(reader response) Doing what you don't want to do

WomenPrayingCouch

 

Here is a response from Veronica:

I’m glad to come to your site, and start thinking more seriously about my own spiritual growth. I want to keep it in the front of my mind. Well, I guess you could say, I want to “make the main thing the Main Thing.” Wasn’t that a catch phrase once?  I get together with a friend to pray, and keep accountable spiritually. Last week we started talking about having trouble with doing the things we are trying so hard not to do. Really, it’s like how Paul says it in Romans-

Romans 7:19 “I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway.”

For me, it’s pride. As I start to work on it, I basically get puffed up as I feel I have a handle on it. I catch myself in false modesty with others too. So, really it’s a step backwards. I’m doing what I don’t want to do.

For my friend, she says she struggles with keeping on a good face for show, or pretense. She feels like a fake. She says the more she tries to not put up a front, the more she feels that is exactly what is happening. She is even more conscious of herself, and in the end is more phony. Maybe it has to do with self absorption. Do other people feel this way? Do you have any suggestions? 

Thanks for allowing me to post this Veronica. I can’t say with 100% certainty, but I think what you reveal is quite a common situation. And perhaps you’re right. We might be worse off as we focus on our problem (as you say, self-absorption) rather than pour our adoration into God, follow him, and really turn to him and trust him to make us more like him. Doing what we don’t want to do proves our desperate need for total dependency on God. The more we struggle to do better, the more we’ll find we come up short. I believe relinquishing our control of our own sanctification process (the development of our godly character) is something that is necessary to have freedom, enjoy God’s love, and progress toward the likeness of our Redeemer. It isn’t something we can ever manage, or do well our selves. For me, it is a continual surrendering/yielding process where I humble my will, and heart to God, and give God the timetable for my character restoration, as I recommit to participate fully in his process. (It has to be continual, because I don’t do well for very long!)

Anybody else have suggestions for Veronica?

Hi Jon's friends from SCL

I love you
I love you

If you’re visiting because of Jon’s Stuff Christians Like blog. I welcome you!

If not, um this might get a little awkward. (I’m trying to woo new readers, so talk amongst your selves for a sec., k?)

Anyway, I think Jon is  a rock star. And by that, I don’t mean that he just has his mind on drugs, violence, sex, and music with a throbbing beat. I mean, I think he’s highly funny, clever, poignant, and says all the right stuff, so you can’t help but to really like him, for just being him.

If you enjoy him, you probably have a vivacious sense of humor. Perfect. Please look around, comment on posts, and know that I’m pretty much, wishing on a star that you’ll come back and read things here again soon. (I had put in here “kissing your buttocks,” but I thought that sounded needy and cheap. So, I took it out. I suppose I have to draw the line somewhere.)

I post 4 times per week, or more, so please drop by soon. One fun post I recommend to visit here, is the quiz that can determine if your soul can fit into a mailbox. Check that out. (You can do a search in the sidebar, when you scroll to the bottom of this page.) It’s a bad Cosmo Quiz meets a Christianity Today mini-article sort of thing. And golly, it’s cleared up a lot for soul-searching types of people so far.

Thank you for coming to visit. I feel like we’re practically best friends at this point-almost like we known each other for just years and years!

(Is this coming on too strong? Do you feel smothered? Well, you know, come by soon, we’ll talk. Or I can call you maybe. Or is that’s too much, too soon? Sorry. I’m being forward now. Right. You can…you know, just call me, I guess. I love you. Give me a call. Or, you know, whatever makes you feel comfortable. No pressure. Except… I just love you SO much. xoxo.)

Why does embrace mean so much?

When I first saw this video below, I cried. [youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4]

It showed me the power of offering connection and love. The largely untapped, healing power of embrace–which connotes acceptance–seems to be too absent today. The distance between us grows, even though technology has supposedly drawn us together.

Luke 15:20 “So he returned home to his father. And while he was still a long way off, his father saw him coming. Filled with love and compassion, he ran to his son, embraced him, and kissed him.”

If you would, please response here, and explain your feelings about embrace, or any reactions you had to this post, the video, or the artwork. Thank you.

