One of the most helpful writers for me in understanding God’s heart, and healing from wounds inflicted by other Christians, has been Philip Yancey.
I’m offering a wonderful book by him about seeing God through the life and ministry of Jesus called, The Jesus I Never Knew. This is a great giveaway!
What an eye-opening book this was for me, and a great blessing. To win a (new) copy, and the other goodies shown, guess the number of pretzels in the ziplock shown in the photo below. The first one to guess correctly wins, or the one to come the closest first.
Prize: Yancey book, coffee, and disposable tooth cleaners!
I’ve been enjoying Chad’s blog, and social media shout outs for a while now; so I was quite excited, when this busy guy agreed to guest post here. It’s a joy for me to share things with readers here, including people.
Chad Estes
Chad is a legend. Even “Biblical Learning Blog” (at http://www.biblecollege.org) included his blog, Captain’s Blog, in their list of Top 50 Ecumenical Blogs. So, it’s really an honor to have him here.
When I asked if he would be a guest blogger, Chad mentioned that wanted to share his heart, and I hope you soak in his contribution.
Leave your comments, afterwards, and show him what a polite readership I am fortunate enough to have by visiting his site, and to say “thank you.”
Chad, Thank you!
I Want You to Want Me
-Chad Estes
What we learned on the schoolyard playground seems to hold true in life. Those with the mad skills are the ones in demand. Those who can’t keep their eye on the ball, or catch an easy pop fly are picked to play right field and bat at the end of the order. This peer rejection is like the sting of a wasp, and unless you get off the field, you will probably get hurt by the same stinger, over and over again.
Adults play this same game. We want to team up with those people who benefit us, and help us win. We do this in business and in social circles. We even do this in church. Those on the outside of our margins–because of divorce, financial status, education levels, or addictive behavior issues, maynot be the first ones invited to our home fellowships. It isn’t their children that we invite to spend the night with our children.
But actually my thoughts about rejection aren’t about being picked last; it is the rejection that comes from being picked first.
What?
Yes, there is also a rejection issue with being picked first on a team because, more often than not, you are being picked for what you can do instead of who you are.
This is acceptable as long as you can keep up with the performance levels, but if your stats ever start to stumble, so will your value to the team.
It would be nice if this didn’t happen in Christian circles but unfortunately, it does.
Many churches and ministries recruit to a position based on a person’s perceived contribution value (Do they have good speaking skills? Can they lead a team? Do they agree with my direction? Will they serve this vision?) like it was written on stone tablets. But, when recruiting is all based on performance there will be a day when those skills will slip, or someone, even more qualified will come along. And when our positions are challenged, we may resort to some sort of spiritual steroids to help keep us on the field of play. The bad thing is these unnatural growth hormones actually stunt spiritual development It’s a cheap trick.
Today, I had a meeting where I was being recruited because of my ministry skills. But, as I drove home, I realized I was actually feeling the sting of rejection even though I’d been offered a position. The recruiter wasn’t really interested in me as much as she was interested in what I could do for her. She doesn’t really know me, nor does she know my heart. And unfortunately with her priorities all about her vision, she never will take the time to know what my heart is about. And so though it is a heady offer, it is a path that leads to performing, pretending, and pain.
My real value is my heart, not my skills. The skills are deteriorating with age. My heart is in the process of being renewed.
What I really want out of this life is to be picked by someone to be on their team, or be their friend not, because I’m a good player, or that I fit a niche, but simply because they want to be with me.
How about you?
Which rejection hurts you more—the kind from not being included, or the kind from being selected for performance-based reasons?
What do you suggest are ways to build relationships outside of these judgments and expectations?
(PLEASE note: Not shown in the picture, but also part of the prize -chocolate-)
Shown here is a fantastic book by Becky Garrison-Oh, and it’s autographed! (See how to get this awesome prize below!)
A fitting prize combo!
Here’s a book synopsis from Powell Books:
A challenge has been issued on matters of faith and Becky Garrison meets it head on in this witty yet poignant answer to the Anti-God gurus Richard Dawkins, Sam Harris, and Daniel Dennett.
