Tag: Humor

When your Kids HATE Mealtime Prayers

some other family enjoying mealtime prayer

Do you pray before meals with your family?

This Christian spiritual practice is one I grew up with. I was praying at meals since I was 3, and I remember some of those first prayers. Do you remember getting to pray for the meals as a child? It felt like an honor to be asked, as I recall.

Here’s where it gets weird.
My two children (ages, almost 11 and 8 years old, respectively) seem to loath mealtime prayers, under any circumstances.

Unlike many children from praying homes, mine rebuff any offers to say the prayer at mealtime, even when they are sweetened with awesome bribes! They usually complain about mealtime prayer, despite our conversations about having our particular family tradition and its importance in our view of the world. Most often, the kids see mealtime prayers as a unpleasant obstacle preventing their nourishment. And, it seems to be worsening as time goes by.

That’s right a 30 second prayer time before meals is worse than other forms of child torture…like going to bed at 8:00, or hanging up one’s coat, or emptying the silverware from the dishwasher. I don’t get it either.

As a person who’s spent hundreds of hours researching and learning how to help people grow spiritually, this is a bit of a black eye…oh, and a punch in the gut. It’s not just a bit embarrassing to realize, but  it makes me think that perhaps my children’s basic spiritual formation is compromised if these times of prayer are not meaningful and helpful when we do them. I think we could all be the worse for our failure here.

So, I’ve been speaking with my husband about how we can change things up, and enliven family prayer time to make God, and thanking God for our food more participatory, vivified, and worthwhile for all of us. I want children with grateful hearts.

I thought of some ideas, and I hope you will contribute to the mix too. I could use your ideas and advice.

Idea 1. Lighting a candle:
Kids love fire. Right? I’d like to try to light a voitive candle for each of us and read John 8:12

Then Jesus said, “I am the light of the world. The one who follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”

We can then respond. “Thank you Jesus for your light in our hearts. Thank you for our meal. Amen.”

Idea 2. Maybe adding a kind of prop, visual aid, or short object lesson with our practice would make it not just a more interesting time, but will carry on in their thoughts. Then, at night when putting them to bed, we could bring it up again, for a little meditating or conversation for an evening prayer.

Idea 2. Maybe using a mixing of responsive prayers during the week could awaken us to a richer time of thanks before meals.

Prayer 1:

(lead voice) The eyes of all wait upon you, O God,
(others) And you give them their food in due season.

You open wide your hand
and fill all things living with plenteousness.

Bless, O Lord, these gifts to our use and us in your service;
relieve the needs of those in want and give us thankful hearts;
for Christ’s sake. Amen.

Prayer 2:

(lead voice) Bless us, O Lord, who bless your holy name
and by this food, feed us for your holy service.

(others) Thank you, Father and Lord. Amen.

This one could be said after meal time, to add some thankfulness “bookends” to the time together.

After meal prayer:

(lead voice) All your works praise you, O God,
(others) And your faithful servants bless you.

They make known the glory of your kingdom
And speak of your power.

For these and all God’s gifts and graces,
let us bless the Lord.
Thanks be to God. Amen.

Other ideas:

1. We could also go around the table and thank God for something. (My kids balk at this usually.)

2. We could stand and hold hands, or change our posture during prayer, from the norm (which for us is holding hands while seated).

3. When could listen to a singing of a psalm, or worship song before the meal.

HELP! What else can be done to make mealtime prayer better?

Ice Baths and Squats (or, Care of Body as a Spiritual Discipline)

ooo cold ice bath!

It is a Spiritual Discipline to properly care for your body. It’s one I’ve been quite poor at doing.

I was really fascinated by these 3 “body hacks” from Tim Ferriss that can help with fat loss very efficiently and speedily.

I pass them on to you for 5 main reasons.
1. It’s good for you (body, mind, spirit).
2. I’m going to give them a try and doing them together would be more fun.
3. They’re very simple, and your success will encourage us both.
4. I LOVE to share awesome things I find with my friends.
5. Warmer weather is coming (which means less hide-your-bulges clothing). Really it is only about 6 weeks away, and you’ll thank me.

CLICK this link below to view the videos. AND Keep me posted, please.
Four Hours to Your Perfect Body, Pt. 1

Have you ever had an ice bath?

How much would you have to be paid to try it for 10 minutes?

From Professor to Gilligan in 27 minutes: Worldviews

The exhilarating feeling of being asked to teach Worldviews at my alma mater has been replaced by more of a sinking feeling. So, I’ve gone from Professor to Gilligan before teaching even one class.

I think it will go just fine…but getting from here to there with 3 days preparation time will be reminiscent of crunch time during final exams.

Will you please pray for me? Seriously.

Over the course of the next few weeks, I’ll share some of what my class will be learning. (Okay, I admit, I like how the words “my class” sound.)

First a definition: What is worldview?

A worldview is a working theory of reality, used for living in the world. It is a framework of ideas, beliefs, attitudes about the world, others, God (whether you believe in him or don’t) ourselves, and life. It includes a comprehensive system of beliefs — with answers for a wide range of questions.

