Smart Authors Balance Honesty and Transparency [Guest post by Warwick Fuller]

I met our next contributor in seminary. If you don’t know Warwick personally, it’s hard to describe him. Just reading his work one could get the false impression that he is just mildly eccentric, even understated. Don’t be fooled.

Warwick leaks out and away from every typical category. First of all, Warwick takes great pleasure in being unusual. He’s involved and conscientious. He makes frenzied gestures when he’s excited, his laugh is thoroughly concussive, and he devours books at vertiginous speed. He’s intense, yet surprises you with his sensitivity. He’s intelligent, but that doesn’t ever seem to help him for long. He’s both a marvel and a conundrum. I like him and I’ve learned a lot from him. Probably when it was least expected, and often where blood, or tears, or sweat has something to do with it. I’ve appreciated Warwick in the same way I grew to like dark lager. (In this curious photo, an unseen doctor checks Warwick for a mutant sty that developed after reading too many spiderman comics. Or, I made that last part up.)

Smart Authors Balance Honesty and Transparency
-by Warwick Fuller

We’ve just moved for the 4th time in the past year. I just opened a box that was labeled desk stuff and found an old journal.   How I approach my journal is different from my blog.  My blog is mostly about my observations and the events going on in my life that are affecting me and the world around me.  Because of my faith, these observations are thru a certain lens.  I don’t think I’m bashful about that lens, but I am choosy about what I share in regards to that lens.  I’m choosy about what I share about my family.  I do know some of my readers.  I don’t know all of them.

In blogging there are certain ideals, and those that post them well are the people that have a high traffic volume.  Two of those ideals are honesty and transparency.  In being honest, we can see the writer’s flaws, and the true humanity that is behind the words and stories.  In being transparent, the writer becomes relatable.  These are trust issues.  A good author wants you to trust their work; wants you to understand and relate.

Being a smart author in such a personal medium is to know when to draw the line when it comes to transparency.  For me there are a couple of rules that I have employed in my head to help.

  1.  Never paint your spouse/child/significant other in such a shade that they are degraded in the eyes of others.  I never want others to regret what I write about them, especially my immediate family.  It’s unfair; they never get to defend themselves on my page.  The stories I do share about them that I question I always run by my wife first.  If she feels uncomfortable then its off the table.
  2. Never put your family in danger.  Honestly, there are crazy people out there.  My nana says more than there were when she was a kid.  The post that draws the most attention to my blog is a picture of the Marvel Comic Family Tree (nerd alert), and I’m not sure who is being drawn in because of it.   I am very careful in revealing certain details about where we are and what my kids are up to.  I’m honest, just not naïve.
  3. It’s ok to make yourself the butt of a joke, but be redeemable.  Some reputations have been killed by what an author writes about himself on the interwebs.  Some comedians make a life out of self-humiliation.  I think that may be fine for others, but I want to be trusted by those who ask for my advice.  Because of the line of work I am in, others count on my opinion and advice.  I do not want that ruined by a misplaced, though true, story.
  4. When in doubt, find a community to run your idea by first.  I have a wife who is understanding and is intelligent.  She also likes me, which helps when I tell her I want to put something on my blog.  She’s god at asking the right questions that help me not just know what to put up but how and why.  If you do not have a soundboard, then find one.  Or at least, write down your post and revisit a week later, before you post it.  This is just a good habit, anyway.
  5. Be aware that the truth you find in your observations may not be what others saw.  It’s the old joke about the blind men and the elephant.  If you are writing about an event that took place, it’s not a bad idea to make sure you saw exactly what you saw.  Ask others that were a part of it for their own observations.  It makes a story round, and they can provide details you missed.
  6. Don’t make yourself un-hirable.    I have no idea what the future holds for me and my family.  I do not want anything I’ve put up on my blog to put in jeopardy whatever God is leading us to next.  Neither should you.  A good reputation, to be trusted, is a desirable goal. I’ve heard better than silver and gold.  Weigh your words and see if what you read is how you want people to see you.

So, fellow bloggers, how close an eye are you keeping on your words?  What safeguards do you employ?  Can you ever be too honest and open?

Bio: Warwick Fuller is a blogger at www.warwickfuller.wordpress.com.  He names his pets after Anglican literary figures and wears bow ties. He is lead on his church’s Wednesday night Family Ministry, and is a USAR Chaplain.  He is married with three daughters and lives in Harrisburg, PA.  

