Essay on Youth

Some of my thoughts on youth, now that it’s in the rear view mirror.

Youth: a chronic condition that ends in time.

CC file found here
teen star (CC file found here)

The stage of Youth: A time characterized by excitement, worry, hope, fear, misplaced confidence, and options (plenty of which are set to expire).

Nothing breathes fresh air into a situation like an eager youth ready to learn, try, fail, and keep trying. It inspires the younger ones and rallies the older ones.

Nothing is more endearing than a youth who prizes earlier generations and lacks the blinding hubris typical to the stage of the development.

and to the god of our age….Youth, Oh the beauty of it. Personified, Venus, her name. (Youthful Beauty…or what nearly every commercial directed at females is about.)

Like a baby unblemished and without scars, youth displays itself on the young like a pillar of potential, a stack of dreams and promises, shinning and magnificent, and frozen for just that moment in time. Though what youth feels this truly? Youth is a self-deluding time: The stage seems expansive when you are in it, and experience can’t bear this out differently because of the great lack of it.

Sustaining this impossibility of sustained youth, this age of supposed perfection becomes the futile and bitter plight for too many. And the fight for it is nonsensical.

Youth is a stage to be enjoyed and then left behind like outgrown clothes, once pristine, but all-too-soon ill-fitting and inappropriate for the rest of the voyage. Ballet slippers are shed for work boots.

How true that Youthful beauty is but one kind. Though who knows this?

By being convinced that beauty has a pinnacle (age 21?) too may rue the loss of this exterior sort of it–never realizing the false conception is not based on much more than societal conventions and symmetry…but it sells a lot of face cream, doesn’t it?

Yes, the flower of spring is glorious (youth indeed), but the whole plant, or tree, is the greater thing. An oak, a tower in homage to resilience, humanity in the full, of which youthful can never assail, let alone master.

The joy and glory of youth is the promise of accomplishment. Like graduation ceremonies and semi-finals matches.

Though what youth sees it this way?

And what about the resentment of youth by the no longer young?
Maybe it stems from the regret of the energy and options lost. The verve the youths possess can seem enviable. Though they (youth) don’t know it, their blatant inexperience and lack of wisdom, from the outside, seems pitiful, just like the weakness and lethargy of advanced years seem like that to the youth.

“What a young fool,” says the man.

“What a tired and bitter old man,” says the youth.

Both under-estimated.

And back to confidence.

Youthful confidence rests in that accomplishments are assured with effort and willingness. (Though it seems different to them sometimes. For them, confidence may rest mainly in feeling the power of mind and body so fully.)

This confidence is often shattered or dismantled within a decade because of the slings and arrows of life. But occasionally not, and never for the narcissist.

Sickness, financial strain, mishaps, circumstances, failure, and the most debilitating – early success – strip out the potency of youthful confidence. With persistence and determination this is replaced by the better things:

  • stability of character
  • the resolution of will 
  • fortitude of spirit

But, best of all: the of acquisition compassion necessary for the species to survive, or even–sometimes– thrive.

(Oh, that it is empathic compassion, not pity, is the impetus for acts of goodness.)

And what of maturity of the youth? 

A mature youth is only mature compared to his peers or the fools of older generations.

And for good reason. Maturity is a gift, not a certainty. It comes through time, but also by Grace, just as youth and health come. Though who knows this?

A “mature youth” is usually an oxymoronic attribute, as genuine maturity involves accumulating wisdom.

Maturity and wisdom come through testing and testing by the passage of time well-lived and the battles of life well-tested.

Youthful maturity is then only the bud of it which, if it is there at all, is necessarily nestled in humility (knowing well, or in some good manner, the terrible disadvantage of inexperience).

In the end, the unknown exists for all, but the degrees and varieties of it change as time passes and aging happens. Both exciting and terrifying–needing courage and inner strength.

It goes in stages from

“What will I become?”

to

“What will become of me, and us all?”

 

To Receive Love, Prepare your heart

servingcookiesI’m been thinking a lot about how we come into knowing we are Beloved of God. When and if we can absorb that simple but huge concept and step into it, we tend to feel excited to share that reality, spread the love and help others get in on such good stuff!

How do we do it?

Here’s what I found….It’s impossible to make someone receive love or to make them know they are loved, just as much as it’s hard to receive love when we don’t feel ready. It can’t feel forced. It’s part mental ascent and part experiential, and our experiential baggage gets in the way! We can’t still be cynical and mistrusting to actually feel loved. It’s a leap. Right off the cliff toward Love.

You think you’ll die a brutal death, until you do it. Then you realize you have been able to fly on the breeze of God’s love the whole time, and just never got there.

So, I don’t have a good answer to how it works have someone receive your love, but I do know that we put ourselves in a place to be transformed and healed by preparing our heart to offer love freely. We decide that the pain won’t outweigh the gift. The reward. 

Can we be betrayed? Yes.

Can we get hurt? Yes.

But we can’t offer much if we can’t offer ourselves, wide open. We can’t love others when we are not equipped to receive love. When we are hedging our bets or playing it safe. Or, and this is the surprise…we can’t feel more loved by over-giving.

BUT over-givers try this, anyway. Is this you? You give and give and give. You serve and help and meet needs, but because you are not ready to receive an emptiness starts to seep in. Then, maybe resentment. Then maybe bitterness and cynicism. The spirit closes.

It’s because love and service given isn’t and hasn’t truly been freely given. It’s been given in hopes of something…it’s changed to be some sort of bargain or  potential transaction. It’s some sort of agreement known or unknown that wagers “if I give enough I will be given to. I will feel Love. I will receive and be filled.”

No. It can’t happen this sort of way.

The challenge is to do the radical renovation of tearing the walls down. Prepare to receive.

Now, what would this look like for you? Share your ideas.

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image found here: aledocofc.blogspot.com