We all have a worldview, but many of us have never really examined it, or thought about it, all by itself, and in contrast to worldviews of other generations, cultures, and religions. Our worldviews collide. Watching one segment of bickering at Fox News will tell you that. By our worldview we come to understand our values, on a quest for truth.

It is said that the worldview of modernity could be (generally) comprised of the years 1789 (Storming of Bastille) to the Fall of the Berlin Wall 1989. We now live in a time of transition which some term postmodernity or hypermodernity. The predominant hallmark of the era being the underlying assumption that  “Truth is ‘…a mobile army of metaphors, metonyms, and anthropomorphisms…’ “. A.k.a Truth is different for you than it is for me (relative truth). Or, Truth is what you think truth is.

In our times, Science is questioned or discarded as the supplier and authority of truth with the common conviction that objective truth may or may not exist. Therefore, truth is inaccessible due to the nature of one’s personal standpoint of all knowledge claims.

CASE IN POINT:
Witness the decades long “4 out of 5 Dentists recommend Trident gum” advertising campaign? (This one below is from 1971.) What seems strange about it (Besides the weird hairdos and peculiar music)?

NOW-Here’s how the same company sells gum to people with a postmodern worldview (2008).

Which commercial makes you want to buy their gum?

For those of you who’d like to follow a bit more closely, read Part I of Nancy Pearcey’s book Total Truth.

Like Jael, I got you so pegged

Don’t be tempted to …ahem… peg Jael as the Biblical forerunner of the fierce “Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling”. She was a nobody who cared for sheep and endured the harsh elements.

As a tent dweller of the Kenite clan, she was riffraff to the nth degree. (The spiffy clothing you may see her depicted in is just wishful thinking. A bath would be hard to come by, let alone silk fineries, and dainty hairstyling.)

The Biblical story of Jael is hardcore violence! (10 sec read here)

So-NEVER doubt this, Jael is one shrewd and formidable female; and she clobbers an expert of war, with her own violence, as a part of God’s plan.

She’s sharp, very sharp.

Here lies the mighty Warrior, Sisera…almost pinned down.

Could this be one instance (of many) where a Bible story may effect an impressionable mind?

 

Perhaps envision the scene following a Bible study at a female penitentiary … “Yo, ladies, are you ready to get your Jael on!? Wooo…” Okay, maybe not. But, I can totally see a Bible inspired video game for Christian families….rated T for Teen (of course)… that includes this scene. The object would be to get in the most spike poundings before the warrior wakes up. That’s completely obvious, right?

Incidentally, this story also proves how brilliantly somniferous warm milk can be. Note to self.

Most importantly, this story begs us to root for Jael, and everyone like her. She’s an impoverished foreigner. A diminutive herding woman. And she triumphs in a crucial battle to save a whole nation. Underdog doesn’t begin to describe her.

This isn’t just an astonishing battle tale, or reversal of fortune story, it’s a message of hope for all of us up against the odds. God gives us the strength to peg and conquer our obstacles. God’s character is shown in this and the many underdog stories in the Bible.

Literarily unheard of, this story is like no other. No other ancient literature in the world included women very much, let alone wrote them up as full- blown heroines. But, God captures his heart for us within this story of an unlikely woman who saves an entire people group from destruction.

Remember this:
Undoubtably, you have God’s camaraderie when the odds are against you, or when your foes or circumstance seems too great to overcome.

God has mercy for your “type,” and it is his joy to help you prevail. Keep your hope in the Lord, the Almighty King.

Do you ever feel like an underdog?
What would you like to pin and conquer?

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5 (Poor) Reasons to Fast

Some of us don’t fast. Some of us fast for the wrong reason. This is the first of a few posts on FASTING. Bring your thoughts to the table, and stick with us until the end. I promise, you’ll see Fasting in a new light.

Here are 5 Poor Reasons to Fast, and the “inner monologue” that may follow one’s rationale. Can you see yourself or someone you know in the following?

1. To lose weight.

(inner monologue) Oh, if I could only lose these last 8 pounds. I know, I’ll kill two birds with stone, and fast. It’ll be like a diet, only it’ll make God happy, and me feel better about myself at the same time.

2. Because other people are fasting.

(inner monologue) I’m going to look like such an pathetic loser if I don’t join in this fast with my group. There’s going to be an awkward silence if or when I don’t have something to say amazing to say about my fast.

3. To prove something to yourself.

(inner monologue) It’s just time for a change. I’m ready for God to do something BIG. Really Big. There’s nothing like fasting to give God the signal that I’m ready to follow his lead. This time I’ll try for 5 days.

4. To attract positive attention.

(inner monologue) I like to tell my friends when I fast…to keep me accountable. But it makes me feel encouraged to just tell them about it, I must admit. Hopefully, it encourages them.

5. To feel more spiritual.

(inner monologue) Sometimes when I’m going through a dry period spiritually, I like to crank it up a notch, and give food the boot for a while. I want it to sort of give me a boost, and start a fire for God in my heart.

Have you ever thought any of these things? What has been your inner monologue, or dubious reasons you’ve heard for fasting?

I’ll be address each one of these, and your comments, in the next post.
Can you think of a bad reason to fast?

TO BE CONTINUED…
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