Fear is Jail

jail

Fear is  jail.

The world has so much information to offer.

Libraries, schools, experts, and the troves of resources on the internet make learning almost anything possible.

But is success probable? Only sometimes.

Education and information don’t create success. If it did, success would be simple and assured.

Since it’s not, there’s always some psychology to understand first.

Namely, fear.

Despite the resources, we hit bumps. We stagnant. We get discouraged. We give up too soon.

We are both afraid to fail and afraid to succeed. We fear the unknown and the too familiar. We fear change and we fear sameness.

Just knowing this can take a few teeth out of fear and can give us a cell key.

cell key

Information can help us through our fear. It’s a tool, key. But, we can sit in a cell whose door is wide open.

We assume information is the solution sometimes. It’s certainly not.

That’s why when you make resources and opportunities available to a frightened population success is still rare.

People–whether they know it or not–get stuck being afraid. Jailed.

But, back to the key: Information.
We live in a time were we can pick so many things for ourselves. The rich and powerful used to corner this market. Not just recently in the Industrial Age, but in every age. Social classes, gender, skin color and many other inescapable factors determined what you could accomplish in a lifetime. No more.

But so much will stop us. So, back to fear. It must be tamed. Always.

A path, a formula, or expert advice make wading through a bit easier. But here is the best key: As we utilize our resources we sill have to be honest that we are fearful and it affects us greatly.

If you sense that you aren’t moving forward, or you’re distracting your self routinely, ask yourself some hard questions about what you fear.

Armed with those answers you can push through if you get brave. Fear will be back of course, but you’ll be more prepared for it. You’ll do battle again and again. Know your enemy. Use your tools. Work your key.

Moms, Don’t Wait for the Book Deal

In a conversation I had recently with some writing friends (friends that regularly write…and all of them mothers), I realized that they all were hoping to be discovered through blogging to land the book deal they wanted. It happened to a few people and they really hoped it would happen to them. They were really trying to make it work. It was frustrating for them. Some felt jealous, some bitter, some resolved to prove they could do it.

It’s really an out-of-date idea this blog to get a book deal thing. Maybe 7-10 years out-of-date, or more…though once in a while it works.

It’s like playing Powerball. It seems like you could win big, but you never do. It’s someone else.

There is a whole industry propping up this idea of landing a book deal too. Billions and billions of dollars are wrapped up in it. There are conferences, agents, tons of ebooks, paper books, articles, and whole websites to help you do blogging and writing better and to help you get published or build your platform that will interest and convince publishers. But the actual premise of all this is like the cassette tape. It worked once, and was considered normal, but now there are better options for your talents. Ones that feel more deeply meaningful too.

Discarded Transformers Cassette Tape At The Side Of The Road, Clarach Valley, 23-07-06

David Jones via Compfight

Over the next few months, I’m going to be going in depth about how you can actually make money writing.

It’s not by freelancing,

blogging and guest blogging,

selling website ads,

getting a book deal,

or self-publishing.

What could it possibly be then?

More on that soon!

It’s also about a entire shift in what success means.
The truth about the dream? The “prize at the bottom of the box” of all that hard work isn’t the big book deal. Many with book deals will tell you the true tales of woe dealing with editors and publishers expectations, exhausting obligations, and accountants who repeatedly want you to prove you are a legit option. Then, in the end, you are left to market the whole thing yourself anyway. This doesn’t apply if you’re famous or infamous though. (Plenty of people try to drum up controversy to get noticed and it works for a few people, but it’s not a winning idea and can turn you into a bit of a monster, it seems.)

Most authors don’t sell more than 1,000 books. Most. (My agent told me that.) When then do sell any, they get about a $1 or less per copy in royalties. Some dream!

That is a terrible return on all the hard work and the time invested. The other options are better ones. The prize you thought you wanted? It doesn’t exist. Not really. That’s the secret they won’t tell you. They can’t tell you that! The industry still needs you to believe that the prize is good enough and still available. The sooner you make a new path for yourself, the better off you are.

But, that doesn’t mean your dream of success should be over and your talents unused. Not at all.

It just takes adaptation and some cleverness. I’ve been consulting folks on how to make the shift, like I did. I’m going to open up the process for you too.

A few years ago, I saw the change was just ahead. Wicked. crazy. change. I did something no one would even think of doing. I had an ace in the hole, but I let my literary agent go. I don’t like to say “fired” because he did nothing to deserve it. I told him I needed to change direction and we amiably parted ways, and we mutually ended  our contract.

He’s a good agent with an incredible track record getting deals and has represented some best-selling books. He turns down most who approach him. He was really really surprised, obviously. I went on instinct. I decided to not stick with convention and the known outcomes in the “formula” to be a successful author. The machine of publishing is deteriorating leviathan. The better fit for me is picking my own path and utilizing technology. I’ll be sharing how in the next weeks and months.

I decided I wasn’t going to wait to get picked. I didn’t like the game. I decided to not be a part of a failing system that was starting to heavily rely on celebrities (all with ghostwriters btw) or gimmicks to keep their publishing houses running. I wanted OUT.

