The “Praying for Enemies” Misconception

waterhouseRemember the Sermon on the Mount?

It’s the 4 chapters ( Click to read Matthew Chapters 4-7 ) where Jesus lays out this upside down, counter-intuitive foundation for the Kingdom of Heaven on earth. He shows how God’s ways don’t look like our ways. It’s a recapitulation of the law of Moses that was warped by God’s people over time and needed to be righted.

Disciples of Christ try to get this passage into their DNA and live it out. While many claim to be Christians few really follow or even grasp the framework Jesus lays out for the Kingdom. Maybe it’s too challenging.

In Matthew 5 Jesus covers the very unpopular idea of not hating our enemies.

• We like to side with people we agree with.

• We like to make sure people know where we stand and what we oppose.

• We love our own

(Much like today, the prevailing thought at the time was that your kin, tribe, or people group are your neighbors and you should love them. Everyone else? They could be treated like enemies. Jesus stresses that our enemies are our neighbors too and later he uses the parable of the Good Samaritan to make his point about what love and following God really looks like.)

But, back to hating our enemies…

(quote blocks cover Mathew 5:43-48)

 

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbori and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven.

 

Loving our enemies means blessing them. Blessing our enemies means we enrich their lives.

But, what about the prayer part?

There’s a common misunderstanding that this verse implies that we should pray for blessing for our enemies, or pray that good things happen to our enemies, or perhaps the most common…we should pray that they will change.

(That’s one I’ve done quite a bit!)

Jesus’ point is different.

He’s not suggesting that we pray for circumstances to change or for our enemy to change, but that’s just what we do, isn’t it?

No. The point is that our enemies and the persecution works to change us into children of God, when we do as Jesus would do.

What praying “for them” means is that we are praying for them to be our teachers. We are praying for us. The trying experience shows us the potential to take on the nature of God. A nature that is so radically different than ours.

God’s ways are the ways of love.

• What does that mean?

It becomes more obvious as Jesus continues the thought and tells us something about God and his character. 

How good is God? Thoroughly. Or we could say “perfectly good”.

In fact, he is so unsparingly generous in his goodness that…

He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.

Huh? That seems odd. He does good to bad people. . .

We think of justice as righting wrongs usually by giving someone a form of evil or payback for their evil, and rewarding good with more good. We like liking those who like us and we like punishing or casting out those we don’t like.

For instance, in two minutes on Facebook and you’ll see demarcation lines drawn. Outsiders and insiders. Good and bad. Idiots and smart.

We assume that praying for them (to change) is the godly option …

(because we are actually tempted to do something really nasty and let them have it…but, gosh, we are holding our selves back, you know, because of trying to be godly and such).

The godly thing to do is to think and act through the framework of love as our heavenly Father would.

This has nothing to do with feeling warm fuzzies or giving out hugs. It’s about fundamental fairness, as God defines it.

It’s about a shift is perspective.

Jesus tackles that next:

If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?

 

So what should we do instead? Jesus says…

Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

Don’t trip over the perfection part.

The point of the statement is to show how God is thoroughly good and also quite different in his ways than you and me. Be like God.

Being like the good Father from heaven is the true aim. This portion of Matthew 5 isn’t truly centered on what to do about our enemies. Weird, right?

It’s about transforming our thinking and our ways into Kingdom ways.

(That’s what all of the Sermon on the Mount to geared toward.)

The more good and loving we are, (even to those who are unlike us, or who hate and mistreat us), the more we are like children of God and children of his kingdom (dominion).

The contention Jesus makes is that God doesn’t play favorites.

Most people don’t like this part and don’t truly go along with it. We do gymnastics to find some useable loopholes or other verses to avoid the this part, because we define ourself by who our favorites are.

Why doesn’t God play favorites?

Because he really loves us. It is the very nature of God, as defined and modeled by Jesus.

Evil is redeemed through generosity, forgiveness, and love.

Sounds crazy, of course, but we see this happen all the time.

• Remember the story of Officer Jeremy Henwood who bought a child a happy meal just a few minutes before he was violently gunned down in a random attack (and his good deed was caught on video)?

 

• Or the woman from Rwanda who’s only son was violently murdered. She not only visited the young man who killed him and visited him in prison, but later adopted him and became his mother when he had no place to go.

This stories make us want to be better people through just hearing the story!

• Think of Jesus dying for his enemies.

• Think about how true forgiveness makes things new.

Because we let the person off?

