Tag: Sunday morning

Everything…but connection

chianlink

My friend Kayla visited her parents’ church over her summer break for 10 weeks or so.

They were attending this suburban church with a large attendance each Sunday morning and I thought she’d really enjoy the change. Maybe she would be disappointed to come back to her normal, small-town life.

When I asked her about it, she said, “I should have loved it. The music was amazing; the people friendly. They had lots of youth programs and small groups going, and the pastor chose meaningful things to teach. I should miss it, but I don’t.”

This surprised me, so I asked her why she thought this was.

She said something so simple that it gave me a punch of profundity.

“You don’t miss something you don’t feel connected to.”

I started to wonder about the people I’ve lost through death, circumstances, or diverging paths.

Some I missed and some I rarely thought of. Those I did not miss much weren’t really all too different (in general) from the ones I did miss. It didn’t directly reflect the quality of person they were or if we had a lot in common. Like Kayla pointed out, I missed the ones I felt connected with and to. Reflecting on that, the ones that had stronger bonds created more longing or loss in the void of their absence.

That may seem pretty obvious, but the critical gap comes in when we miss why we are connected and what it means to be available and vulnerable on a regular basis with others you can trust. Apart from that, you won’t miss much.

I sense something has been lost in many communities of faith and in many other places because we are so much more amused by our distractions than we are connected in deep ways.

Human connection is never really about measurable stats. We already realize this. It’s about investment in others, sure,

but it’s also about the reciprocity of that investment. It’s always a two-way street.

Some people are wonderful and you invest and hope for a harvest–of some sort–where you both benefit, and you assume they do too, and then it doesn’t happen. The fruition doesn’t manifest or withers on the vine. Maybe the soil was bad, maybe a storm came or drought, or pestilence, maybe something else thwarted success. Sometimes it’s obvious and other times you just sense something is wrong that is hard to make right again. Sometimes you just need to move on and other times, you have to try again in a new season with different seed.

That happens in faith communities and in interpersonal relationships. It happens in business and in extended family life.

If the connection is lacking you won’t be missed. And you won’t miss them. It’s likely that you will feel disappointed about that.

We overlook the idea and process of true connection even as we want it the most.

 

Is there some thing or someone you’d like to feel more connected with?

Oh,
3 more things.

1. I will be posting a “spiritual-themed” topic about once per week. The other times I will concentrate on other ideas depending on what strikes me and will often concentrate on topics related to helping you create and communicate better.

2. I really am excited to see what this year brings and I’m really happy you came today.

3. Check the top right sidebar to get the next post sent to you through Feedburner!

 

10 Misconceptions Christians have about non believers-part II

L'antic poble de Santa Creu / Abandoned medieval village
Creative Commons License SBA73 via Compfight

 

This is continued from this 1-5 article.

It’s REALLY helpful to read that part first for context, I assure you!

Now on to the next half:

6. Non believers live in fear and doubt.

It’s interesting that many from inside the Christian bubble will ascribe these attributes to non believers when a simple gaze across the church goers on any Sunday morning will show the very same thing to be true of Christians too. I don’t know anyone who does not live in fear and doubt at least from time-to-time. What some Christians won’t tell you is that the local pharmacists know a lot about their fear and doubt even if those in their small group aren’t privy to the matter. And some people just drink, shop, or puke their fattening meal to cope. What is more true? To be human is to fear and doubt. We may call it worry or concern, or a prayer request, but it’s there for Christians and non believers alike.

7. Non believers are afraid of death.

Some are not. Some Christians are not. Not everyone braves their impending physical demise well. This is not so strange, because imagining not needing or using your body anymore is really odd. Really really odd.

Even a Christian who will tell you they know for absolute sure that they will be in heaven with Jesus at the moment of death, as you probe them further and they get into specifics their ideas about all that there is a shift. Either they will often become full of fantasy (sourced in the poetic and figurative descriptions of the afterlife from the Bible which they have illogically decided to take literally [sic.] Pearly gates, streets of gold, or Jesus riding a gigantic purple horse) or that may dissolve into what becomes rather unsettling admission of mystery. Can you really know the particulars? Of course not.

It’s thoughtful to be challenged by the unknown–which is what death is. It’s important to come to your end of surety. It keeps us humble and growing. For everyone, that portion of life and death is a matter of faith, no matter what we believe will happen once our heart stops and we will soon be lowered underground. It is creepy because we are used to being alive, breathing and such. We hate it when others we love die, and leave us, and the whole thing is strange, if we are going to be honest. But, are we?

8. When they behave properly, non believers unconsciously borrow ethics from Christians.

Oaky, on this one, perhaps I’ll say “Yes and No”. In the U.S. the influence of Christianity in our common society is thick and unavoidable. Yet, unbeknownst to Christians, behaviors we (Christians) consider good Christian values and ethics are also part of a meta ethic known the world over and through the whole span of human history. (Following through and getting it right is a whole different business, of course.) This meta-ethic, which many secular anthropologists downplay, or quickly chalk up to darwinian processes, (ad hoc mind you) actually seem to point toward the transcendent. The philosophers get into this quite a bit. So, the part of us that is involved with consciousness is ever-present and point to a place off our seen “map” if you will. Call it the “Devine Spark”, “God”, Yahweh, the Universe (if something impersonal could somehow also be personal, by whatever), the “higher self” (a la Alcoholics Anonymous), or what-have-you…we are essentially speaking of the same big thing… that incidentally is no thing. The Other, the great I AM, the life force, and really when we split hair on that big point, we miss the forrest for the trees.