The move seemed asinine, at least on paper. (At that time three of my writing friends had tried to get this agent’s interest and got shot down, and I was letting him go? HUH? Since then loads of others have been rejected too. I had him for  the taking but I said “no thank you”.) Yet, it opened me up creatively to do my best work and find my own prize, not the phantom book deal carrot held out just out of reach by a whole industry propping up the slick myth.

It really was the day I went Pro. I’ll let you in on a few secrets I learned in the next few weeks and help you find a way to come into your own creatively as you let go of the false or shoddy promise of landing a “great book deal” or signing with great agent and making it big. That is so 90s.

Don’t get me wrong, authors sometimes get signed and blogging still helps get deals…rarely. But in the end of the whole process most authors are deeply unsatisfied or underwhelmed. Not just because they reap so little, but because they have so little control in the process, the machine of it. The good news is the gatekeepers don’t hold on the power as they once did, and technology has created new doors.

The book deal that seemed so amazing? I can buy her book for $2.99 at Ollie’s Bargain Outlet just 3-6 months later. (I do it all the time.) The system is busted, but the word isn’t getting out.

Stayed tuned for more. The gloves are coming off.

The “KISS your BLISS” Effect

You’ve heard “follow you bliss,” right?

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.”
― Joseph Campbell

“If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be.”
― Joseph Campbell

[This is wiki link for the scoop on Campbell]

Campbell wrote “The Power of Myth”, “The Masks of God”, and “The Hero of A Thousand Faces” among many other works and was an American mythology professor, writer, and orator best known for his work in the fields of comparative mythology and comparative religion.

Follow your bliss refers to a path you take. The journey and the making of a hero.

(video is cheeky and humorous summary of what happens in a Hero’s Story)

It’s the journey of every great person and every life well-lived also.

herojourney

(photo source)

My offshoot and focus is “KISS your BLISS”.

Why? Because nothing’s more active than that (and it rhymes, which is a nice mnemonic device).

This is the name for the moment you cross the threshold to adventure and finding your purpose. It’s when you decide you have a deeper calling in this world and living from your core is what counts most. I’m crafting a book on this right now and it’ll be out this fall. I hope you’ll come back for more details soon.

You will find that once you embrace your passion and gifts and kiss them full on the mouth a switch happens. At that point the sides fall off your holding cell and it turns into a go kart. You pick up speed, scream in delight and your passion is infectious.

Make no mistake: It is a risk.
There is true danger involved.

At the KISS POINT you will gain two things:

1. A following–people you splash with your passion who come for the ride, guide you, or cheer you on.

It is also characterize by new and better-fitting opportunities unveiling themselves and new connections and relationships  emerging. You’ll “be on to something” with all kinds of vague but palpable mystery that whispers of the divine. You’ll feel “in the flow” with new energy and a revived sense of purpose.

2. The devils–people (or systems) who are threatened by your passion or jealous of it because they are lacking it and feel empty.

The obstacles will be new too and formidable. You’ll feel a target on your back and a strange level of animosity that has no proper explanation except that which points off the map to something cooperative and moved by the otherworldly trying to thwart you and divert your path. Weird, I know.

This is the Kiss your Bliss Effect.

Sound at all familiar?

That Carol Jones!

Carol Jones

Yet another kind review for the new book  “Dog in the Gap”? Yes. But, this time it’s different.

Carol Jones isn’t just a writing and idea guru, she’s a 20 year friend of Doug Jackson and his wife Becky, and she has the pictures to prove it. How splendid that she wrote this special post. It’ll warm your heart.

Here’s an Excerpt:

What is most beautiful about
Dog in the Gap is how it “probes questions about trust, mutuality, ownership, personal and spiritual growth, grief and joy through the acute lens of canine care-taking and guardianship.”

I believe Doug says it best in his introduction, “Man with dog,” writes C.S. Lewis in “The Four Loves”, “closes a gap in the universe.”  This book is written from inside the gap.

Written from inside the gap.  I love that.

Read the rest here.

I  hope you’ll grab a copy of our book. And, please, leave us a review on Amazon and help us spread the word.

Thank you from Doug and me!

You Don’t Wear Pants

click for photo source
click for photo source

(The best part about Teresa’s article to me? The various mentions of not wearing pants. It’s just always funny.)

Teresa Shourds writes a very funny blog and I love how she handles this review which could have been awkward seeing as she is not fond of dogs. gulp.

Can a non-“dog person” enjoy the book I wrote with Doug Jackson? Read on and see!

EXCERPT:

Doug asked if I would take a gander and review, you know since I’m a fellow writer and all.

Specifically, he thought it would be an interesting perspective “coming from a person who is ahem – less than enthusiastic about dogs (per a recent blog)”. I’m assuming he means this blog.

He’s right.

I’m not a dog person, or an animal person really.

I don’t torture them. I’ve learned over the years to add that clarification because once you’ve acknowledged counter cultural feelings concerning pets – people go to dark places… immediately.

I’ll watch your cat sleeping on great dane video – once.

Past that – I’m out. I don’t like messiness, germ-i-ness, destruction or poop.

I have no affinity for the idea of Spot roaming freely throughout the house taking liberties with shoes, table legs, rugs and the trash in the bathroom. I really don’t want you sitting on my furniture – YOU HAVE NO PANTS ON. Plus I’m pretty sure you drank out of the toilet. Oh, and please stop licking my leg…
I saw what you licked prior.

READ THE REST!