No.

It’s because we have transformed.

We stopped letting the offense trap and define us.

The next time you think about “praying for your enemies” remember:

• You are praying for you.

• You are praying for your mindset to change about what is happening.

• You are practicing being a child of God.

 

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Supercharge Your Message with these 3 Secret Powers

kindness

 

Robert was a guy who wanted something. You could tell.

He wanted what a lot of people want. He wanted his idea out there. He wanted to get noticed and get recognized and make a better living. As an accomplished amateur guitarist he loved music and created a service focused at musicians. But, he couldn’t seem to get much traction.

After looking at his business and his marketing efforts I noticed something.
It was just below the surface but it tainted just about every Robert did.

Stinginess.

I didn’t come right out and tell him this, “Hey, friend, you’re stingy. People hate that. It’s like client repellant.” But, I did ask him a few questions and he stumbled onto the conclusion himself.

They were these 2 transformative questions:

1. What are your doing out of pure kindness to your target group?
(What are doing to simply serve this group, without hoping for or gunning for something in return?)

2. Are you empathizing fully with your group and their needs?
( What are their biggest needs and how does that make you want to respond? What will you do about it?)

A big shift happened. A light in a dark room moment.
(That’s what I LOVE about good questions. They shift things.)

It was like a wall broke down for him. He started thinking. Really thinking. Then he starting looking through a new window (perspective & worldview). New options and possibilities came into view. Discouragement vanished.

Instead of being centered on scarcity and never having enough (money, clients, opportunities, options), Robert started remembering how much good he could do.

Doing good felt good. Soon, it actually made him a better person for it. This new spirit didn’t extend to just clients, but his friends and family benefitted as well.

The new generosity of spirit made all the difference.

His empathy supercharged his efforts.

His message got out better this way.

Here’s what happened:
He started offering some of his services for free, no strings attached. This was valuable. Several musicians caught on and passed along his information. One of those leads provided consistent income almost right away. Then he reached out to a few local non profit groups and gave them some great work for free. They gave him some positive public testimonials and a few direct referrals. (He wasn’t helping them so they could help him in return, but after he gave of himself so generously, they wanted to help him out.)

His old message came off like this: “I have something and you need it. You should want this.” 

Result? Dead ends and closed spirits.

His new message consisted of actions that worked like a megaphone. They said, “I’ll come along side you. Everything will be fine. I got this. No worries.”

People started searching him out. He didn’t have to work as hard to be noticed because his actions were secret super powers.

• Empathy

• Kindness

• Generosity

It drew plenty of attention. The right kind of attention. People were happy to pay him because they saw more value in his service. The stingy people that didn’t want to fork over any money for the value he brought them faded into the background. The more he invested and gave to the 80-90% of the folks that valued him, the better things got.

CONCLUSION:

Remember your Secret Super Powers.

If you’ve hit a wall with a project there’s a simple fix: If promotion, marketing, exposure, or getting your message out has stalled in any way, revisit your levels of 1. empathy, 2. no-strings-attached-kindness, and 3. generosity.

Reinstitute a lot of that back into your efforts, let go of the wheel, and see what happens. These secret super powers only work best if you put your true heart into it and live it out fully.

They are fertile things that birth the same spirit and goodness back to you.

Now some questions for you…

What message are you trying to get out right now?

(A project, a book, an album, a class, a service, a product, etc.)

What’s a way you can be more empathic and generous?
(In that spirit, let this be your first bit of exposure. You can share that here, if you’d like.)

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Thanks for visiting and thanks for being awesome.

-L

5 Tips for Writers & Creators in 2014 (Infographic)

Valuable Content!

I’m making it my 2014 goal to give my writer and creator friends a lot of valuable content this year to help you get your message out, potently, all year long.

 

This will be a big year for you. You don’t just have to waste hours on Facebook, playing your phone Apps, or punching out blog posts 47 people read. You can offer related products and services based on your strong suits and build momentum.

If you’d like to gain a bit more recognition or make money on the side,  I’ll give you a bunch of ways and ideas for doing that…and no, the point isn’t to somehow get you to buy something from me. I may offer some useful, related things to purchase, but most everything will be free.

 

More importantly, I’ll help you with the marketing and web optimization side of things, so you don’t have to spend hours researching it for yourself. That’s like having two jobs.

 

I was reading Preston Yancey’s blog post the other day where he laments, perhaps even sincerely,

I #don’t hashtag because #ithinkitmakesmelooklikeanidiot and I don’t #knowhowtodoit #right.