Once upon a Niche…

Sometimes you find your niche. Sometimes a niche presents itself. And sometimes you get a bit of both and it feels like Paris in Springtime, which smells great and involves kissing (and I’ll just save that bit for some other post, or my dairy).

Finding one’s niche includes a merging of ingredients:

• Perparation

• Passion

• Education

• Opportunity

You put it all together and you make it with an “m” (for mission)

And you get patty cake instead of hokey pokey.

My niche is now helping and encouraging Creators and Communicators.

People who feel put on the planet to create things or communicate important things.

Have you found your niche yet?

Or would you like some encouragement or direction?

I’ve creating new resources for just that thing.

 

Tell us what you like to focus on or Leave a link so we can find your niche.

What is Blogger Generosity? [And 7 Things Giving Does]

Gift
Photo Credit: asenat29 via Compfight

After the April Fool’s prank of telling our congregation that he and his wife were expecting a baby, our paster spoke on the topic of generosity.

I wasn’t fooled because I had previous insider information that “that ship had sailed,” as his wife once put it. So, you bet ‘cha…Mark’s no freighter. He’s strictly a Pleasure Cruiser now. 

He said there are 2 types of people in the word: Givers and Takers. Which one are you?

I thought about this. I thought, I sure hope I’m a giver, and not a jerky taker. 

Then I thought, Everyone must think this.

Then I thought, Hang on a minute, it just can’t be this binary. Sometimes, I give and sometimes I take. Hum. but which do I do more?…Then I felt hungry for barbecue. Whatever.

But, it’s a splendid thing to think about just in case we’re getting too grabby.

Mark said, these 7 things happen when we are givers–When we are generous people.

1. It creates community

2. It defeats materialism

3. It strengthens my fiath

4. It is an eternal investment

5. I get blessed in return

6. It produces contentment

7. It makes more like God (who’s incredibly generous)

Then, I thought, This is a good message for bloggers, too. Really, communicators of any kind. It’s time to get this to the blog.

We can forget this stuff about generosity. We can fail to make our lives, and our online lives generous, simply by not really thinking about it.

I’ve noticed that Jeff Goins is a blogger and writer who is a giver. He’s a big proponent of generosity in the blogging arena (it’s an “arena” right?). He walks the talk, and his blog and platform have truly reaped the rewards.

Who do you think is generous online?

Share your ideas about how we can be more giving online.

Carry out some generosity today. Ask yourself, “How will I be a giver?”

I’ll kick it off. Here’s a new way that I’m being more generous. I added 51 photos to Flikr. They are all free-use with attribution* (Creative Commons). Just click here. (Many more will be added.)

 

*To clarify what that means, it’s this: You are free and clear to use any image there, no charge, anywhere, if you give me credit (my full name and/or a link is fine) and don’t alter it, or make a profit from it. (Something like I did in this post with the gift picture.)

Focus on the Raisin, Grasshopper [Guest Post from Jennifer Luitwieler]

Thanks for stopping by. All the articles in this series can be found by clicking the #4Bloggers tab above. Don’t miss new contribution by a host of talented people all of March and April…get the RSS feed or feedburner email delivery. (The icons are over yonder to the right.)

I’m so happy that Jennifer Luitwieler (a.k.a. JLu <JAY-loo>) is a part of this series. Enjoy her contribution, ’cause it has shiny, raisiny goodness!

Focus on the Raisin, Grasshopper

I can’t be the only blogger who busies her little, under-used brain with the large readership of other, far cooler, infinitely more talented blog-keepers out there. On any given day, I’m like a newborn baby, at the mercy of unsophisticated muscles, clicking link after distracting link. Every flash in my periphery forces a jerky turn of my head: Oooh! Shiny!

Just last week, I dragged another writer down my little rabbit hole, concerning myself with a third writer’s blog, a huge machine of success. I dashed off emails of indignation. I fretted about my voice and my readership. I was all in a huff about so-and-so; the volume of comments, the internet buzz about the writing, the name-dropping. My value, in my eyes, dropped lower and lower and lower.

Then, I remembered the raisin.

As young, dumb parents, we lived according the prophets as written in What To Expect Your Baby’s First Year. They promised that our delightful child prodigy would be able to focus on a raisin. Our child, genius that she was—and is— did not disappoint. She focused the heck out of that raisin. I mean that kid held the shriveled fruit in her bright, blue-eyed gaze with laser focus. She saw that raisin and she knew that raisin.

