Word Archives - Page 7 of 11 - Lisa Colón DeLay

5 Questions you have to answer before you can be a success.

It’s crazy!

4 times this week I’ve been approached for my brain!

I’ve heard things like, “You’ve done a great job strategizing and promoting so-in-so, and I don’t know what I’m doing. I’d like to ________ (be a published author, sell my ebook, get speaking gigs, create a following, etc.)”

So I thought maybe instead of giving the info out time and again I could create a post with strategy tips to get you started if you fall into that category, too.

If you’re a musician, expert, artist, writer, speaker or whatever…it’s harder than ever to get noticed and build a following of those who will want what you have to offer.

It’s the problem of TOO MANY OPTIONS. (It’s paralyzing)

Most publishers, for instance, won’t even look at your stuff without an agent. They have cut their staffs and gone with sure-bets, like celebrities who hire ghostwriters. (I’m contractually obligated to avoid specifics on that bit.) But, you know what ? Agents want sure-bets too. You’re stuck researching and writing endless proposals to prove you are a good bet that just get rejected after all the hard work most of the time.

It’s even worse if you don’t know your way around a blog, promotion, social media, or ways to integrate what you are doing with the right people. You get stalled!

In the end, making something great is only half the battle.

You have to execute. As Seth Godin says, “You have to ship.”

I’ve found that great “crafts-people” (think good at a certain field: experts, academics, talented artists, experts, artisan, inventors, writers, signers, etc) often lack in the area of marketing themselves well and creating connections that pay off. They do something great, but don’t have the lateral thinking prowess outside their niche to know how to get it sold or stake their claim in their field.

As one person put it, “I’m an academic. I stay in my study and write and hope someone magically wants to read it.”

Well, that won’t work, of course. Others have to know about you to realize that you are amazing.

It’s hard to be good at both craft and marketing / connecting, but those are the people who really make it. Or the people who make it know how to delegate properly for what they aren’t expert in. That’s a KEY point. (Keep that nugget. it’s free.) :) You just can’t do it all.

Here’s the hopeful part!

Even if your aren’t a celebrity or infamous or have someone huge to vouch for you to land a deal, there is a lot you can do to generate buzz, especial if you can mobilize your fans/audience that already trust you. It the wilderness route, but with a little bit of $ and lots of hard work (a.k.a. “bootstrapping”) it can make a dent.

Through bootstrapping and almost no money I get 100,000 visitors. That’s nice and all, but it’s not as fun as helping others realize their goals and dreams.

So, I want to help. This below is some of what I’ve been telling other people as they get started.

Get a piece of paper! (seriously)

If you have something you want to share and make a name for yourself, or you want to start getting compensated for your goods, services, or talents be prepared to answer these questions specifically:

(yes, on paper or in a digital document, right now)

1. Who is your audience and how many people would buy the book (or service or product) from you *right now*?

2. What is your budget for marketing and promotion? (This of course will determine how much can be done.) You shouldn’t go forward if you can’t spend $500 – 1,000 to get the ball rolling. If you don’t have the money, you should save and do a bunch of leg work first on your own. Again, with the bootstrapping.

(This means you have to put what you love to do on hold, or hire out help.)

3. What are you doing already to promote what you have, if anything (website? Facebook page or group? speaking? workshops? readings at the library? church groups? MOPS? social media accounts? gathering an email list of fans?) (Be able to show what, if anything is already being done so it can be can ramped it up, or started if it hasn’t been.)

And what could you do, if you started? (write it down)

4. What connections do you have or people do you know who would help you get the word out? colleagues? teachers? librarians? leaders? church folks? groups, camps, and clubs? anyone famous or well connected (like to Focus on the Family, for example? ) People in tv, radio, bloggers, local newspapers, or journalists and writers to feature you?

5. What can you offer for free to build trust and gain a following?

That’s it!

…But, sometimes it’s overwhelming! If you’ve haven’t thought to ask these questions, you fall into the category of craft-person more that of “marketer” or “promotion and communications guru”…and that’s fine, but you’ll need help.

