Eating is important. Funny stuff here.
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Humor Series: Funny to Whom?
Have you heard this one?
Three Humor Science researchers walk into a bar. ….um. Wait. That won’t work. Let me start over.
Get a scientist to talk about humor studies and you get a quick reminder of how science can squeeze the life out of anything.
Dissection is destructive. But no more!
It’s time to find out in a better way:
1. What do people find funny and why?
2. How can YOU become more humorously winsome?
3. How can science and an understanding of human nature and spirituality help us find out?
That’s what this series will be about, and I promise that it won’t be as dull as it’s been when scientists have the mic.
If it’s successful, a long form project will go a lot further and get a lot funnier. That’s up to you.
Here’s the story of how it all started:
A friend of mine asked me to speak at a senior residential home on the topic of community. No problem. I speak at plenty of places on plenty of topics. I wrote my bullet points and picked out an outfit…and then things went bad.
The problem?
I didn’t know she was billing me as “hilarious”.
I found that part out only a few days beforehand. I went into a quiet panic. The kind where your hands get clammy and your sweat smells like bad coffee. You run out of TUMS at times like this.
I’d planned on being friendly and informative, not uproarious. I was going to present material and involve them in cute bonding activities, not split their sides in gales of laughter. My friend had been walking around assuring residents that I was the funniest thing going.
Now what?
Maybe, I could stick a joke in there somewhere:
“Have you ever peed your pants laughing? What a silly question–you’re old people. You peed your pants getting out of bed today. Is bladder incontinence a laughing matter? …Depends.”
Depends is right. This wasn’t going to work.
What if they hated me? Some of them are in chronic pain. Some are grouchy. Some have little patience for sassy youngsters. These people carry canes and some smell like pee.
I could get the beating of my life! And I would deserve it.
The terror of bombing at the place drove me to research the topic of humor scientifically.
My purpose was to help these folks have a good time, not offend them.
What resulted was a quest and many discoveries. I had to find out if funniness can be learned, if public speaking can be improved with a formula, if laughter can be predicted, and if old people laugh at jokes about physical deterioration and, if so, under what conditions.
Well, it turns out the last bit is sort of tricky. More on that in future material.
On getting funnier
My research dug up a very good find and it might help you too:
One of the ways almost anyone can get funnier to more people is to appear harmless more broadly.
Does that seem counter-intuitive?
Yes, there are foul-mouthed, raunchy comics aplenty and seem to get lots of laughs, but they are not typically funny to the greatest numbers of people compared to plenty of other things (pies in the face, mistaken identity antics, prat falls, kittens jumping in surprise), and there is a scientific reason why.
What more people (on average) actually find funny hinges on giving them something that is funny at a further comedic distance. This explains why Jay Leno, Jerry Seinfeld, and Bill Cosby (before all that drugging women stuff was found out) have huge followings and continued success, and Roseanne Barr gets more annoying as time goes by.
What is Comedic Distance?
Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.
-Mel Brooks
In this quote, Mel Brooks underscores what humor researchers are finding empirically true. Distance matters a lot.
If your child falls off the playground slide and bangs himself up, it’s scary. If some man in a cowboy hat suddenly gets kicked in the crotch by an aggressive llama, it’s laughable.
The Kitten vs. Stern Proof
This is why videos of kittens doing silly things trump in spades the popularity of Howard Stern and his radio show antics. The hoards of memes, shares, and overall fans of funny kitten videos means that invariably, kittens kick Howard’s butt. Big time. Kittens won’t squash your dearly held values. Kittens won’t say something gross about bodily fluids. (Kittens are not funny to everyone, but they are funnier on the whole than a raunchy DJ or vulgar comedian. No contest.)
The difference between kittens and Howard Stern is this: Something “dangerous” isn’t personally threatening when kittens are involved.
Comedic distance (whether physical, chronological, or emotional) creates an amusing incident. The surprise pays off and people are thusly amused. If not, that you can get booed.
For me, I played off that my normal Thursday afternoons are spend with prison inmates and that I was REALLY happy for the upgrade.
I was then heckled by a woman who said,
“Don’t be so sure.” (She has it in for a few of her neighbors. It’s been ugly.)
To which I replied, “Well, you are all much better dressed.”
Resounding laughter. A win!
So, see if you can figure out why the photo above is funny (to most people)?
Answer:
The woman has made it to 100 years old and she’s done it her way.
Sure, smoking is dangerous, but apparently not much, in her case.
Having fun?
I hope you are enjoying this series.
Do you have questions about humor theory or getting funnier?
Let me know.
xo
-Lisa
Here are the previous articles in this series:
1. Finding things funny…from birth
2. Humor Studies: Step 1 – Tickle Rats
For the latest info on my humor related projects sign up here.
Protected: Finding your Purpose: Part IV “P” (The WISP Method)
Growth can Start with Shame
I’ve noticed that every time I take a new or risky step, the first thing that I experience is discomfort.
Later it coagulates as Shame.
So, if, say… I’m going to take on something now, or write about something close to my heart that, haven’t shared before, or extend myself in a way that feels out of my expertise or depth… I’ll feel weirdly yucky and vulnerable, and than shameful.
I’ll think, “No one will care about this, don’t be a fool.”
or I’ll think, “You will be mocked. Don’t do step out on this.”
or I’ll think, “How can I do this so it doesn’t feel so risky?”
Just beyond those moments are moments of greatest growth and authenticity.
Defining moments.
Fear is wrestled and vanquished.
We stand on the precipice sometimes not knowing which way to go…onward or backward.
If it’s starting to scare the stink out of you, you’re doing it right. You’re pointed in the proper direction.
If you feel like running, hiding, or chickening out, then, good: you’re about to grow.
Keep going.
Do the thing you feel most vulnerable doing that you’ve been hoping for down deep: It’s the idea you just can’t shake but it scares you silly.
Lent is a great time to wrestle with all this stuff and the Resurrection celebration later becomes that more precious.
Here is a Scripture meditation for you today:
The “Don’t Do This” Phenomenon
“Don’t kick elephants!”
If you are like most people you are thinking of elephants right now, and you weren’t 30 seconds ago.
You might even be wondering what would happen if you did kick an elephant.
Yes?
There is a certain psychology around how things get to the top of the mind.
We get the wrong results when we don’t understand it.
As a marketing consultant I’ve learned to adjust for it, but it’s still a challenge to remember.
We all can bear it in mind.
For instance, as parents we can learn that…
When we call direct attention to something that is not “top of the mind” we make it “top of the mind” unintentionally and can get the worst results imagined.
Not true if we allow the person to come to a conclusion through their own mental process.
One of the best ways to do that is by asking a (literally) thought-provoking question instead of giving an edict.
So for the child who kicks things…
Prior to the situation we can ask…
What sorts of things happen if we kick someone hard?
It may help boost empathy too.
Here are other 5 lessons about “top of the mind”:
- Being blatant can be a barrier to being effective.
- You can mention what you don’t want, sometimes, to incite certain thoughts.
- The uniqueness of the statement sometimes carries more weight than the call-to-action.
- Hidden influences can steer us the wrong way.
- Emotion can often trump directness.
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Be an “elephant and never forget” the good stuff you learned here today.
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MMM!