark Driscoll a Cult Leader?” (Infographic)

In the last post I talked about the qualities of a cult, or a group that has social decay (some cult-like qualities). I got some questions, such as: “So, are you implying that Mark Driscoll is a cult leader?”

Gosh… that’s awkward. Instead of making a pronouncement, I’ll let you judge for yourself.

I made this handy info graphic to make the whole thing easier to understand. Enjoy.

Cool bonus. This image may be shared. Official Creative Commons license of this work. 

 

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"Stuff Christians Like" -Jon Acuff (Receives coveted Liger Endorsement)

I just love this book!

When best-selling Blue Like Jazz (by Donald Miller) came out, lots of Christians ooed and awed about how insightful, witty, and clever Don was. I liked the book, a lot actually. But still, I couldn’t help feeling like hmm, how did this happen? Don has a knack for writing a funny memoir–and lucky for him, it was slightly before he could be reprimanded for making it sound–basically–like a blog. That’s all well and good, but, is it the funny we all crave? Not exactly. Is he super funny? Will his wit make you pee your pants?

Well, I conducted test after test, on a full bladder, and found that, no, a hefty chortle was pretty much the maximum laugh for my buck (about $13.) Don’t get me wrong, I think Don’s great. He’s great in a lumpy, comfortable, wingman with baggage kind of way. That’s fine. We all need our projects. One of mine is pitying him, and I also like to see what he’s up to next, because it’s usually interesting. I just like the guy.

But then here comes Jon Acuff. He’s a whole different species. If you compare Robin Williams to former supreme court judge, Sandra Day O’Connor, you’ll start to get an idea of what I mean about just how incomparably fun, whacky, and talented Jon is. Sandra, you’re fine, but don’t try too hard, ok? Don, pace yourself, you’ll be just fine.

So, I pre-oreder Jon’s “Stuff Christians Like” book (for under 8$) assuming it couldn’t meet up with all the hype. But it TOTALLY did! I won’t go into the testing process with too much detail, but I’ll just say, sometimes I read it while using the bathroom. (It’s a two birds with one stone kind of thing.)

My mascot/partner and I have developed a new ratings system for all epically wonderful things, and Jon’s book (which includes his blog from whence it came) is now quality-tested, and officially approved.

Jon Acuff's "Stuff Christians Like" earns 95% + approval rating!

What could get 100% Liger Approval you might be thinking? I don’t mind the question, actually.

Maybe the Bible? Or the Book of Common Prayer? No, apparently they wouldn’t. I don’t exactly know what Liger’s like. They are strange creatures with hopes, dreams, and moods I have no way of understanding.

It’s a rather vague system. However I can tell you Blue Like Jazz got 88.4 %, so that should tell you something.

Hope you get to read Jon’s book soon. Tell us what you think. That will be what it’s truly like… when the doves cry.

(If you didn’t read the book, that last part won’t be hysterical, and you’re probably going to feel left out. I’m – Sorry. Though I care about how you feel, I don’t make the rules about how you may or may not react emotionally to this sort of thing. Don Miller used to say, “Buying something makes you feel new.” Yes, he may have meant “new” in a false sense. But you’ll never know until you buy Jon’s book, now will you?)

Cheers!

;)