1. Shun Meaningful Relationships
- The problem with interpersonal intimacy is that it diminishes one’s ability to hone self-centeredness. Once others start to matter you sometimes have to take them into consideration. Two Words, people: Lone Wolf.
2. Don’t Get Married/Stay Married
- One of the first things you learn, and then continue to learn repeatedly through the years, is that marriage puts your selfishness under a looming, bright, hot spotlight. There is no need to build those skills of negotiating compromise, because unfettered selfishness is crucial to consistently getting what you want.
3. Don’t Be A Good Parent
- From birth children are needy. Constantly, one must put his children’s welfare ahead of his own. Even one’s ambitious and preferences routinely are relegated to second priority, or much worse. All this practice of deferring weakens you, so you hardly ever get whatever you want. I’ve seen this happen a ton of times.
4. Don’t Commit to People or Ideals
- Believing in something, or being loyal, severely compromises your abilities to get whatever you want. One minute you’re doing something nice for someone, or some cause, and the next minute your going well out of your way. Talk about getting derailed!
5. Don’t Grow Compassionate
- As people elicit your pity, or draws you into some sort of endearment, it lights the fuse on the bomb that will eventually explode your efforts to get whatever you want.
If you can avoid all these trappings, you will probably grow expert at getting whatever you want. Of course don’t expect anyone to like it, or like you. As a kind of plague to those in your world, you will continue to seek meaning, but only find it rarely; and even then it will be fleetingly.
Have you been harmed selfishness?
My former wife of 15 years is exactly as described above. After years of serving her and treating her like a princess, I have had enough when her selfishness brought on self destructing damaging behaviors to herself and our relationship.
(Saw your post on 4HB btw)
Thanks Jim for your comment. That sounds deeply painful.
…. and Thank you, Tim Ferris, for sending Jim!