Becky Garrison, religious satirist and senior contributing editor for “The Wittenberg Door,” is taking a stand. Where most Christians assume the character of the Cowardly Lion chanting, “I do believe, I do believe, I do believe,” Garrison refuses to simply thrust tracts at these self-proclaimed infidels.
Instead, Garrison steels her pen and takes on the ungodly program of the New Atheists, skewering each argument with her sharp satiric wit. Garrison turns aside the atheists’ assault without ignoring its real criticisms, namely, the church’s inadequate response to war, evolution, medical ethics, social justice, and other important issues in the post-9/11 world.
This from Becky:
I penned The New Atheist Crusaders and Their Unholy Grail at the request of Thomas Nelson, who wanted a satirical response to a select group of best selling authors, who in my view seemed to be behaving as badly as their fundamentalist counterparts. Both sides presented a black and white view of the world that reduced centuries of Christian and scientific thinking into easily digestible and often inaccurate soundbites. Such exchanges may make for entertaining cable news programming but they fail to present an faithful depiction of the Christian faith.
Since the publication of this book I’ve have the privilege of dialoguing with thoughtful freethinkers in my discussions with people like Greg Epstein, author of Good without God (http://www.harvardhumanist.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=1&Itemid=30) and the Purple State of Mind (http://www.purplestateofmind.com) guys, as well as contributing regularly to Religion Dispatches (http://www.religiondispatches.org) and Killing the Buddha (http://killingthebuddha.com). I’ve found a group of folks, who decry the excesses of religious empires that threaten to demolish the wall separating church from state by siding with my ancestor Roger Williams, who coined the term “soul liberty” to denote the freedom of all to believe according to their own conscience. In addition, we acknowledge that religion and science can live in harmony without producing some faith based pseudo-science or a scientific world consists of cold hard facts that’s totally devoid of meaning. Also, we tend to roll our eyes at the latest biblical brands du jour albeit evangelical, prosperity gospel, power progressive, emergent, or New Monasticism that end up marketing certain missional mavericks as though they were the Messiah instead of following the living Christ.
What we share in common is a quest to explore what we share in common with our shared humanity in the hopes of addressing many of the concerns facing our world. My hope is that we can turn down the white noise of the New Atheists and then tune in to each other.
How can you get this great prize?
Becky thought this one up herself. This is her photo. Give it a caption. One winner will be picked.
Also-if you have questions about the book, or for Becky, leave them here, and she’ll reply. Fun, huh?
Awkward sign from Becky's trip to Canterbury Cathedral
I have added a 2ND OPTION for you non poets. See below!
A tasty selection of the world's best coffees
This is prize # 4.
Ever try Kona /Arabic coffee, or coffee from Kenya, Sumatra, or Guatemala? Now is your chance. This delicious 1.87 lb coffee set can be yours, or be mailed to the coffee lover of your choice
To get this big ticket goodie will require some effort to win. But, listen! It is not hard.
You may write one, or post one and give the author full credit. This handy site even creates them for you, in a snap. How simple, and perfect. You can probably almost smell the coffee now!
What is a cinquain, you ask? Fourth grade was so long ago!
The modern cinquain is based on a word count of words of a certain type, in 5 lines.
This is the formula:
line 1 – one word (noun) a title or name of the subject
line 2 – two words (adjectives) describing the title
line 3 – three words (verbs) describing an action related to the title
line 4 – four words describing a feeling about the title, a complete sentence
line 5 – one word referring back to the title of the poem
OPTION 2
List 4 – 7 describing words (also known as adjectives) detailing WHY you like coffee. (Extra points for creativity)
Thursday Feb. 11 at 7pm, (EST) is the deadline. Each person may enter TWICE.
And-hey-Be kind, let your coffee-loving friends know about where they can get some coffee lovin’!
O God, who wonderfully created, and yet more wonderfully restored, the dignity of human nature: Grant that we may share the divine life of him who humbled himself to share our humanity, your Son Jesus Christ; who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit , one God, for ever and ever. -Amen.