I can help. Contact me!

The Big NEWS! Book Announcement

This is the news I’ve been waiting to share with you!

If you ever loved a dog, owned a dog, or just wondered why they are so beloved, we have something we (Doug Jackson and me) created with a lot of love.

And it’s not just the book you see below coming soon, there will be a lot of extras coming too. Stayed tuned in August for more details and please join us as we get going at Facebook.

Portions of the proceeds will benefit 2 non profits we’ve selected that care for canine companions.

So here’s some details:

1. If you want a pre-launch Review Copy, let me know.

(There will be a limited number released, with special consideration for those who have a tribe and want to help us get the word out.)

2. If you’d like a sample, cool! Sign up for the free stuff in the popup window, or by going to the Free Stuff page to register.

3. The Dog in the Gap Group

• Learn the release date,

• get more details,

• view sneak peaks and extras,

• link up with other “friends of dogs”,

• and follow along as we launch here. Buckle up!

Names for Women (or how language is oppressing us)

How do you spell oppression? …maybe E-I-E-I-O. Today it almost looks like we’re down on the farm!

Let’s look at some names, shall we?

HEIFER/COW – connotation towards female: “a fat woman”

(actual meaning: a female cow who has not borne a calf/female cow)

VIXEN – connotation toward females (according to the dictionary) “a spiteful and querrelsome women” (but a google search turns up very racy photos indeed)

(actual meaning: a female fox)

SOW -connotation toward females: “a female police officer, or a degrading name for a woman”

(actual meaning: a female pig)

NANNY– connotation toward females: “a female caretaker of children”

(actual meaning: a female goat)

HEN-connotation toward females: “a gossiping woman”

(actual meaning: a female fowl)

QUEEN – common connotation: “a man behaving unmanly and defectively as a woman” (as in flamboyant homosexual male) Also used for a female monarch.

(actual meaning: a female cat)

TOM -common connotation toward females: “tomboy” a female who does not behave as expected.

(actual meaning: a male cat)

BITCH – connotation toward females: “an annoying or whining female, a disparaging name for a woman, or a person who is dominated”

(actual meaning: a female dog)

SIRE – a respectful and formal name for male royalty, such as a king.

(a male dog, or other male animal parent suitable for pure breeding)

COUGAR– connotation toward females “a sexually aggressive woman”

(actual meaning: a large wild feline)

NITTANY LION – a pedophile named Jerry Sandusky (okay that one is just a joke I heard)

MADAM: connotation toward female: “a woman in charge of prostituting women”

(actual meaning: a formal way to address a women in respect)

SIR: A polite way to refer to a man.

MISS: An unmarried woman

MISTRESS: connotation toward females: “A woman having an illicit sexual relationship”

(actual meaning: The prefix of a formal name referring to a married woman or the female head of a household. Abbreviated as Mrs.)

MISTER: A formal way of referring to a man, and sometimes used humorously. Abbreviated as Mr.

(And finally, my least favorite. Scientific studies show that this word is also typically the one men most dread being called. Seriously.)

By now, you probably have noticed some commonalities. And maybe you can even think of further examples I left out.

What surprised you most?

To me, it doesn’t seem that language favors women. Not the English one anyway.

It also seems that if a man is degraded or thought of an less than, a woman serves as a reference point of that inferiority. This is male privilege in action–every. single. day.

The standard of male as apex not only supports male dominance and heralds masculinity as the preferred societal and ontological ideal, but also works to continually degrade women as inferior. Since language is spoken everyday, every day we learn and re-learn the expectations and norms.

With many names women are highlighted as having defective qualities sexually, morally, physically and are routinely animalized (reduced to sub-man/sub-human) in a hugely disproportionate ways as compared with males. Yes?

Our language reinforces power structures and privilege, and sustains oppression. We should be honest about this. We should be aware.

People will refer to a women as a “girl” but rarely to a man as a “boy”. Plenty of other examples or preference exist.

So, now what can we do to make things better?

…how do we turn this around? I’m taking your suggestions.

