Tag: Spiritual Guidance for bloggers

5 Ways Blogging is Like a Mistress (for a writer)


 

(click for photo attribution)

 

WARNING: The following contains dark humor.

I know something about mistresses. My dad had one.

As a writer, a blog can be just like a mistress for me. Here’s why:

1. Stroking. The instant gratification that comes from being heard with such ease (blogging) is the simple sticky honey trap for a person of words, like me.

2. Quick fix over Commitment? Sure, baby. Pounding out 80,000 words grows wearisome. Why not just pop out 800, for a quick fix? Sometimes, I ditch the old ball & chain writing project for a bit of Miss Right Now (blogging). Sometimes my dreams suffer for it.

3. On-the-fly modification. Meeting up with a mistress (my blog) can be exciting because not only can I be impetuous, but I can modify a lot to my liking whenever I please. I switch things up for added interest, or improvement.  But, ink on paper…I’m married to it.

4. Familiarity breeds contempt. There’s nothing like living with your words to make them frustrating and lack-luster. Months on end of book project writing can just kill the romance, and lead to self-loathing at my own impotence. However, a short, hot rendezvous (a few hours) is the most I spend on any post. Hey, blog, don’t let me catch you leaving your toothbrush here, or it’s sayonara.

5. Adventure! Weekend trysts to exotic spots? Yes, please! I don’t have to be an expert when blogging. I can cover exciting, far-flung topics with just a few hours of pesky research.

My dad married his mistress, eventually. He still fought with wife #1 (my mom) all the time–but with the new wife, it was a new life of eggshell walking and apologizing. He probably didn’t anticipate this at the mistress stage.

I don’t think I want the same thing in terms of my writing. I have to keep blogging in check. The words, “Get back, you vile temptress!” comes to mind, until I realize that this would make it sound like it wasn’t my fault. But, it is.

Has your blog ever been like a “mistress” for you? In what ways?

And please share your insights.
What helps you stay on track with longer writing projects?

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Luke’s Tweets from the Sermon on the Sofa

click for photo attribution

 

This shaggy Jewish guy, Jay, who hangs out at the local coffeehouse tells some great stories, and a lot of people like to listen to him. People seem attracted to Jay, but not because he’s good looking or in with the shop owners. Smelly homeless guys, hookers, meth-addicts, weirdos, gang bangers, and lesbians are some of his best friends, much to the dismay of the local business owners who like hipsters with disposable income, and chic, classy professionals to patronize their businesses.

Would you believe his guy doesn’t even have his own phone? A “groupie” gave him a Tracfone once to help him out. When it ran out of minutes, he never got it refilled. He gave it to his friend Mary, who was down on her luck, along with a 20 he said he found near the river. Truthfully, he didn’t call on it most of the time. Plenty of people called him though, about all kinds of problems, and so his minutes drained pretty quickly. He doesn’t seem to get bothered by not having a phone. (Honestly, I don’t get that.)

There’s one story about the coffeehouse being super crowded one day. Everybody was hot, and there was no AC running. Maybe it broke. Everybody wanted iced coffee like crazy, and nothing in the shop was working right.

So, out of nowhere Jay says he’ll take care of it. He tells his friends to dole out pitchers of the stuff. It’s like it comes out of nowhere. Iced Coffee for everybody. Plus, muffins, and cookies, and organic quiche. There were actually so many leftovers that they had 12 trays piled high afterwards. Talk about weird.

Here’s another odd thing. Jay doesn’t have his own blog either. However, four of his friends write about him a lot at their blogs. Well, I think others do too, but those four have the most visitor traffic…I’ll put it that way.

His one friend Luke–who’s kind of OCD–tweets stuff he says. I think there might even be a category on Luke’s blog that is a collection of Jay’s tweets. It’s called something like…Sermon on the Sofa…or something like that. It’s full of this subtle subversive stuff, that if you co-opt with it, it could change everything. Everything.

Another tweet of Jay’s thoughts really stuck with me. It read:

“What’s the point if a person gains the whole blogosphere and loses her own soul?”

You know when you hear something, and it sounds like it’s just for you? That’s kind of how it felt when I heard it. I favorited that one.