Maybe he shouldn’t have to worry about all that. It got me thinking that some people are in the boat right with him…and Jesus,  Buddha, and baked goods.

If this is you…breathe in deeply and calmly. Slowly sip your coffee and relax. It will be okay.

 

You might not know all the big changes. For instance, did you know that Google has changed its main algorithm again? It affect searches. . .a lot. It’s had ripples…like layoffs. Some companies died because of it.

Getting noticed is harder than ever, if you care about that.

And unless you have a hefty following already, then, it matters.

(Rest assured, Preston does have a big following or Zondervan wouldn’t hand him two book deals. They aren’t people of faith precisely. They make take some shanks, but they don’t gamble. They are people who have a business to write about faith in a way that will sell, so they can have bread on their tables…in the wilderness, or, and more likely, in the classy subdivisions of city suburb in the Midwest.) You probably aren’t in Preston’s league.

If you want to just write for fun and the few friends that you attract from Facebook when FB feels like allowing your stuff in the news feed now, that’s cool. But maybe you’re hoping that doing something you love, like writing or creating, can also help you pay the internet bill a bit more, or even get you more exciting opportunities. That’s what worked for me. I write for other people more than ever at this point; and it’s fun to get paid for it. Really. It is.

You’ll find more of that sort of help here in 2014 in addition to other more familiar things you read here when I wax of the unseen and lasting things and get to use this space to explore, in both writing and deeper thoughts.

But, this is the announcement that I’m ready to help and share the info I’ve researched and the work I do in the MARCOM world.

 

To get us kicked off, these are the 5 Best Tips for starting your year off right. These trends are important to consider as you work and create in a noisy world.

Considering writing a blog post about the challenges of changing technology. What might you do or not do about it this year. I’ve made this infographic easy to embed to help you get started, if you want it.

 

Tips-for-Writer-&-Creators

Did that help you? I hope so!

Do you have writer or creator friends, too?
You can share the knowledge. Go ahead and embed this right on your site, if you’d like.

See you soon.xo

(connect with me or sign up for updates in the sidebar)

On concepts of communal Redemption

110px-General_Service_Medal_1962_obv

First, let’s start with the word deem.

The word deem has to do with regarding and considering.

Also, we often connote this word with giving something worth. It’s a verb after all.

The monarch deemed the knight fit for duty.

That’s the power of redeeming too.

Redeeming something puts the worth back in.

There is hardly anything that won’t improve with some redemption.

How does it happen? It’s not magic at all.

It pivots on the one offering redemption. That can be anyone, king or not.
Individually or communally.

Redemption reaches out. The reinstitution of worth happens after the deficit is noticed, and after the choice to correct it  has been made. I should rather say put it right, but more on that in a minute.

In redeeming merit is given, or rather given again. This would presuppose that everything has inherent worth at the onset, no matter what. That’s a salient point.

Sometimes redeeming happens without the prerequisite merit–and that is grace. Redemption and grace make a lovely pair.

You may have noticed that we go around deeming things all the time.

You will deem this short article helpful or a waste before you even get to the end of it, for instance.

The real genius of the concept comes when we realize that deeming and redeeming is always available. Offering it and attaining or receiving it. It more commonly found than you think, but you have to be ready to act. You have to be more than ready, but willing too.

So, one more big point:

There is a mutuality in redeeming. And that first smacks as counter-intuitive.

Redemption benefits both parties involved. It’s a communal because of the fact that is it a restorative act. And because it is restorative, it is just.

Want to start spreading redemption? You can help by sharing this on Facebook and letting it loose in your own life in little ways.

(Don’t forget to sign up for the next post-in the sidebar.)

It’s time for Weird Santa

I had a viral post last week and that was fun! Check it out.

I don’t watch my stats much. It gives me a brain bug. But a few times per week, sometimes, I take a peek and it was cool to see the huge spike upward. Stats used to get me on a roller coaster of moodiness. No more.

A special thank you to Ray Hollenbach and David Fitch who shoved the Myth of Ordinary Time post lovingly into the Twitterverse and also to everyone else who liked it on Facebook and read it and shared it. Was that you? Thank you!

Want a little holiday humor?

Search this site for Weird Santa Photos. 

There’s a trove you’ll love.

(caution: Santa appears to be Caucasian in these photos.)

Here’s one to get you started:

santastress