(The best part about Teresa’s article to me? The various mentions of not wearing pants. It’s just always funny.)
Teresa Shourds writes a very funny blog and I love how she handles this review which could have been awkward seeing as she is not fond of dogs. gulp.
Can a non-“dog person” enjoy the book I wrote with Doug Jackson? Read on and see!
EXCERPT:
Doug asked if I would take a gander and review, you know since I’m a fellow writer and all.
Specifically, he thought it would be an interesting perspective “coming from a person who is ahem – less than enthusiastic about dogs (per a recent blog)”. I’m assuming he means this blog.
He’s right.
I’m not a dog person, or an animal person really.
I don’t torture them. I’ve learned over the years to add that clarification because once you’ve acknowledged counter cultural feelings concerning pets – people go to dark places… immediately.
I’ll watch your cat sleeping on great dane video – once.
Past that – I’m out. I don’t like messiness, germ-i-ness, destruction or poop.
I have no affinity for the idea of Spot roaming freely throughout the house taking liberties with shoes, table legs, rugs and the trash in the bathroom. I really don’t want you sitting on my furniture – YOU HAVE NO PANTS ON. Plus I’m pretty sure you drank out of the toilet. Oh, and please stop licking my leg… I saw what you licked prior.
Will he feel nice on your neck? Creepy crawlies give some the heebie jeebies!
Heebie Jeebies is similar to the British term “Screaming Habdabs,” a phrase which I am quite fond of. You got to love it! If I used it, however, not too many would understand me in the place with my greatest readership-the USA. Both are non sense rhyming phrases used to describe a feeling of anxiety or apprehension, or worse.
Lots of things can bring them on. Perhaps, later, you can contribute a few situations that give you the heebie jeebies. For now, try this self-test to see if you are highly susceptible to their onset. HAVE FUN!
DIRECTIONS:
Answer each with one of the following-
A. Rarely or Never True.
B. Sometimes True.
C. Mostly or Always True
Keep track of your answers!
1. The thought of drinking unidentified, or identified “floaters” in your beverage gives you a weird taste in your mouth, or funny feeling in your stomach (and you won’t do it.)
2. Using a stranger’s chapstick is unreasonable.
3. The licking of fingers in public drives you to distraction.
4. You can envision the horrid (potential) consequences of sending food back when you dine out.
5. Anything with more legs than you should be regarded with suspicion.
6. Smells like Patchouli, Musk, incense, and funky grandma’s basement induce a foreboding atmosphere for you.
7. You have the general belief that most bad things happen after dark.
8. You have checked under your bed, in your closet, or shower for security reasons.
9. If it weren’t for the creepy music, plenty of movies wouldn’t be so freakin’ scary.
10. Snakes are unexplainably weird or creepy.
SCORING:
A. answers = 1 point
B. answers = 3 points
C. answers = 5 points
• If you got 35-50 points, you are a heebie jeebie type, and very susceptible. Future posts written here will be of great help to you. For now, build your confidence with baby steps, venture out within groups, and work on your “control issues.” Just saying…
• 20-35 points indicates a moderate susceptibility for the heebie jeebies. The range is fairly normal, and only once in a while will you have a full blown attack of the screaming habdabs. It is quite likely that you associate with “Full-On Habdaders,” so stay informed, send them this way to educate themselves, and learn all you can to support them. Future posts will be of assistance.
• 10-20 points indicates a resistance to the heebie jeebies, which often can point toward inner strength, maturity, or a rational mind. More often however, it signals denial and a shut off emotional life were barriers have been erected to keep things out, including love. If this erection lasts more than four hours, consult your doctor, counselor or pastor. It is a sorry state indeed. There will be additional information for this part of the heebie jeebie spectrum too, so come back within the next ten days. For now, find small ways to open up, let your guard down, or not be so uptight. In the long run, the benefits will outweigh the risks and downsides.
NOW- it’s YOUR turn.
Tell us what gives you the Heebie Jeebies?
I’ll set up a poll with the most common answers, and put it to a vote for most heebie jeebyish.
Anything odd habdab you have to admit?
(fear of puppies maybe?)
If you had fun, there are several other “similar” self-tests at this site. Search the categories at the bottom of the page for “self-test,” and enjoy!