Oh, and what’s with all the cat comparisons anyway, right?

# # #

Michael Hyatt says he features the “Best Leaders” (Men) Click http://wp.me/p1g2iA-3bK

Krama & Grace a la U2’s Bono

Phil Romans via Compfight

Bono:
You see, at the center of all religions is the idea of Karma. You know, what you put out comes back to you: an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, or in physics; in physical laws every action is met by an equal or an opposite one. It’s clear to me that Karma is at the very heart of the universe. I’m absolutely sure of it. And yet, along comes this idea called Grace to upend all that “as you reap, so you will sow” stuff. Grace defies reason and logic. Love interrupts, if you like, the consequences of your actions, which in my case is very good news indeed, because I’ve done a lot of stupid stuff.

to read a large excerpt click here.

The book with the entire interview:

The next post is coming soon. Click the word “content” in the right sidebar for special deliveries.

A Fig Leaf for You & a Fig Leaf for Me

Peter Adermark via Compfight

A shinny new sports car!

Fast. Convertible. Hot stuff. As it growled away I thought,

“What a Fig Leaf!”

In about 30 seconds you can see (or hear) the things people do to cover up… to compensate and distract themselves and others from their insecurities. It’s all a Fig Leaf dance done to hide shame.

To see it in ourselves can take a bit more time. Funny how that is!

We are always, it seems, pushing back somehow on the sense that we aren’t enough. (Even by drawing a comparison, which is what I did when I spotted a sport car fig leaf, reveals my cover up attempt, “I’m not as bad as that.” I said in my heart.)

Consciously or unconsciously we send signals to whomever might listen, even if the listener is us:

• I’m smart enough

• I’m talented enough

• I’m wealthy enough

• I’m pious enough

• I’m capable enough

• I’m attractive enough

• I’m good enough

• I’m strong enough

• I’m loved enough

• I’m dedicated enough

• I’m worthy enough

I. am. okay.

Each way a Fig Leaf. Each way a stab at trying to reconnect and find home. We all long for connection and acceptance.

Social creatures as we are, we still want to look like we have it all under control and can go it alone. The sinking feeling that perhaps we cannot sends a jolt of pain that has us picking fig leaves and making coverings for ourselves.

The truth is being vulnerable feels like being naked. We hate it. We feel exposed. We’d rather hide.

If something or someone reveals our mistake or shortcoming, we take it personally–as a reflection of some core flaw. Fig leaves are everywhere.

I don’t have a sport car to show off, so my fig leaf might not be so obvious to others. But it’s there! Oh, and I have much more than one fig leaf too. I too feel like I’m not enough, and plenty of ways and failures come up each day to point it out for me.

The only thing that helps to give me traction and drop a few leaves is admitting it and risking and then relying on my closest relationships to reorient me–including my relationship with God. Those who really love me reinforce that I already am worthy of love and acceptance. God reaches out in Scriptures, through others, and in the Living Word (Jesus the Christ) to drill home the fact that he covers all shame with empathy and love.

Guilt = I did something wrong (admit it, fix it, move on)

Shame = I am something wrong (we stay stuck, we go numb, we disconnect, we over-protect ourselves)

If you want to drop a few pitiful fig leaves, start by taking a risk and reveal why you cover up. You don’t have to do it in public, but apparently you have to do it to be well.

Brené Brown (who you’ve probably realized by now has inspired this post) says that “We are only as sick as our shame.”

I’m reading this, and I recommend it to anyone who has a Fig Leaf or two.

PRAYER FOR THE SHAMEFUL

God, hear my prayer!
I keep scrounging for things to make me feel better.
I remain unfound by your love in times when I deeply need it.
Be my Hope and Deliver
Let your love wash over me and renew me
That I can be born again into a greater Light and Love
And even as a new born baby is vulnerable and so dearly loved
Let me sense that I am your child in the same way
I am strongest and most protected when I realize I am in your arms
Let me sense your acceptance and closeness.
Remind me of who and where you are.

Click for Verse of the day