An idea for plumbing deeper:

Your challenge-

Bring these pictures to mind the next time you pray, and speak about them to God, honestly. If you have fears, joy, sorrow, gratitude, or other feelings, express them, using this theme as a vehicle to interact in your next intimate time with the Lover of your soul.

Transforming Nebula

The Hubble telescope is operating again, and got gorgeous photos of the Minkowski 2-9, also called, the Butterfly Nebula. Quite gorgeous, right? It fills me with awe.

090909-hubble-ngc6302-02

I thought this was a great symbol of transformation, process, and creation rolled up into an unfathomable, beautiful, and yes, nebulous package. We’re all works in progress. In the past, Hubble never capture this image so well, but through the corrected lens we are able to see the beauty of an organic wonder. I see the parallel for our lives in this. Correcting our perspective, can do wonders for our outlook on our lives, and progress too.

What do you think of this photo?

What transformation do you seek, ultimately?

Leave any comments you’d like.

My Top 5 Reasons/signs you may be burned out on church

1. You find yourself thinking up illnesses that would suffice for excuses for staying home. Sometimes you even invent names like Snufflititus or Schnozatigo: The serious redness and inflammation of the area beneath the nose from too much tissue rubbing. Rx Coffee, remote control, rest, snacks, and tissues with lotion built-in.

2. You suddenly realize how cool, smart, and savvy the early Sunday morning tv shows are, and feel like you might be getting a raw deal but missing them.

3. You feel deeply offended that your church doesn’t care too much that the coffee offered tastes something like armpit, and you start to identify this characteristic with an inherent spiritual problem of your congregation. (perhaps the misusing of the gift of hospitality) 

4. You start to pick apart the pastor’s sermon with a graph, and two columns of hatch marks on your church bulletin, adding up the times he is substituting a self-aggrandizing story instead of using a true parable to teach a point.

5. You find getting tapped for nursery duty a welcomed relief, because you won’t really have to talk to anybody, watch a worship performance you won’t enjoy, or try to not yawn an ungodly amount of times as you try to get through a sermon the pastor must have downloaded from somewhere late Saturday night.

Okay, this was a purposefully whacky list. If you can relate to any of these internal excuses, signs, or avoidance qualities, in some sort of way, then maybe the experience of attending church has grown stale.

It’s normal to have spiritual slumps. It can’t be wise to think of walking with God as a continual emotional high, and when it’s not experienced as such, something is horribly wrong. Like any journey, there will be hills and valleys. Faithfulness demonstrated as a choice done continually, (rather than a feeling-based action) can really see us through times like this. God is always with us, whether we “feel” him or not.

However, I’ll make a different point. There is also a tendency to fall into a consumer mindset, and feel like church-going is like shopping, and picking out something you like. We probably all do it, to an extent. Have you ever walked out of the service on Sunday thinking, “That wasn’t really what I was hoping for,”? Yep. Unmet expectations are common. But, it doesn’t have to wreck the whole bit of it.

Church doesn’t have to delight us every time, and soothe us. Most times it won’t feed us, not in the deep ways we crave. Those times are often found in community that can plumb to greater depths, and do the harder work, but build the stronger bonds that make genuine growth possible. (Think small groups, or spiritual directors, spiritual mentors, and discipleship situations.)

Church isn’t just some way to get recharged for your week, and be poured into. But, have you noticed how easy it is to slip into that bare minimum, and consumerist outlook of it? I have. I’ve been guilty of it way too much.

It’s not about just an experience, nor is it just meant for worshiping God with others. We worship God all the time, whether we do it poorly and unawares, or we tune in and give him our whole selves. We are his creation, our lives lived are a form of worship, like it or not.

Church-going, and the whole of the spiritual walk, are about applying the gospel to our lives in every circumstance and situation, the whole way through. God’s grace and love came down. He draws us to him. He restores. It seems we co-opt and yield to his mighty, gracious work to changing us radically, to be more like him.

Sometimes it just comes down to sucking it up. Sometimes it means you have to change, not your local church.

Have you ever been burned out on church, like I have, at one time or another? What helped you?

Leave any kinds of comments you’d like.