9. Non believers discredit the unseen world.

This is hardly ever true. Yes, there are a few full blown materialists, but like the unicorn, they are rarely seen and then, only for a few fleeting moments in the perfect circumstances like when painted on velvet or when Harry Potter is nearby.

The desire to discover the mysteries of life are ever-present. Media is a great barometer for this. For instance, witness the many horror genre movies (ghosts, zombies, paranormal stuff, aliens, etc) and all the tv shows groping for answers from the spooky and paranormal night-vision scenes from the many television shows on cable, to the mediums, psychics, and spiritual celebrity gurus and even mega-church personalities (Yes. I’m including everyone from Joel Osteen, (Joyce) Myers, Oprah, Deepak Chopra, and Rick Warren, to Billy Graham, and the Dali Lama). Our gurus and guides are plentiful and that’s because the demand for them is so high. Plus, the prophecy folks of all stripes continue their empires as the masses feeling around in the murkiness for answers.

10. Non believers are going to hell one day.

Okay, this is the one that may get me the hate mail. Just hang on! The reason that this is a misconception is because we can’t know how Grace will or won’t affect a person once they die. We trust in Grace. In the idea of it existing; in the Being that doles it. Can we know another person’s heart that well? I doubt it when our own heart is so unfathomable and fickle for us. Grace is big. As big as you think it is, you are wrong. It’s bigger. I’m always wrong about grace because I cannot fathom it for too long.

Thank you for joining me. If this article made you think, please share it with someone.

Sign up for the next article? I can’t tell you what it’ll be but I think you’ll like it.

Fasting Class, January 23rd

Bellegrove Church, Anneville, Pa

My first session with the brothers and sisters at Bellegrove church was a lovely time.
For those in my last class, the free online copy of Brother Lawrence’s Practicing the Presence of God is here. I hope you enjoy it. You will also find more resources for Lectio Divina here. Just type those two words in the search field, and BOOM–jackpot.

Fasting is the topic for next week.

Together, we’ll be covering the questions:
What is fasting?
What does it involve?
Who fasts; or who should fast?
What’s the point of fasting?
What are the benefits? What are the drawbacks?
How and when has it been used in the Bible, and throughout Christian history?
What kinds of fasting are there?
Should I fast, and for how long?
Guidelines, explanations, and interaction this coming Sunday, January 23rd, and 10 a.m. Bellegrove United Methodist Church, Anneville, Pa. (Worship service, with Pastor Dave Alderson, begins at 8:45a.m.) We hope to see you. The previous post with more details, here.

For those who can’t make it, I’ll post some notes on the lesson, next week. Or, if you’d like to set up some sessions with your group, of 5 or more, contact me.

Have you ever fasted?
Please, share your last experience with fasting, here.
Thank you for reading.


7 Things You Might Believe during the Playoffs

SO, it’s the the season of the NFL Playoffs. I’ve noticed myself bending toward some folksy theology. Maybe you’ve noticed this for yourself. Or…just let me remind you. :)

Bring on the comments, friends! Can you think of any items I missed?

1. Caffeine is somehow linked to the Holy Spirit.

2. People who use the words “Demon Alcohol” don’t use the words “Demon Lactose”, but really, which one seems more demonic on a regular basis?

3. Gluttony of anything [but food] seems sinful, but eating until it almost hurts is a worthy epicurean goal, and probably some sort of “listening to God thing” or even a gifting of the Spirit.

4. Lack of a TV makes you more spiritual, but the possession of an iPhone helps you help God.

5. Twinkle lights in December and January help show the Light of God’s Love, but by March they are tacky, and used by Satan to distract people from the blessing of Spring and rebirth.

6. The ability to host a kickin’ NFL Playoff party with great food is called “the Gift of Hospitality” and it makes God proud when when use our gifts. [I’ll be over @ 4p.m.]

7. Routing for teams like the Cowboys, the Eagles, the Browns, the Lions, (and so on) develops the Fruit of the Spirit we call Patience. So, it’s a good thing, but like many spiritual lessons, it is learned through pain and struggle. Watching such teams fail each year helps those fans grow spiritually…more than Patriot or Steeler fans, let’s say.

So…That’s 7 nutty beliefs that can happen in January. Have you noticed anything weird lately? If so, please share.

4 Classes at Bellegrove United Methodist Church, Anneville

Beautiful Bellegrove church, near Anneville, Pa

Pastor Dave Alderson and I invite you to learn and experience 4 classes on Spiritual Formation topics, at the Bellegrove church a bit north of Anneville, PA.

Going southbound down Rte 943, this beautiful stone church building is located on the left, just north of the small village of Bellegrove. It is 5 miles from I-78 exit South from the Annville/Ft. Indiantown Gap exit for [South] Route 934 heading toward Lebanon Valley College, Anneville (Anneville @ Rtes 422 & 943).
(Get custom directions here.)

I will prepare 4 interactive sessions for the 10 a.m. time slot, for this January 16, 23, 30 and Feb 6, 2011. If you plan to come, please leave a comment below, or call the church (717) 867-7460, so I can prepare materials for your use.

Topics will include prayer, spiritual growth, devotional practices, fasting, and related subjects. Brief and engaging explanations will precede class discussion and involvement. This time is sure to bring added vitality to your prayer and worship experiences with God, and promote spiritual growth and intimacy with our Savior, both collectively and individually.

We really look forward to seeing you!

Please-DON’T Forget! Here is the book I’m giving away (to one “lucky” reader this January) to make Bible reading WAY more interesting and effective.

Can’t make it? Contact me and we’ll come up with something. :)