A newborn baby, sweet little mewling blob, cannot control her eyes or arms. She is at the mercy of her reflexes, guided by little more than hunger and comfort. But as she grows, she develops. Synapses fire, allowing her to do new things, like focus on a raisin. Make no mistake, it is hard to focus on a raisin, yo.

When I dragged my friend into my blogger drama, I lacked laser-raisin-ninja focus. Let’s face it: Raisins are kinda “meh” in the midst of so many LOLcats. Instead of concentrating on developing the readership we DO have, the voice we CAN use, we fiddle around with a sort of blogger’s performance continuum.

It starts with hits and includes such esoteric measurables as readership, click-throughs, and shares. We count subscribers with the fervor of a money lender. We click REFRESH like an addict until our fingers bleed, craving the warm buzz of recognition. The knowledge that we are being read (or not) can provide either an overblown sense of self importance or a slightly pleasurable self-loathing. We bow to the arbitrary curve of the almighty Googlestats bell.

Truth is, my faith life is not much different. I am easily distracted by things that don’t matter, drawn into endless (pointless) debates, fretting over my importance in the larger Kingdom. I begin my prayer time anticipating a relational communique; before too long, I’m thinking, “I forgot to take the chicken out of the freezer.” Instead of proudly using the gifts He’s given me, I worry about how others are using theirs.

Fortunately, my Master has a ton of patience and a generous sense of humor. Besides, he put a developing brain in my thick skull, and a softening heart in my core. Paying attention to the raisin, the seemingly boring things like discipline, grace, and faith pays dividends in my faith, in my writing, and in my relationships. It’s not sexy. It’s not always fun, but the raisin is power, baby. The raisin is power. •

Jennifer Luitwieler wrangles The Dog, a cat and 3 perfect angels who adore her and find her to be the best homeschool teacher ever in the universe. When she is not filling their spongelike brains with limitless knowledge, she wrangles ideas into sentences with an imaginary golden lasso. (Of course it’s imaginary. No one has a real golden lasso.) She writes on crafts and sports in monthly columns. Her first book, “Run With Me: An Accidental Runner and the Power of the Poo,” was released in 2011. You can find her at http://jenniferluitwieler.com, on twitter @jenluit and Facebook.com/jenluitwieler

5 Ways Blogging is Like a Mistress (for a writer)


 

(click for photo attribution)

 

WARNING: The following contains dark humor.

I know something about mistresses. My dad had one.

As a writer, a blog can be just like a mistress for me. Here’s why:

1. Stroking. The instant gratification that comes from being heard with such ease (blogging) is the simple sticky honey trap for a person of words, like me.

2. Quick fix over Commitment? Sure, baby. Pounding out 80,000 words grows wearisome. Why not just pop out 800, for a quick fix? Sometimes, I ditch the old ball & chain writing project for a bit of Miss Right Now (blogging). Sometimes my dreams suffer for it.

3. On-the-fly modification. Meeting up with a mistress (my blog) can be exciting because not only can I be impetuous, but I can modify a lot to my liking whenever I please. I switch things up for added interest, or improvement.  But, ink on paper…I’m married to it.

4. Familiarity breeds contempt. There’s nothing like living with your words to make them frustrating and lack-luster. Months on end of book project writing can just kill the romance, and lead to self-loathing at my own impotence. However, a short, hot rendezvous (a few hours) is the most I spend on any post. Hey, blog, don’t let me catch you leaving your toothbrush here, or it’s sayonara.

5. Adventure! Weekend trysts to exotic spots? Yes, please! I don’t have to be an expert when blogging. I can cover exciting, far-flung topics with just a few hours of pesky research.

My dad married his mistress, eventually. He still fought with wife #1 (my mom) all the time–but with the new wife, it was a new life of eggshell walking and apologizing. He probably didn’t anticipate this at the mistress stage.

I don’t think I want the same thing in terms of my writing. I have to keep blogging in check. The words, “Get back, you vile temptress!” comes to mind, until I realize that this would make it sound like it wasn’t my fault. But, it is.

Has your blog ever been like a “mistress” for you? In what ways?

And please share your insights.
What helps you stay on track with longer writing projects?

More good stuff is in the works, so don’t miss a thing. Sign up for the RSS feed, or updates to your email (with Feedburner). Button icons on the upper right are for that. Thanks for being here today, and sharing the love with retweet goodness, if you can.